tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-76326792819240095092024-03-05T04:08:14.770-05:00Midnight CinephileWatching Movies Past The Witching HourMatthew St. Cyrhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07870183182967553900noreply@blogger.comBlogger359125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7632679281924009509.post-26311350238744289322023-04-19T09:07:00.009-04:002023-04-19T09:11:15.526-04:00Cocaine Bear (2023)<p><span style="font-family: arial;"></span></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: arial;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgaM4NWA7mlxCj58oysDY9y-AunktbSTbFxZO_Z2YvnteJm8QJCYvUtk5otvkQmgcGfg7wZEH_QLf6ouevtFXCH5cboYOBJh_hoTYYZreQlPc7ECRHtMmEw6e0vOIZww-uj7nmUf0k4sK--Ng_54JIbwX4eCkNfzj_bRl8WLJ1Rp3tsrJSoPZprdxKBjA/s698/bandicam%202023-04-19%2008-44-24-600.jpg" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="698" data-original-width="470" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgaM4NWA7mlxCj58oysDY9y-AunktbSTbFxZO_Z2YvnteJm8QJCYvUtk5otvkQmgcGfg7wZEH_QLf6ouevtFXCH5cboYOBJh_hoTYYZreQlPc7ECRHtMmEw6e0vOIZww-uj7nmUf0k4sK--Ng_54JIbwX4eCkNfzj_bRl8WLJ1Rp3tsrJSoPZprdxKBjA/w430-h640/bandicam%202023-04-19%2008-44-24-600.jpg" width="430" /></a></span></div><span style="font-family: arial;"><br /><br /></span><p></p><p><span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></p><p><span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></p><p><span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></p><p><span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></p><p><span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></p><p><span style="font-family: arial;"> <b><u>COCAINE BEAR</u> 2023 </b></span></p><p><b><span style="font-family: arial;">RATED R 1hr35min</span></b></p><p><b><span style="font-family: arial;">Starring Keri Russell, Alden Ehrenreich & O'Shea Jackson Jr.</span></b></p><p><b><span style="font-family: arial;">Directed by Elizabeth Banks</span></b></p><p><b><span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></b></p><p><b><span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></b></p><p><b><span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></b></p><p><b><span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></b></p><p><b><span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></b></p><p><b><span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></b></p><p><b><span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></b></p><p><b><span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></b></p><p><b><span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></b></p><p><b><br /><span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></b></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><iframe allowfullscreen="" class="BLOG_video_class" height="364" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/OsIBBCHt3Xo" width="481" youtube-src-id="OsIBBCHt3Xo"></iframe></div><p></p><p><b><span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></b></p><p><span style="font-family: arial;"> </span><span style="font-family: arial;">Oh dear sweet Baby Cthulhu, what in the hell did I just watch? Well, I'll tell you...I just watched a black bear do a line of coke off of a leg that she just severed from a wildlife specialist that was hiding up a tree. Unfortunately for him, he was covered in cocaine, which the bear was addicted to. I watched that same bear chase down and ambulance and mutilate the crew and patient to the tune of Depeche Mode's "Just Can't Get Enough".</span></p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg2tan13bpW6z3c-NeF-b8F6dV0JvTgxGI0ozEAtTYjl05ZQYepiI0oX1tZhIaagHuwxi_kHPx2rPzqytne3CIcdf1hN49TFV93ADZEt6clMHvXGzKbVVB7YTafAlHvUyJeehvhdP_FiPCk0x2lTzAwRBFbAVwYWizai4kSR6-GFPT3MG0cv7e_nrctoA/s1277/bandicam%202023-04-19%2008-45-38-968.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="536" data-original-width="1277" height="268" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg2tan13bpW6z3c-NeF-b8F6dV0JvTgxGI0ozEAtTYjl05ZQYepiI0oX1tZhIaagHuwxi_kHPx2rPzqytne3CIcdf1hN49TFV93ADZEt6clMHvXGzKbVVB7YTafAlHvUyJeehvhdP_FiPCk0x2lTzAwRBFbAVwYWizai4kSR6-GFPT3MG0cv7e_nrctoA/w640-h268/bandicam%202023-04-19%2008-45-38-968.jpg" width="640" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgo5FGUqCzpk7nlBZALg09lpH5wIY60Ss0Mep8K-R6HX9VDZfFcpJsGDJHbBQJoCI3NzImpzdzm2C9Z8KGsP3j71vfDNoB2lEMThxoR1AB5g4WvOcbn2l-FARWzIH2ZAJDYXtTkmjSFZInvm1vD7q2L24YEPWOMTaSR4w8ZbwLkEVuYwfzDS7Mje-t5dQ/s1277/bandicam%202023-04-19%2008-45-17-854.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="536" data-original-width="1277" height="269" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgo5FGUqCzpk7nlBZALg09lpH5wIY60Ss0Mep8K-R6HX9VDZfFcpJsGDJHbBQJoCI3NzImpzdzm2C9Z8KGsP3j71vfDNoB2lEMThxoR1AB5g4WvOcbn2l-FARWzIH2ZAJDYXtTkmjSFZInvm1vD7q2L24YEPWOMTaSR4w8ZbwLkEVuYwfzDS7Mje-t5dQ/w640-h269/bandicam%202023-04-19%2008-45-17-854.jpg" width="640" /></a></div><p></p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: arial; text-align: left;"><br /></span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: arial; text-align: left;"> COCAINE BEAR is exactly what you think it is, and also far better than you are probably expecting it to be. I've heard lots of comparisons to SNAKES ON A PLANE, which I really don't understand. Sure they're both killer animal flicks based on a ridiculous premise...SNAKES ON A PLANE being about poisonous serpents being unleased on an airliner to kill a key witness to a murder. I mean, honestly there's not an easier way to silence someone? You're going to essentially try and take down a whole BOEING 747 to get one guy? That seems horrible inefficient to me...also horribly risky. COCAINE BEAR on the other hand is about a bear that ingests a shitload of cocaine that has been tossed out of an airplane by drug runners with the intent of collecting it afterwards. I mean...bother involve planes. Both involve deadly animals. Lots of people die in both. Other than that....I got nothin'.</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><p></p><p><span style="font-family: arial;"><span><span> </span>There are quite a few excellent performances in his one. First and foremost, Aaron Holiday was fantastic as young punk Stache. Clearly meant as comedy relief counterpart to Alden Ehrenreich's Eddie, he's got great comedic timing and more than once reminded me of Dax Shepard. Keep your eye on this kid, I think he's got a bright future. Margo Martindale is hilarious as Ranger Liz, an overly horny and slightly incompetent park ranger. Finally, Christian Convery as Henry, best friend to Dee Dee...they are two 10 - 12 year old kids who are in the forest while playing hookie from school and have an encounter with the titular beast. Finally, the great Ray Liotta, who we sadly lost in 2022, gives his final performance as Syd White, whose job it was to retrieve the cocaine.</span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: arial;"><span><br /></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: arial;"></span></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: arial;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi3ux8X8OmDhUgboDZ8cQdNdx2usskbmm9c6LznTRQGb0Q0Zv1MI1EFaHgk5hbkHdlG5JNwRYx74wXZE57uQjNcE7jI3yYYXUYvBOwSdstb1RNmZ27uSKlzy5Y2mv-wVl6SsDdy4Z2lFOQqLtVfyb7IDPSRl89Tri33rsSmAVINmNy4TFXjW_gyBRY_gg/s1277/bandicam%202023-04-19%2008-46-01-375.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="536" data-original-width="1277" height="268" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi3ux8X8OmDhUgboDZ8cQdNdx2usskbmm9c6LznTRQGb0Q0Zv1MI1EFaHgk5hbkHdlG5JNwRYx74wXZE57uQjNcE7jI3yYYXUYvBOwSdstb1RNmZ27uSKlzy5Y2mv-wVl6SsDdy4Z2lFOQqLtVfyb7IDPSRl89Tri33rsSmAVINmNy4TFXjW_gyBRY_gg/w640-h268/bandicam%202023-04-19%2008-46-01-375.jpg" width="640" /></a></span></div><span style="font-family: arial;"><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgvJz2J3RzPLwI5em75JeQMgQ39Zjhj_Jj6B8YexA751wstJqCv3LIJKFwP-DTluDH9sm8Ey_6gsaw49OF8pk5IQTIcOSTKPl-YMNyRRwGbj28wPERVdTi3Xd_nqRHtNH9V4SwSfheJ8TrCBgwFodz4Bo0LtHxl2kM4T5t5fjHKAg_9sMwtnU-KjEc6jA/s1277/bandicam%202023-04-19%2008-46-32-032.