Directed by Rene Cardona
Starring Jose Elias Moreno, Cesáreo Quezadas 'Pulgarcito', José Luis Aguirre 'Trotsky' & Armando Arriola
An Enchanting World of Make Believe!
Bursting upon our BIG SCREEN in all the colors of the rainbow... a prize-winning blue ribbon treat for old and young alike! Here's something for the whole family to see together!
See All the Weird and Wonderful Characters of Make-Believe! The Fantastic Crystal Work-Room of the Happy Elves! The Fabulous Realm of the Candy-Stick Palaces!
At Last a Movie That's All About Him!
Better Than a Visit From Saint Nick Himself!
No Alternative Titles
Oh man. I don't know where to start with this one. In the grand tradition of extremely messed up Christmas stuff, we get Santa Claus. A Mexican film from 1959. This absolutely gets classified under the "must-see" category of bad Christmas movies. Where else are you going to see Santa Claus fighting a red spandex clad demon?
|Creepy Merlin helps Creepy Santa.|
Before Santa goes to Earth, he needs some help from his assistant, Merlin. Yep. You read that right. Merlin. Most powerful wizard in all the world (yes even more powerful than Harry Potter!), once most trusted adviser to King Arthur is now Santa's assistant. Bet ya didn't see that once coming, did ya? Oh it gets even better: Not only does Santa have Merlin squirreled away in his floating palace of mysterious wonders, but he's also got Vulcan in there! Not the planet, or the pointy eared species from Star Trek. I'm of course referring to the Roman God of Beneficial and Hindering Fire.....aka the Greek God Hephaestus.
|What the hell is this? Santa's Gloryhole?|
This is one film that simply has to be seen to be believed. There is just so much whacked out imagery going on that it's impossible to accurately describe how wonky it truly is. If you are a fan of not only bad cinema, but bad Christmas cinema, then you owe it to yourself to see this one. Some may find it a bit of a tough watch, but if you're in the right mindset (and have plenty of egg nog) then you'll be all set!
Body Count: Nope. Though I do wonder what has become of those child slaves that Santa keeps!
Boob Count: Of course not, you perverts!
Monster Count: Well, we've got Pitch. He's a dude wearing a red spandex devil suit with red facepaint. I think that counts.
I'm not going to lie, this one had me wondering more than once what the hell the filmmakers were thinking about. The whole giant floating palace full of child workers and bio-mechanical devices seemed like some kind of low rent fever dream that I might have had after eating a bad Swiss Colony cheese & meat platter. Yet, I can't help but find a certain wonky charm about it. This would make a good double bill with Santa Claus Conquers The Martians.
Three out of Five Pizza Rolls