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="536" data-original-width="1277" height="268" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgvJz2J3RzPLwI5em75JeQMgQ39Zjhj_Jj6B8YexA751wstJqCv3LIJKFwP-DTluDH9sm8Ey_6gsaw49OF8pk5IQTIcOSTKPl-YMNyRRwGbj28wPERVdTi3Xd_nqRHtNH9V4SwSfheJ8TrCBgwFodz4Bo0LtHxl2kM4T5t5fjHKAg_9sMwtnU-KjEc6jA/w640-h268/bandicam%202023-04-19%2008-46-32-032.jpg" width="640" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div></span><p><span style="font-family: arial;">Speaking of excellence, Elizabeth Banks absolutely nailed the direction of this film, perfectly balancing the comedy and gore. She also does a fantastic job of recreating the 80's without overt product placement or bashing you over the head with pop-culture references. It is a film that just happens to take place in that time period, but it doesn't define the film. This could just as easily take place in 2023 with a few minor tweaks.</span></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: arial; text-align: left;">This is one hell of a fun ride. And while nobody delivered a line that was close to "I have had it with this motherfucking bear on motherfucking cocaine!", it still has some great one liners, some hilariously ridiculous set pieces and the above mentioned solid performances. I think COCAINE BEAR is going to be part of the cinematic lexicon from here on out. </span></div><p><span style="font-family: arial;"></span></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: arial;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhnrA0dqaZWD_5OFTwY7xfCry99ByCJ6dilo_R17RzuJ3SWiS_Oqvp-Iy_GuiDWSOOZRvVgbJrm9oMtrcHokg2fk31Xiq86RyW8HBBRA5zJlX1DdC_9JMgIg1dGbT_Co_pBFSdYV2k8ETzMum689Lmd228Tw7c6A2DhYRSeIUxdeAp5vttV2IhP51qjsg/s1277/bandicam%202023-04-19%2008-47-45-418.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="536" data-original-width="1277" height="268" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhnrA0dqaZWD_5OFTwY7xfCry99ByCJ6dilo_R17RzuJ3SWiS_Oqvp-Iy_GuiDWSOOZRvVgbJrm9oMtrcHokg2fk31Xiq86RyW8HBBRA5zJlX1DdC_9JMgIg1dGbT_Co_pBFSdYV2k8ETzMum689Lmd228Tw7c6A2DhYRSeIUxdeAp5vttV2IhP51qjsg/w640-h268/bandicam%202023-04-19%2008-47-45-418.jpg" width="640" /></a></span></div><span style="font-family: arial;"><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgdG-Ztq8bjOrSU2HXkOp_TONTj0r-EXWdy0EAVaF6v6QodV5R6EkWdpp7qfXMwCJe5HWoIn9TGoXgnmwF9-qfe5b4Df610l8Mwhg5SN2sB61R19dxpfsFEBPAVMLakqB5gneEzH_xrKHzixfilLBVhPyn4WRB6FHP-bEol8EjyySC-898pATDCgwS1nw/s1277/bandicam%202023-04-19%2008-48-01-505.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="536" data-original-width="1277" height="268" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgdG-Ztq8bjOrSU2HXkOp_TONTj0r-EXWdy0EAVaF6v6QodV5R6EkWdpp7qfXMwCJe5HWoIn9TGoXgnmwF9-qfe5b4Df610l8Mwhg5SN2sB61R19dxpfsFEBPAVMLakqB5gneEzH_xrKHzixfilLBVhPyn4WRB6FHP-bEol8EjyySC-898pATDCgwS1nw/w640-h268/bandicam%202023-04-19%2008-48-01-505.jpg" width="640" /></a></div><br /><span><br /></span></span><p></p><p><span style="font-family: arial;">Alllllrighty....let's run the Midnight Cinephile Tallies!<br /><br /><br /></span></p><p><span style="font-family: Pacifico;"><u style="font-weight: bold;"><span style="color: red;">BLOOD & GORE:</span></u> </span><span style="font-family: arial;"> </span><span style="font-family: arial;">Is there gore? Does a bear do cocaine in the woods? I think we both know the answer to this! The gore and effects are very well done and on the plus side, I would say that 95% of the gore is practical effects! WOOT!</span></p><p><span style="color: red; font-family: Pacifico;"><u style="font-weight: bold;">ALIENS, MONSTERS & MADMEN:</u> </span><span style="font-family: arial;">For the price of admission, you get one cocaine addicted black bear with a taste for human! Yum!</span></p><p><span style="color: red; font-family: Pacifico;"><u style="font-weight: bold;">T&A:</u></span><span style="font-family: arial;"> </span><span style="font-family: arial;">The closest your going to get to some T&A in this one is Margo Martindale's butt cheek showing through her pants after her first encounter with the bear. There's also some flesh missing off there...so.....this ties in with the blood & gore....</span></p><p><span style="color: red; font-family: Pacifico;"><u style="font-weight: bold;">FINAL THOUGHTS:</u> </span><span style="font-family: arial;">This flick is just plain fun. It reminds me of the heyday of nature run amok films, with a few winks and nods to the genre. This ain't your Daddy's killer bear flick, that's for sure!</span></p><p><br /></p><p><br /></p>Matthew St. Cyrhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07870183182967553900noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7632679281924009509.post-76100584322463442772023-04-16T17:31:00.001-04:002023-04-16T17:31:25.821-04:00Renfield (2023)<p>This has been a truly special weekend for me. </p><p><br />First of all, I launched Midnight Cinephile again and I've been getting the most wonderful comments from folks welcoming me back. Honestly and truly, I would like to say "Thank You!" from the bottom of my heart. I truly feel like I've come back home.</p><p>Along those same sentiments, this entire weekend has had a certain feel to it that I was unable to put words to for pretty much the entire duration of it. A certain warmth (besides the unusual heat for early April!) has been festering inside my chest. It was not until this afternoon when we were leaving the theater watching the very same film about to be reviewed, that it finally hit me right between the eyes what the feeling was. </p><p>I finally feel like my life is righting course. After so long, I felt like I was finally turning back into me again....and let me tell you something: I've missed me. But there's plenty of time for self reflection later, right now we've got a film to review! Let's do this thing!</p><p><br /></p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgPyiaCZPRiTTO3K1FHfj26-dXuthihQkOlPkujA_k6Ou-vdmBlFwvy9DRjfXzzIaLTdML6lzZ8zZSU2YTRIu0NR2FTcGvnkvWOLG7bfyrKDlugM5kbc0cE5lLzETmXj3cm_LKpOcgBqjHNMdZcaKUQAsjG6Gxz6MSLn4h980gIJ45HEyzy7TYu8OusSQ/s855/bandicam%202023-04-16%2016-03-13-549.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="855" data-original-width="550" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgPyiaCZPRiTTO3K1FHfj26-dXuthihQkOlPkujA_k6Ou-vdmBlFwvy9DRjfXzzIaLTdML6lzZ8zZSU2YTRIu0NR2FTcGvnkvWOLG7bfyrKDlugM5kbc0cE5lLzETmXj3cm_LKpOcgBqjHNMdZcaKUQAsjG6Gxz6MSLn4h980gIJ45HEyzy7TYu8OusSQ/w258-h400/bandicam%202023-04-16%2016-03-13-549.jpg" width="258" /></a></div><b><p><b><br /></b></p><p><b><br /></b></p><p><b><br /></b></p><p><b><br /></b></p>RENFIELD (2023)</b><p></p><p><span style="font-size: x-small;">Rated R - 1hr 33min</span></p><p>Starring Nicholas Cage, Awkwafina & Nicholas Hoult </p><p>Directed by Chris McKay</p><p><br /></p><p><br /></p><p><br /></p><p><br /></p><p><br /></p><p><br /></p><p><br /></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><iframe allowfullscreen="" class="BLOG_video_class" height="338" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/ICydLkeXq3w" width="479" youtube-src-id="ICydLkeXq3w"></iframe></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><p><span> </span>Let me just start this review by saying that there is a certain action sequence that takes place about midway through the film that I have been waiting for my entire life. Light spoilers ahead so if you don't want to know ANYTHING about the film before watching, skip the rest of this paragraph. I'll wait. Okay, you still here? Groovy. <b><span style="color: red;">******</span> </b>There is an action sequence in which I literally watched a man rip off another man's arms and not only beat him to death with them, but also several other people as well! He also does something else with the arms but you're just going to have to watch to find out what! <b><i><span style="color: red;">******</span></i></b></p><p><b><i></i></b></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><b><i><br /></i></b></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><b><i><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEig1R9wuEB6DZW39d8jGh-YBeB4ghthRl9PGZiP9NiqK5mTmrQonXI5k22nX4ReT9wgXPnzt2pWtq4h1Bdd1AB8ZxMy9gMnmjD59Opd0QzDyVFqYSmd8JXckxwAZkBQdGfC2uq0XAw0XW6dpMLBzp0Wk9qbZdZdZbKKq1_Ee79GiCQE85rA9Qczr8B7TA/s1280/bandicam%202023-04-16%2016-06-36-953.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="539" data-original-width="1280" height="270" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEig1R9wuEB6DZW39d8jGh-YBeB4ghthRl9PGZiP9NiqK5mTmrQonXI5k22nX4ReT9wgXPnzt2pWtq4h1Bdd1AB8ZxMy9gMnmjD59Opd0QzDyVFqYSmd8JXckxwAZkBQdGfC2uq0XAw0XW6dpMLBzp0Wk9qbZdZdZbKKq1_Ee79GiCQE85rA9Qczr8B7TA/w640-h270/bandicam%202023-04-16%2016-06-36-953.jpg" width="640" /></a></i></b></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><b><i><br /></i></b></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><b><i><br /></i></b></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><b><i><br /></i></b></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><b><i><br /></i></b></div></div><p></p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhKEc8SQPBI_AbYGRBth1uBvLOAf848VXGaSbJgz4OaC8mXn0NzUx9X68xZYZ79Ojq1RLVRhiSEdJ_Gsp-hg1ATZnr0YWxTV23-jxPNlotwuoEEuF6nPKSL65UpXNEJlxByD6MnAt_HKu4z5LvNqsY9ekbVGZ8ea-NtcwzTYKhcRHlSBp6ptTh7jP5wgA/s1280/bandicam%202023-04-16%2016-04-57-624.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="539" data-original-width="1280" height="169" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhKEc8SQPBI_AbYGRBth1uBvLOAf848VXGaSbJgz4OaC8mXn0NzUx9X68xZYZ79Ojq1RLVRhiSEdJ_Gsp-hg1ATZnr0YWxTV23-jxPNlotwuoEEuF6nPKSL65UpXNEJlxByD6MnAt_HKu4z5LvNqsY9ekbVGZ8ea-NtcwzTYKhcRHlSBp6ptTh7jP5wgA/w400-h169/bandicam%202023-04-16%2016-04-57-624.jpg" width="400" /></a></div><span> </span>Robert Montague Renfield (Hoult) was a lawyer who travelled to Transylvania to facilitate a real estate deal with Count Dracula (Cage). As I'm sure you are aware, he falls under the vampires spell and spends the rest of his existence doing his evil master's bidding. That is the story that we are all familiar (see what I did there?) with. This film takes a much deeper look at the character and just what it means to serve the Prince of Darkness...the toll it takes on your soul and your sanity. Did I mention this is also a comedy?<p></p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgSBeP3XIt80XMgnYiO20wcOZdpx08GsRKYboxv1JKln-oZq-pxRNqR2rxSk8EGR3rf-cOethJQqSSLsocQhpDkeXiNC_qeIeV5R3hUJvLt-Yi42R4yxb8EpiYihRaRmBLRo4ZDXJ-ZDJn9LQYh4clRhHh06fLm6A75tXHGE0X5VsFbuFpGhdeexsydDg/s1280/bandicam%202023-04-16%2016-05-48-727.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="539" data-original-width="1280" height="169" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgSBeP3XIt80XMgnYiO20wcOZdpx08GsRKYboxv1JKln-oZq-pxRNqR2rxSk8EGR3rf-cOethJQqSSLsocQhpDkeXiNC_qeIeV5R3hUJvLt-Yi42R4yxb8EpiYihRaRmBLRo4ZDXJ-ZDJn9LQYh4clRhHh06fLm6A75tXHGE0X5VsFbuFpGhdeexsydDg/w400-h169/bandicam%202023-04-16%2016-05-48-727.jpg" width="400" /></a></div><span> </span>We follow Renfield and Dracula to modern times in the U.S. living in an abandoned hospital. Dracula got himself pretty fucked up after a run in with some vampire hunters and (as always) Renfield must tend to him and nurse him back to health by supplying fresh victims. The thing is...he's tired of sending innocent people to their deaths, so he starts attending a self help group for people in toxic relationships. As he listens to these poor souls work out their demons, he finds their toxic counterparts and takes them to his master for feeding. Dracula is less than pleased with the...shall we say....less than pure stock of blood being supplied to him.<p></p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjpRjTNt9hOdOWcyKhYTj1Wp4n_5TrCa7F15LUqDSrPShK9RdU8GxdWxz21qz1i_tnd9gZrgBr7giYjJKsvRlprsJ9snpBECZHip97H0faGTypA2yjzOdOZietO1G578qKZivdxVKIGyyue2ku33Wbkv6TYwv-FDRbaMrFA5v-YsN4v8Co-I0koyNyu4w/s1280/bandicam%202023-04-16%2016-10-44-943.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="539" data-original-width="1280" height="169" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjpRjTNt9hOdOWcyKhYTj1Wp4n_5TrCa7F15LUqDSrPShK9RdU8GxdWxz21qz1i_tnd9gZrgBr7giYjJKsvRlprsJ9snpBECZHip97H0faGTypA2yjzOdOZietO1G578qKZivdxVKIGyyue2ku33Wbkv6TYwv-FDRbaMrFA5v-YsN4v8Co-I0koyNyu4w/w400-h169/bandicam%202023-04-16%2016-10-44-943.jpg" width="400" /></a></div><span> Meanwhile, a local crime family is causing massive problems for the law abiding citizens and officer Rebecca Quincy (Awkwafina) has had enough. Her father was murdered at the hands of the vile Lobo crime family, some of the police force is crooked and on the take and she doesn't know who she can trust. She shows up at a joint called Mulates, which looks like it has a very New Orleans/Voodoo kinda vibe to it. In short, I wish it was real place. Just so happens that Renfield is there, searching for victims (there a table full of nuns AND a school bus full of cheerleaders just dropped in too!) and feeling quite sorry for himself. When he see's Quincy stand up to the son of the crime boss, Renfield is inspired. Perhaps he doesn't have to live in Dracula's shadow any longer.</span><br /><p></p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhPtoa1MO5gkBCl2pCrZWkrx70TU1R-PyYW8O7fbHstRe0cdRefMVgmxeV0dum0_U3naXH6qwuWjT6Ls8uGOyYMPeqThqJsZWQfVeuegD7GPf_4EOaEhI3MirUnHs5XruN2iNtXSg6IusMSCj8iJqqs7_rbupysI4hLwePHcP1i0a96HEf-WZmy-A4n_A/s1280/bandicam%202023-04-16%2016-05-53-342.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="539" data-original-width="1280" height="169" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhPtoa1MO5gkBCl2pCrZWkrx70TU1R-PyYW8O7fbHstRe0cdRefMVgmxeV0dum0_U3naXH6qwuWjT6Ls8uGOyYMPeqThqJsZWQfVeuegD7GPf_4EOaEhI3MirUnHs5XruN2iNtXSg6IusMSCj8iJqqs7_rbupysI4hLwePHcP1i0a96HEf-WZmy-A4n_A/w400-h169/bandicam%202023-04-16%2016-05-53-342.jpg" width="400" /></a></div><span> </span>Long story short, Renfield and Quincy take out quite a few members of the Lobo Crime Syndicate. Renfield starts taking steps toward recovery from his own toxic relationship, starting with a new wardrobe and a studio apartment of his very own. Could there be some romance brewing between him and Quincy? Could be but there's not going to be much to for that because this is after all an action-horror-comedy. Shit goes sideways. Of course it does. I'm not going to go any further with plot....just the set up.<p></p><p><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj_QZnk49Deyb2WCGBuP3jxL_bXE4YFztSB0FuzmOHasjDpledD4r1mfQwJhiU6tGpJNRVTjZK8Pq7fhC00o2j5j3goUwiQNp6caH0mv0QZ9Xl24Km7O72Bzs0kBJ_BASjnIbIKrgJddwDeBo9fzs-poUc9hW5SBAMrPwjACvHPKd5_GQwAtHVbjI_VmA/s1280/bandicam%202023-04-16%2016-08-02-272.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="539" data-original-width="1280" height="169" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj_QZnk49Deyb2WCGBuP3jxL_bXE4YFztSB0FuzmOHasjDpledD4r1mfQwJhiU6tGpJNRVTjZK8Pq7fhC00o2j5j3goUwiQNp6caH0mv0QZ9Xl24Km7O72Bzs0kBJ_BASjnIbIKrgJddwDeBo9fzs-poUc9hW5SBAMrPwjACvHPKd5_GQwAtHVbjI_VmA/w400-h169/bandicam%202023-04-16%2016-08-02-272.jpg" width="400" /></a><span> </span>Renfield absolutely delivers on everything it promises and actually quite a bit more. I was expecting to be entertained by the film, but I was surprised by HOW entertained I was. Universal decided to put it into an April slot, but I think that this could have easily held it's own during summer blockbuster season. Well, let me walk that back a wee bit. It could hold up to most summer blockbuster seasons...maybe not against the likes of Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny and Transformers: Rise of the Beasts...those are pretty heavy hitters. But still.....I think it would have done just fine. I think that Renfield is going to find itself a cult following quite quickly.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgN0PtSo5oadVMhP-wg2-CcInI7ZgnIJfZVgNtyTpL9fIoW3768SjkYnVYFQ-Bx8r0L23rZ4v1nkXxVAH-hf6xsGgJx3x12IHrkyPqukS6rs1G8v_QiW0sllKqj4K4PeZolUQE_23Xt0MHlk-QGxm-1YXAnsa0knR_kqjhXj_AVmakvOm3_-U11GydPlA/s1280/bandicam%202023-04-16%2016-06-24-041.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="539" data-original-width="1280" height="169" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgN0PtSo5oadVMhP-wg2-CcInI7ZgnIJfZVgNtyTpL9fIoW3768SjkYnVYFQ-Bx8r0L23rZ4v1nkXxVAH-hf6xsGgJx3x12IHrkyPqukS6rs1G8v_QiW0sllKqj4K4PeZolUQE_23Xt0MHlk-QGxm-1YXAnsa0knR_kqjhXj_AVmakvOm3_-U11GydPlA/w400-h169/bandicam%202023-04-16%2016-06-24-041.jpg" width="400" /></a></div><span> </span>Let's get a bit more cerebral here. This is a Hollywood film. A Universal film at that. Which means that they have at their disposal certain...shall we say...historical footage of Dracula. I'm 100% sure if the actual footage from 1931's Dracula was used and then deep faked with Cage and Hoult overtaking Lugosi and Frye, or if it was just and extremely faithful recreation. To be honest it was such a surprise to me that I was taking it all in and did not get to scrutinize it. Either way, holy shit what an incredible sequence! If you ask me, THIS is the sort of shit they should have been doing with their failed "Dark Universe" that started and ended with Tom Cruise's The Mummy. I could get behind trying a shared Universal Monster Universe again if they went the same direction as Renfield.<p></p><p><span></span></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgO0vURVg2Z4Pt4jOnDHgxL4wLmAY03mbG6sxa5y0rIZM5oWv0Nrh8rUufkLBQ4E2OPy7kNKd4UCilq3PZrurR-EIJ2JFh2EqlNDeZT6YTShmaTzcPRttIlHEryaXjzvmyvcmdZ8Fe9Fspni8eH8KCiBGble1ZK5XwZaYRPU_IqUzrImGVSYpTj_KcJxA/s1280/bandicam%202023-04-16%2016-08-44-709.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="539" data-original-width="1280" height="169" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgO0vURVg2Z4Pt4jOnDHgxL4wLmAY03mbG6sxa5y0rIZM5oWv0Nrh8rUufkLBQ4E2OPy7kNKd4UCilq3PZrurR-EIJ2JFh2EqlNDeZT6YTShmaTzcPRttIlHEryaXjzvmyvcmdZ8Fe9Fspni8eH8KCiBGble1ZK5XwZaYRPU_IqUzrImGVSYpTj_KcJxA/w400-h169/bandicam%202023-04-16%2016-08-44-709.jpg" width="400" /></a></div> Renfield is a pretty intensely gory film. Having said that, it would have been nice if a little more blood was practical effects. Granted CGI blood has made leaps and bounds since the days of say, Van Helsing, but still....you can always tell the real stuff from the digital stuff. Either way, red is red and there was a metric shit ton of it. I'm not sure EXACTLY how much a metric shit ton is, cause I live in the states and we used the ill advised Imperial System. Which, also only used in Liberia and Myanmar...you're welcome for the brief Geographic Units of Measure Lesson™. Anyway, it's a lot. Not like Dead Alive or Evil Dead levels, but it's got some gore.<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><p></p><p><span><span> The film also comes with a strong message about toxic relationships and self worth and it can beat you over the head with it a little bit, but you know what? In this toxic, hate filled world we live in, we could use a little positive reinforcement, even in our action-horror-comedy flicks. So there's that. If you get upset when people try to spread a positive message, perhaps sit this one out.</span></span></p><p><span><br /></span></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg2bLuAbhQi5aFP2T4WbT_im5XDW13m5QHuw29-L2Zs5Gytt82JaXScbEV3lPh7H66OcZjf8qR1QUjq2eWLicXpFXb6O0kt7mUZpQONGW7uBuYPr_xvsB_a3N0LdEwa8epomWGjgBePGSpTdtHB5raOu45qnTI-TntSldsQA2ULRq9cCXjImc-lf5MkgQ/s3252/20230416_153209.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1418" data-original-width="3252" height="280" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg2bLuAbhQi5aFP2T4WbT_im5XDW13m5QHuw29-L2Zs5Gytt82JaXScbEV3lPh7H66OcZjf8qR1QUjq2eWLicXpFXb6O0kt7mUZpQONGW7uBuYPr_xvsB_a3N0LdEwa8epomWGjgBePGSpTdtHB5raOu45qnTI-TntSldsQA2ULRq9cCXjImc-lf5MkgQ/w640-h280/20230416_153209.jpg" width="640" /></a></div><p></p><p><span><br /></span></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="text-align: left;"><br /></span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhMJbEllLu91u3jMfGiC2pqKzHEe313OLXOypjrvTC_2IMLEm8CK9WEXbwHRPBLHtIXfPMEbCz96Nsmc3ylDs6N8IMzJgPc656PlZlWOTqpNE0j4sfZU-ub8YFtWuhrXmMfCfRYY1gyRcJbIzjhEDczGJsMQRf8wzfDftDRBz4qt3XV77CPMIVqo984Jw/s4032/20230416_151312.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><br /></a></div><span style="text-align: left;"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="text-align: left;"><br /></span></div>On a final note, it was SO GREAT to get back to a theater. The Mrs. and I used to be at the movies constantly and a lot of that went to the wayside the past few years. It was so great to get back into it and I loved every second of it! </span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="text-align: left;"><br /></span></div></div><p></p><p>Let's bring up the Midnight Cinephile Tallies!</p><p><br /></p><p><span><span><span style="color: red;">BLOOD & GORE</span>: Wear a plastic poncho if you're sitting in the front row!</span></span></p><p><span><span><span style="color: red;">ALIENS, MONSTERS & MADMEN</span>: Monster royalty right here: The Prince of Darkness himself: Dracula! </span></span></p><p><span><span><span style="color: red;">T&A</span>: Negative, good buddy! </span></span></p><p><span><span><span><br /></span></span></span></p><p><span><span><span style="color: red;">FINAL THOUGHTS</span>: This is a super fun flick that goes well with greasy fistfuls of popcorn and a nice ice cold soda. Let the summer blockbuster season begin...we're off the a great start! </span></span></p><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjnU_lxcz5UdhhI6-MiV2Tb61OaTRv2NdU55dp3SWhYkJU4n9qk2CWk4L9ENijz3u77w8u8U9OCvSo0xlxN9Y5iRjtAZKafeqRENIaW5GozYoW7bcNxrhJ09iPTsqhBedzLInVhdSQaQZxma-OZR1XMCQDzPQchP9HHZsD5epNPE4z6N3DbisYQbkAkzw/s4032/20230416_151338.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="4032" data-original-width="2268" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjnU_lxcz5UdhhI6-MiV2Tb61OaTRv2NdU55dp3SWhYkJU4n9qk2CWk4L9ENijz3u77w8u8U9OCvSo0xlxN9Y5iRjtAZKafeqRENIaW5GozYoW7bcNxrhJ09iPTsqhBedzLInVhdSQaQZxma-OZR1XMCQDzPQchP9HHZsD5epNPE4z6N3DbisYQbkAkzw/w360-h640/20230416_151338.jpg" width="360" /></a></td></tr><tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">CHECK OUT THE LETHAL WEAPON 3 PINBALL MACHINE AT OUR THEATER!</td></tr></tbody></table><p><span><span><span><br /></span></span></span></p><p><br /></p><p><br /></p><p><br /></p><p><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></p><p><br /></p><p><br /></p>Matthew St. Cyrhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07870183182967553900noreply@blogger.com0Athol, MA, USA42.595932900000008 -72.226738339.35645564238213 -76.62126955 45.835410157617886 -67.83220705tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7632679281924009509.post-43412666764960664522023-04-14T10:08:00.000-04:002023-04-14T10:08:56.024-04:00Time To Dust Off The Cobwebs<p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhgjfhfu8G0MPunJ2X_dLCN9q3-QkGC81iNTja30VUrxJRbduowNqS-za42SAPWi0KCTwOszn10x6uds1Y5exmYG3doriCopDKXSdszr4SmyYtzhKsW_uFlE-zSPMDaKljLGTWCFNOcaTvus8zzxBMZ-i9ENJOZkdgcjeTn9fRlc9WFUBhJyMbfDS6OBQ/s800/TV.jpg" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="469" data-original-width="800" height="255" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhgjfhfu8G0MPunJ2X_dLCN9q3-QkGC81iNTja30VUrxJRbduowNqS-za42SAPWi0KCTwOszn10x6uds1Y5exmYG3doriCopDKXSdszr4SmyYtzhKsW_uFlE-zSPMDaKljLGTWCFNOcaTvus8zzxBMZ-i9ENJOZkdgcjeTn9fRlc9WFUBhJyMbfDS6OBQ/w376-h255/TV.jpg" width="376" /></a></div> Well then let's see now.....<p></p><p>It's been a while, my friends. Seven years by my count.</p><p>When last we crossed paths, it was April of 2016. Things were going in a few interesting directions in my personal life and I didn't think I had the proper time to give to Midnight Cinephile...and so I decided to shelve it.</p><p>Little did I know that my life would be complete turned upside down just a few months later.</p><p>On Memorial Day, 2016, my father fell and broke his hip. He was already in poor health with CHF, COPD and a myriad of other health issues due to a lifetime of smoking. He was rushed to the hospital and immediately underwent surgery for his shattered hip. I was sitting at work at the time when I got the phone call from my sister. As soon as she told me, I broke out into tears. Something deep inside of me knew that my father would never come back home. I'm saddened to say that I was correct.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh8D1BwcSFO4-31m7LDkh2Ph_M6BJbKboJfQ0K3JxJ6rFVj4gmkUU-mhO87mRSnprZgRPtTlOjpVMAmYM_aw1TL1NPh82iWRp1HlbTe-LD-DDRcSvTwqSjraTCWlijYrV-AQc9cxJr8BYfRi3nvnCqSO8cxtd13joe_8gWiEpGdZVTgdG-u5-HT8X0raA/s181/bandicam%202023-04-14%2009-41-04-067.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="181" data-original-width="156" height="215" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh8D1BwcSFO4-31m7LDkh2Ph_M6BJbKboJfQ0K3JxJ6rFVj4gmkUU-mhO87mRSnprZgRPtTlOjpVMAmYM_aw1TL1NPh82iWRp1HlbTe-LD-DDRcSvTwqSjraTCWlijYrV-AQc9cxJr8BYfRi3nvnCqSO8cxtd13joe_8gWiEpGdZVTgdG-u5-HT8X0raA/w188-h215/bandicam%202023-04-14%2009-41-04-067.jpg" width="188" /></a></div>He went through surgery okay and was discharged to a rehab facility. He was okay for a couple of days and then I noticed that he was forgetting some things that he shouldn't....which of his three children was oldest, my parents address, etc. I was told that it was more than likely some lasting effects of the anesthesia. Being a medical professional myself, I knew that was a possible culprit. . .but still there was something that nagged at me. Something wasn't right. Another day or so later and my father started to hallucinate, speaking to people who weren't there and thinking that I and my family members were nurses or doctors, asking us "Where's my family?" He was brought back to the hospital and it was suspected that he might have a UTI or another sort of infection.<br /><br />He did not.<br /><br />As a matter of fact, the doctors were unable to tell us why he was suddenly struck with such an altered state of consciousness. He soon lost his ability to swallow. on July 7th, 2016 he passed away at the age of 66 with my mother, my sisters and myself at his side. He was buried on my mother's birthday, four days before mine.<p></p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgzLX9uXJCrfY8OgPDBp-XxEvxpx24XZdGitNERIqT5aH5qedJyV5UiSADb7NVCQXVrLSoH8q6CJKwzrB9ezVtWLqAbliwq55pjaQ0oag7goROv1wwC9QfdC98XlV-4EQgMHERjyVs_ugz7oNygu6sfccjOoehYNxIVMbmiRWDkt_ZiTXEIcyznYVfwAA/s194/bandicam%202023-04-14%2009-41-30-069.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="192" data-original-width="194" height="192" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgzLX9uXJCrfY8OgPDBp-XxEvxpx24XZdGitNERIqT5aH5qedJyV5UiSADb7NVCQXVrLSoH8q6CJKwzrB9ezVtWLqAbliwq55pjaQ0oag7goROv1wwC9QfdC98XlV-4EQgMHERjyVs_ugz7oNygu6sfccjOoehYNxIVMbmiRWDkt_ZiTXEIcyznYVfwAA/s1600/bandicam%202023-04-14%2009-41-30-069.jpg" width="194" /></a></div>The next year, my wife and I moved out of our apartment in the city and bought a house in the country. We had my mother move in with us. She was getting sicker with her kidney disease and was soon to start dialysis. Her health continued to slowly decline until in January of 2020, I rushed to to the hospital for kidney and heart failure. The doctors told me they did not expect her to make the night. They were wrong. She did. Not only that, she survived heart surgery and was discharged just a week later. However, once again, I could immediately tell that something was wrong. Mom wasn't acting right. It was discovered that she had a stroke while she was on the surgery table. Her memory was shot and I watched as my mother deteriorated mentally. Her health took another turn when she started to become (what we thought) was severe anemia. It was actually MDS (Myelodysplastic Syndrome), which is a blood disease that acts as a sort of precursor to leukemia. So off we went to have tests done. Because Mom also was in ESRD (End Stage Renal Disease) she could not have chemotherapy or radiation to try and combat the growing disease inside of her. There was nothing to be done. <p></p><p>By this point, Mom's memory was pretty poor and every time I had to take her to the cancer center, we<br /> had to have the conversation about her disease and she'd look at me with fear in her eyes and ask me if she was dying. Even though I knew she couldn't remember, I could not lie to her. I must had that conversation with her no less than twenty times. Each time it ripped my heart out.</p><p>Mom's final three years were probably the hardest thing I've ever had to deal with. Constant heartbreak, constant sorrow and in between work...which as some of you know, I work as a 911 dispatcher. </p><p>My thoughts got pretty dark for a while. If it wasn't for the strength of my wife, I don't know how I would have gotten through it. She carried me through bouts of intense anger and rage at my inability to do anything to help my mother and bouts of profound sorrow the hopelessness of the situation. I cried into that woman's shoulder more times that I can count...but every single time she would pull me back out. I'm not a religious man, but if there are such things as angels she is surely one on the highest of them.</p><p>My mother passed away on July 31st, 2022 at the age of 73. She was surrounded by my sisters and I and all our spouses in her own bed at home.</p><p>At the age of 43, I have no living parents or grandparents. I was left feeling hollow and numb for quite a while, just going through the motions. Caregivers guilt kicked in and I still suffer from bouts of it today every now and then.</p><p>If you are still reading this, you should probably get some sort of award. Or at least a box of tissues because I'm sobbing right this minute, typing this. The words are just watery streaks in my vision. </p><p>So why? Why tell you all of this? Well, because honestly it's all part of why Midnight Cinephile is back!</p><p><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgmoG5EjU9mPQQNsFqCmaR3GtxPhBxMdgZCroBRrQwCtxkj_EvR03jjd0b2nGI3Ou8enKqsxCy-RN9Fj0Br_--F1CqX8-RnA5dhzCDpoqrJY5pDz54wmCxErFDulTah3sBUqMlARuADFlERVT7e94FqzWslvq_b1vY_CJeYlAMG60ixlHCtISrvGAB0YQ/s1239/1300238_xl.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; display: inline !important; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em; text-align: center;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1239" data-original-width="900" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgmoG5EjU9mPQQNsFqCmaR3GtxPhBxMdgZCroBRrQwCtxkj_EvR03jjd0b2nGI3Ou8enKqsxCy-RN9Fj0Br_--F1CqX8-RnA5dhzCDpoqrJY5pDz54wmCxErFDulTah3sBUqMlARuADFlERVT7e94FqzWslvq_b1vY_CJeYlAMG60ixlHCtISrvGAB0YQ/w290-h400/1300238_xl.jpg" width="290" /></a>It was around the beginning of the year. I was digging through an old box of horror magazines and I came across the issue of Fangoria that I had my first article in (Fangoria #332...with Scarlett Johansson on the cover) I thought about what that article meant to me and how it never would have happened without Midnight Cinephile. How many of my friendships with so many people both in and out of the horror and film industry were forged because of Midnight Cinephile.</p><p>At first I did not want to just reopen Midnight Cinephile. I wanted to do something fresh. Something new. Then I thought back to my attempts at podcasts. Those never seemed to pan out for one reason or another. I thought of my attempts at video game journalism. I thought about my attempts at writing horror fiction (which were not actually that bad....but I learned quickly I will never be a commercial author....even in the smaller arena of horror and weird fiction authors....my stuff was...shall we say....a bit more out there.) Again, I thought back to Midnight Cinephile and the off-shoots that arose from it: The Red Room, Tales From Beyond the Campfire and even Retro Game Fortress.....all of it....sprung from the seed that was Midnight Cinephile. </p><p>It was one final thought that cemented everything into place: My parents are gone. My childhood home is gone. There is almost nothing left of my past. I cannot go home again. </p><p>Except I can. Midnight Cinephile IS my home. It is my Elm Street. My Crystal Lake. This is my Haddonfield and THIS is the night that I come home.</p><p>And in THAT spirit, I've updated the artwork and such, but this is still the exact same place as it was seven years ago. </p><p>I'm excited to see where the iteration will take me. I have certainly grown in many ways in the past seven years. I think that I have much more to offer now than I did then. I truly hope that you will be as happy to be here as I am. If you are reading this, then you are friend and family and I want you to know how much I appreciate you taking even a moment out of your day to visit.</p><p>And so my friends, with a heart filled with love I welcome you all back to The Midnight Cinephile.</p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh8llAHRzNagY_EcoECKU5_ERKR67X3dlfmRIaTrtyg1pzvXcwMq79FFbreTIznRreZj-H21yG7Aa1v1rirw9a2-oKQg_RIoAP2JnnJ03MkiSa-9s4StbPMxHHasJtz23eD6FeOQcCLjhNlYcPkq74minqaa0JjtscAgmLf51KJgyUNWnzt7tFOB0KOsA/s400/d682a4c2-d1ec-421e-8b76-abdf292e512d_text.gif" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="225" data-original-width="400" height="360" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh8llAHRzNagY_EcoECKU5_ERKR67X3dlfmRIaTrtyg1pzvXcwMq79FFbreTIznRreZj-H21yG7Aa1v1rirw9a2-oKQg_RIoAP2JnnJ03MkiSa-9s4StbPMxHHasJtz23eD6FeOQcCLjhNlYcPkq74minqaa0JjtscAgmLf51KJgyUNWnzt7tFOB0KOsA/w640-h360/d682a4c2-d1ec-421e-8b76-abdf292e512d_text.gif" width="640" /></a></div><br /><p><br /></p><p><br /></p><p><a data-ved="2ahUKEwi5p_6euan-AhV7lYkEHd2WCksQFnoECAwQAQ" href="https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/myelodysplastic-syndrome/symptoms-causes/syc-20366977" ping="/url?sa=t&source=web&rct=j&url=https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/myelodysplastic-syndrome/symptoms-causes/syc-20366977&ved=2ahUKEwi5p_6euan-AhV7lYkEHd2WCksQFnoECAwQAQ" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.1); background-color: #202124; color: #8ab4f8; font-family: Roboto, arial, sans-serif; font-size: small; outline: 0px; text-decoration-line: none;"></a></p><br /><p><br /></p>Matthew St. Cyrhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07870183182967553900noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7632679281924009509.post-80643720727480336342016-04-04T21:49:00.000-04:002016-04-04T21:49:42.181-04:00Farewell My FriendsIt's been a long strange journey, but I'm sad to say that it's time that Midnight Cinephile came to it's end. I want to thank each and every one of you for being my constant readers these last seven years. This is not the end of my exploits, but rather a new beginning.....keep your eyes peeled for new projects coming at ya in 2016 and beyond!<br />
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Thank you for watching movies past the witching hour with me.<br />
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Love,<br />
MattMatthew St. Cyrhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07870183182967553900noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7632679281924009509.post-20757589087512736832016-03-10T00:46:00.001-05:002016-03-10T01:11:43.455-05:00Victor Frankenstein - Bringing Creepy Stuff to life for 200 Years!<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgtsUuUnGbbSiPlT930EEnWVEhyphenhyphenyP2BKj7WKEvq9hSijkfNHPd1O3AzAteHLs22RqGtzcIWEb2lYwlKsYRIAlRrSmsS53t_5mljXfcQx_P7ZB1xM7b5x2yE75DxjIWxw4nUpKRqQkeytySL/s1600/Victor+Frankenstein.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgtsUuUnGbbSiPlT930EEnWVEhyphenhyphenyP2BKj7WKEvq9hSijkfNHPd1O3AzAteHLs22RqGtzcIWEb2lYwlKsYRIAlRrSmsS53t_5mljXfcQx_P7ZB1xM7b5x2yE75DxjIWxw4nUpKRqQkeytySL/s400/Victor+Frankenstein.jpg" width="266" /></a></div>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><b><u>Victor Frankenstein</u></b></span><br />
<b><span style="font-size: large;">2015</span></b><br />
<b><span style="font-size: medium;">Paul McGuigan</span></b><br />
<b><span style="font-size: medium;"><span style="font-size: x-small;">Rated PG-13 - Approx. 110 Min</span></span></b><br />
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<b><span style="font-size: medium;"><u>Taglines:</u></span></b><br />
<i> - Meet your makers</i><br />
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<i> - Discover the origin of the monster and his creation.</i><br />
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<span style="font-weight: bold; text-decoration: underline;">Alternate Titles:</span><span style="font-size: medium;">Victor: The Secret History of Dr. Frankenstein</span><br />
<span style="font-size: medium;">Frankenstein</span><br />
<span style="font-size: medium;">Igor</span>
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<b><span style="font-size: large;"><i>"</i></span></b><span style="font-size: large;"><b><i>Igor, you and I shall be at the heart of a scientific enterprise that will change the world. We shall create life out of death!"</i></b></span><br />
<b><span style="font-size: large;"> -Victor Frankenstein </span></b><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjq9S47r1hHa_YJHNQgMu7iCjutppoAjIurUGDz5Pe1GQAVNdYoX382HJLFWOS_Qi0xNWeAID20IAIBZZOTVl6UIn92MlJUSwYLU4Q6AyIVhial9HdU3VJmk7QlEX6ot7TggwRDXSQ0zp6_/s1600/ScreenHunter_478+Mar.+07+15.31.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="268" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjq9S47r1hHa_YJHNQgMu7iCjutppoAjIurUGDz5Pe1GQAVNdYoX382HJLFWOS_Qi0xNWeAID20IAIBZZOTVl6UIn92MlJUSwYLU4Q6AyIVhial9HdU3VJmk7QlEX6ot7TggwRDXSQ0zp6_/s640/ScreenHunter_478+Mar.+07+15.31.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgbr7QcSE0DwtDF695gIxemMArvJbCojCgzctVvUTVTQJfrqzorWbxisHJkqhMYvQsYB9riTHRF9qR37TCWQOsPscOq3GtdyuXxt0MmaHvzmDce2TnqauIuB7eQmBmeV3vDnQFlPs8BJOEP/s1600/ScreenHunter_477+Mar.+07+15.30+-+Copy.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="133" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgbr7QcSE0DwtDF695gIxemMArvJbCojCgzctVvUTVTQJfrqzorWbxisHJkqhMYvQsYB9riTHRF9qR37TCWQOsPscOq3GtdyuXxt0MmaHvzmDce2TnqauIuB7eQmBmeV3vDnQFlPs8BJOEP/s320/ScreenHunter_477+Mar.+07+15.30+-+Copy.jpg" width="320" /></a>Once again, I find myself going to bat for a movie that was much maligned by critics and public alike, yet I found enjoyable. Victor Frankenstein is a new take on the nearly 200 year old novel by Mary Shelley and while it's certainly not going to end up on any "Best Of" lists, I found it to be an amusing and flashy Frankenstein romp.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjtGeajAIhjmwnJvbHNhBLWDSdY0YK6LQQlKk76FW4kxGDGstoO-2LvMGZYcFh0yhWQVbqop2X91wQ8qid2WH1GFO51BWxTsTMG3M4JyYHgdEmgtsr3yz0oJb47Ub3HqbJ0DwvHpLyKAmH1/s1600/ScreenHunter_477+Mar.+07+15.31.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="133" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjtGeajAIhjmwnJvbHNhBLWDSdY0YK6LQQlKk76FW4kxGDGstoO-2LvMGZYcFh0yhWQVbqop2X91wQ8qid2WH1GFO51BWxTsTMG3M4JyYHgdEmgtsr3yz0oJb47Ub3HqbJ0DwvHpLyKAmH1/s320/ScreenHunter_477+Mar.+07+15.31.jpg" width="320" /></a>Daniel Radcliffe's turn as Igor was exceptional and interestingly, I found his initial appearance in the circus to be a bit of an homage to the 1910 Edison version of The Frankenstein Monster. Whether or not it was intentional, I don't know...but it was the first thing that I thought of.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEghjD8STdDTK_NOqsbMrbQMnXCwocnuYzJdKp-jCHTdqYdqA6tUeCattRA2SfZWcfhv4z2ONmuWwOkKycnhGb3KzZVWp1nzhD5SAamGnS64fCNqPRXPLgvr42EMDY0MzNWuXmtO3uEVR8Ee/s1600/ScreenHunter_478+Mar.+07+15.32.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="134" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEghjD8STdDTK_NOqsbMrbQMnXCwocnuYzJdKp-jCHTdqYdqA6tUeCattRA2SfZWcfhv4z2ONmuWwOkKycnhGb3KzZVWp1nzhD5SAamGnS64fCNqPRXPLgvr42EMDY0MzNWuXmtO3uEVR8Ee/s320/ScreenHunter_478+Mar.+07+15.32.jpg" width="320" /></a>In this updated retelling of the legend, Frankenstein finds Igor working as a clown/physician at a traveling circus. When they first meet, he does not actually have a name. Frankenstein gives his new friend that name after rescuing him from his abusive employers. <br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEicOEEPWDGl1FN2wi8IvjZPbviwOfQXbsaBP82LhLVDM-rKISrgXF6QZKwN5mjXZIXOmSZ_Mdbuc6xrKfVsWW2NsnGrgWDUn-R_NVLFDLuj3UMExNjjvSOXfx6aTsD0F9dg_YNoy_48L42l/s1600/ScreenHunter_478+Mar.+07+15.33.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="134" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEicOEEPWDGl1FN2wi8IvjZPbviwOfQXbsaBP82LhLVDM-rKISrgXF6QZKwN5mjXZIXOmSZ_Mdbuc6xrKfVsWW2NsnGrgWDUn-R_NVLFDLuj3UMExNjjvSOXfx6aTsD0F9dg_YNoy_48L42l/s320/ScreenHunter_478+Mar.+07+15.33.jpg" width="320" /></a>There is a police inspector on their trail as well, due to the fact that their escape from the circus did not go exactly according to plan and some circus folk ended up dead and/or disabled. Such is the life of a mad scientist, eh?<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhtejY4uN5i84dpEc21Q-4QCHdJIflSGZrpbnZIViShe4fyMogVMEycDlTWFrv-H_UqcbCuYF-8dL7O19mzeSA9GoiryJviz_P8sc9-kamW6ProB_34aHd5eL_hafC5fGNe8i9AKwiUVN6y/s1600/ScreenHunter_478+Mar.+07+15.34.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="133" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhtejY4uN5i84dpEc21Q-4QCHdJIflSGZrpbnZIViShe4fyMogVMEycDlTWFrv-H_UqcbCuYF-8dL7O19mzeSA9GoiryJviz_P8sc9-kamW6ProB_34aHd5eL_hafC5fGNe8i9AKwiUVN6y/s320/ScreenHunter_478+Mar.+07+15.34.jpg" width="320" /></a>The pair retreat back to Frankenstein's laboratory, where the good doctor informs Igor that he is in fact, not actually a hunchback, but rather has a large cystic sack of fluid on his back that he proceeds to drain, followed by some rather unorthodox chiropractic procedure. After all is said and done, Igor is able to stand (mostly) straight with the help of a special harness. <br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiSiK6_iLV51Vr7Pbg5zDMMGUyyR9-jWrOcZyOtbvDoORwBrTDScEsiq71nmtDz4A2Fb2dwfE5pA6utiR6gDfWykTh2q3Tlh2bWCukk6bnsYl7XEUj8OcIAJkZa0R0vI1sDbUk3SblmdE-d/s1600/ScreenHunter_478+Mar.+07+15.35.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="133" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiSiK6_iLV51Vr7Pbg5zDMMGUyyR9-jWrOcZyOtbvDoORwBrTDScEsiq71nmtDz4A2Fb2dwfE5pA6utiR6gDfWykTh2q3Tlh2bWCukk6bnsYl7XEUj8OcIAJkZa0R0vI1sDbUk3SblmdE-d/s320/ScreenHunter_478+Mar.+07+15.35.jpg" width="320" /></a>I should probably back up a moment. The reason that rescues Igor from the circus is because he discovers that Igor has a brilliant mind and is quite skilled in medicine, having performed a dangerous and rapid medical procedure on a fallen trapeze artist with whom he is infatuated.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh5PtD1fMUVyAwy3eqwaakpTV8Ne5J-pgR2pY2-F3QJkF7_uAyjPtfY82Opc1UWK0xeC45HigASxbQ6fUQ093Tcl6bxph-_gtaeUCK7TyTN5fol_LeF6ey_m7SDOmfrSoWOaWWaso5CiXjC/s1600/ScreenHunter_480+Mar.+07+15.37.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="132" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh5PtD1fMUVyAwy3eqwaakpTV8Ne5J-pgR2pY2-F3QJkF7_uAyjPtfY82Opc1UWK0xeC45HigASxbQ6fUQ093Tcl6bxph-_gtaeUCK7TyTN5fol_LeF6ey_m7SDOmfrSoWOaWWaso5CiXjC/s320/ScreenHunter_480+Mar.+07+15.37.jpg" width="320" /></a><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgs7aoXZlVznssrPtz3yY4gEAU0EZ9xDZVVKHz9bc7WjmRAqKYlI0LmzyFaTKqQU66MZvx2t5RvA-q1LxY8L5Hy2DEYav4whHxxgcXBNJRwgoAQHWJPlSYOeybpyFlFS8xBPVrmrObYQcnc/s1600/ScreenHunter_479+Mar.+07+15.35.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"></a>Anyway, back at the lab, Frankenstein shows Igor the Lazarus Fork. A special device that when coupled with a solution of certain electrolytes, metals, blah-blah-pseudoscience, etc, can bring life back to dead tissue. He gives Igor and example with a pair of (I think) simian eyes. Igor is suitably impressed but informs the good doctor that he's screwed up the nerves which is why the eyes aren't moving in sync. Frankenstein begins bringing various organs to Igor piecemeal, having him work one organ at a time on his latest biggest experiment: Bringing and ape back to life.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiHwNYJd-A9OQ1ngKXEhtm_3m7kYB0COiUfMhFsmTzrnIC1mNqNF_UOaya_xFYGrlJFwIrSPJwOsg-EBkyVSw3I-fgoJx2pcDL3QcD84xEwsZQ_sMmdJUEkoVOgn3XudBJxSRAYtL7n1zCr/s1600/ScreenHunter_480+Mar.+07+15.38.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="134" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiHwNYJd-A9OQ1ngKXEhtm_3m7kYB0COiUfMhFsmTzrnIC1mNqNF_UOaya_xFYGrlJFwIrSPJwOsg-EBkyVSw3I-fgoJx2pcDL3QcD84xEwsZQ_sMmdJUEkoVOgn3XudBJxSRAYtL7n1zCr/s320/ScreenHunter_480+Mar.+07+15.38.jpg" width="320" /></a>First of all, this humunculus is one of the most disturbing little critters I have seen in my entire life. After a night out on the town drinking, Frankenstein brings Igor back to the lab and shows him what he's been working on on this time. Being the rash and impatient man that he is, Frankenstein immediately takes the ape to the University to show off his findings. Things predictably go a bit sideways, but none the less, he attracts the attention of a wealthy student there who agrees to fund his further project. Now armed with all the money he needs, Frankenstein sets off on creating a thinking, intelligent man.<br />
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To go further into the plot is to spoil the film and so I shall stop there. I will say that it was an interesting change to see the story through Igor's eyes. <br />
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While there are certainly some flaws in the film and it runs on the longer side, I never once found myself bored. The cinematography was beautiful and the special effects, though there was a lot of CGI was also excellent. The Frankenstein Monster is also very cool looking and probably one of my favorite designs. <br />
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<b><u>GORE </u></b><br />
For a Frankenstein flick, it's actually pretty light on the gore, though there are a few nasty little bits. The aforementioned eyes. The various organs and such.<br />
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<u style="font-weight: bold;">T&A </u><br />
Nope. PG-13 my friends.<br />
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<u style="font-weight: bold;">MONSTERS</u><br />
Damn straight! Frankenstein's Monster! Not to mention the little humunculus that rampages through the University. <br />
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<b><u>FINAL THOUGHTS</u></b><br />
I've got a serious soft spot (I seem to have a lot of those, don't I?) for the classic monsters. I couldn't even begin to tell you how many Frankenstein movies there are in existence, let alone TV shows, cartoons, comics, video games, books, etc. There is A LOT of Frankenstein out there. This is certainly not going to land on the list anywhere near the Universal classics or the Hammer films, but it's a damn sight better than the lackluster '94 Frankenstein with Robert De Niro as the Monster!<br />
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<b><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></b>Matthew St. Cyrhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07870183182967553900noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7632679281924009509.post-17331667496122746012016-03-08T00:25:00.001-05:002016-03-08T00:25:46.306-05:00Fantastic Four - Inter-Dimensional Travel Is Rough<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj62oyb94-1shZN2t8wmHL54fKo2IvmVJqCoejbRRDIV07ZMJdWw1QVyKLonPWbw7S-1nZmFsh8dFvhkkSHlB8kWlJMyebgQcr5HOJ7nXDpqaZC-QEJ2Hc0OQ5ceLsOWrek22ptjuTe6q_B/s1600/Fantastic+4.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj62oyb94-1shZN2t8wmHL54fKo2IvmVJqCoejbRRDIV07ZMJdWw1QVyKLonPWbw7S-1nZmFsh8dFvhkkSHlB8kWlJMyebgQcr5HOJ7nXDpqaZC-QEJ2Hc0OQ5ceLsOWrek22ptjuTe6q_B/s400/Fantastic+4.jpg" width="270" /></a></div>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><b><u>Fantastic Four</u></b></span><br />
<b><span style="font-size: large;">2015</span></b><br />
<b><span style="font-size: medium;">Josh Trank</span></b><b><span style="font-size: medium;"><span style="font-size: x-small;">Rated PG-13 - Approx 100 Min</span></span></b><br />
<b><span style="font-size: medium;"><span style="font-size: x-small;">Released August 7, 2015</span></span></b><br />
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<b><span style="font-size: medium;"><u>Taglines</u></span></b>
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<i> - Change is coming.</i><br />
<i> - When you change the world, prepare to defend it.</i><br />
<i> - Beyond darkness... beyond fear... lies the fantastic.</i><br />
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<b><span style="font-size: large;"></span></b><b><span style="font-size: medium;"><u>Alternate Titles</u></span></b><span style="font-size: medium;">Fant4astic</span><br />
<span style="font-size: medium;">Henry Street (False Working Title)</span>
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<b><span style="font-size: large;"><i>" I need a heat-resistant workshop, and a big-ass sunroof!"</i></span></b><br />
<b><span style="font-size: large;"><i> -Johnny Storm</i></span></b>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh_qaxrClRIMOsnItTmbeJ264DXv0knKe7pIuKaPOlgAJ67vW0NeuII-Fh_9wuHO2c59KpxSNMBSCTwiQT7Zj18KXmbvnQICZKj6D40JE-CyahLeSmigdF-Fk7F_HWKvA64gTCYLr3twbEA/s1600/ScreenHunter_477+Mar.+07+15.27.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="248" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh_qaxrClRIMOsnItTmbeJ264DXv0knKe7pIuKaPOlgAJ67vW0NeuII-Fh_9wuHO2c59KpxSNMBSCTwiQT7Zj18KXmbvnQICZKj6D40JE-CyahLeSmigdF-Fk7F_HWKvA64gTCYLr3twbEA/s640/ScreenHunter_477+Mar.+07+15.27.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg7QfnL3VLViCf9n6zJFl0ALNBIfAjtK2YGqCLUQarOrpjfxteP86pZ0E8TKPQbH52MV2qTL29AuxsV1kjjBg85sy_ytrlTPkUbhpxTre6PYQPvNS0zhED6GB3ExwRotiiL8pAPAfhc5wHY/s1600/ScreenHunter_475+Mar.+07+15.19.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; display: inline !important; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><img border="0" height="166" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg7QfnL3VLViCf9n6zJFl0ALNBIfAjtK2YGqCLUQarOrpjfxteP86pZ0E8TKPQbH52MV2qTL29AuxsV1kjjBg85sy_ytrlTPkUbhpxTre6PYQPvNS0zhED6GB3ExwRotiiL8pAPAfhc5wHY/s400/ScreenHunter_475+Mar.+07+15.19.jpg" width="400" /></a>I'd been putting off watching the Fantastic Four reboot after hearing a multitude of reports that the film was terrible. Then stories started coming out about the troubled production and the feud between Josh Trank and Fox. It did not bode well and it was looking like Fantastic Four was not going to be the reboot that I'd been hoping for.<br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEii5qsi3iEhKtDmi_Nx_xLNuC4qozI-ikpeM00hyHpclNZEg4iVQeF5HDEpLtUzvU_Bn2_ZzJBqbneakm3bZG8Wdgld8PybR-X9YoGH0jYbW2Lzcn3z107sXdE0h9qZN__gL7FA9nHOqsY_/s1600/ScreenHunter_475+Mar.+07+15.21.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="166" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEii5qsi3iEhKtDmi_Nx_xLNuC4qozI-ikpeM00hyHpclNZEg4iVQeF5HDEpLtUzvU_Bn2_ZzJBqbneakm3bZG8Wdgld8PybR-X9YoGH0jYbW2Lzcn3z107sXdE0h9qZN__gL7FA9nHOqsY_/s400/ScreenHunter_475+Mar.+07+15.21.jpg" width="400" /></a><br />
This weekend, I finally caved in after puttering around on Amazon Instant Video. I had just finished watching Victor Frankenstein (keep your eyes peeled for THAT review coming soon!) and was in the mood for something flashy. <br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh539NW3v0RsHImH90TU87z6akax3_5A9gaPBGW_caBRJCC5HVaTm3Es1o0EKc3lZODgukqTJE22i4D_QuSBgT0X79vl7Ynrx8CjGWp5XH8_7qKExpU-kafSN5JADwbJIBf9coqz74weLao/s1600/ScreenHunter_476+Mar.+07+15.21.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="166" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh539NW3v0RsHImH90TU87z6akax3_5A9gaPBGW_caBRJCC5HVaTm3Es1o0EKc3lZODgukqTJE22i4D_QuSBgT0X79vl7Ynrx8CjGWp5XH8_7qKExpU-kafSN5JADwbJIBf9coqz74weLao/s400/ScreenHunter_476+Mar.+07+15.21.jpg" width="400" /></a>And so with mild trepidation, I hit the 48 hour rental button. You know what? I'm glad I did, because Fantastic Four isn't nearly as bad as critics and keyboard cowboys would have you believe. Is it really, really good? Nope. But it also isn't really, really bad.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgsBE8a27bsNyZWOBwM4kPKB0hqoIGE7U3YTcc5J_5ZPH_-NmjecZq-LZVWkrffGnVKqYwfOqEAD6QIff2h8IOY99XRW7gwF9WBJ_VkiwO4Bk6pl6XF7CuySSEKztZCVmlKZZbYRmJX2JAZ/s1600/ScreenHunter_476+Mar.+07+15.22.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="166" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgsBE8a27bsNyZWOBwM4kPKB0hqoIGE7U3YTcc5J_5ZPH_-NmjecZq-LZVWkrffGnVKqYwfOqEAD6QIff2h8IOY99XRW7gwF9WBJ_VkiwO4Bk6pl6XF7CuySSEKztZCVmlKZZbYRmJX2JAZ/s400/ScreenHunter_476+Mar.+07+15.22.jpg" width="400" /></a>I think that one of the problems with the film is that it's another origin story. We already got one in the '05 version. Sure, I get it. It's a reboot so we need a new origin tale, but I think that it really should have only taken up maybe the first 20 minutes of the film and then let the heroes do what they do best.<br />
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Instead we meet Reed Richards and Ben Grimm when they're in the 5th grade. Then fast forward to high school and Reed being recruited by Dr. Franklin Storm and his adopted daughter Susan at the high school science fair. Reed goes to work for Baxter Laboratories and it turns out that he's perfected an inter-dimensional teleportation device that they themselves had been trying to work on for six years. <br />
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Victor Von Doom is a brilliant scientist who was formerly working on the project and has some attitude problems. Franklin brings Victor back in as well as his son, Johnny (who's basically being forced to work for the Doc as punishment for street racing.) and the team is complete.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjMQa5t5dRGJpHdQlUrxBxl-PmScMsIcljdco59EimkBkaxHwE6ywzQSX0lHAlSVXNEsj16uOp5RMo1CKTcW7HxD5NFxnoyHvkS0S3OcXV_4LSvXR3am6oHPQowDtaJpi4gt_wb7EGEpkqB/s1600/ScreenHunter_477+Mar.+07+15.24.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="167" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjMQa5t5dRGJpHdQlUrxBxl-PmScMsIcljdco59EimkBkaxHwE6ywzQSX0lHAlSVXNEsj16uOp5RMo1CKTcW7HxD5NFxnoyHvkS0S3OcXV_4LSvXR3am6oHPQowDtaJpi4gt_wb7EGEpkqB/s400/ScreenHunter_477+Mar.+07+15.24.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEji48NFH6si4dNqY_b0UfStHETmg5z78DL_ATUt6_hH6XeNkbYakgcZdNEmaCCDJsdpAmmommi4oOJtMzMQYqcXuxYoRqwm-m8qU-G-HW51SStJ_EAUGSMIatUv9lgA485qD6A3QOAK6PR8/s1600/ScreenHunter_477+Mar.+07+15.25.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="166" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEji48NFH6si4dNqY_b0UfStHETmg5z78DL_ATUt6_hH6XeNkbYakgcZdNEmaCCDJsdpAmmommi4oOJtMzMQYqcXuxYoRqwm-m8qU-G-HW51SStJ_EAUGSMIatUv9lgA485qD6A3QOAK6PR8/s400/ScreenHunter_477+Mar.+07+15.25.jpg" width="400" /></a>After successfully sending the inter-dimensional teleportation shuttle with a chimp passenger to another dimension and bringing it back, the big brass inform the team that they'll be taking over and giving the project to NASA. This does not sit well with the boys. Not wanting someone else to take the glory for all their hard work (can't say I really blame them) Reed, Victor and Johnny decide to take the shuttle to the other dimension themselves to at least put the first footprint there. Reed calls Ben and tells him that he won't go across without his best friend at his side. <br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh-5avksQIhBhVakQ_WcSy3nI6YV6LiAXOewPUTSCG779LhDewUYSUYjOsrMbvyY7wGmcBYklaq_xybRBzbuWDa_eMliFMCvuqq5mczAmNmIDLpJnQtGGdj-NJtAbY6VMTSufMHtVwmF0Y-/s1600/ScreenHunter_476+Mar.+07+15.24.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="166" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh-5avksQIhBhVakQ_WcSy3nI6YV6LiAXOewPUTSCG779LhDewUYSUYjOsrMbvyY7wGmcBYklaq_xybRBzbuWDa_eMliFMCvuqq5mczAmNmIDLpJnQtGGdj-NJtAbY6VMTSufMHtVwmF0Y-/s400/ScreenHunter_476+Mar.+07+15.24.jpg" width="400" /></a>As I'm sure you can imagine, shit goes sideways and fast! There's a strange green energy source the flows through the inter-dimensional planet (is it an alternate Earth? I dunno...) and the foursome accidentally unleashes the power. Victor falls down a cliff into a swirly green void of alien power and is presumed dead. The other three beat feet back to the shuttle as the green energy explodes all around them. <br />
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Sue is back in the lab trying to bring them back. Due to various mishaps occurring simultaneously each of them is imbued (yep, I just used the word IMBUED!) with different powers. Obviously you know who's who and what's what.<br />
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Obviously Victor isn't dead and returns when the team builds a new shuttle to try and find a way to reverse their conditions. Victor of course isn't Victor anymore, but now just calls himself DOOM. His design is actually pretty cool and a little on the creepy side. He's got some pretty wicked powers too...there's a neat scene where he's walking down the hall of the research lab pretty much blowing up peoples heads! <br />
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It all comes down to a final showdown in the other dimension. The Fantastic Four start learning to work as a team and naturally save Earth from a nasty end. <br />
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Had they allowed the team more time to coalesce and cut back on the origin stuff, it would have helped the movie out a great deal. The team is pretty much forced together and immediately go out after Doom after his blood hallway rampage. It felt very rushed.<br />
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Still the visuals were great. I think that this version of The Human Torch looks absolutely stunning. The Thing looks a lot better than the '05 version as well (let alone the '94 Roger Corman flick). It's really too bad that the reception to this film was so piss poor, because I wouldn't mind seeing what these versions of the characters could do as a fully formed team.<br />
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So if you've been on the fence about seeing Fantastic Four, take the plunge. It's far from perfect, but it certainly is not the catastrophe that others would have you believe.<br />
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<u style="font-weight: bold;">GORE</u><br />There's actually a bit of red stuff! The aforementioned head popping hallway scene kinda surprised me.<br /><br /><u style="font-weight: bold;">T&A</u><br />
Nope. Unless big naked rock monsters is your thing. In which case, you are a sick puppy.<br />
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<b><u>MONSTERS</u></b><br />
No real monsters, but we've got some creatures! The aforementioned Thing is a hulking rock beast and looks pretty badass. Doom is much more alien looking than previous incarnations with glowing green eyes.<br />
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<b><u>FINAL THOUGHTS </u></b><br />
The tone of the film is much, much darker than that of the '05 film. I think that may have also contributed to the backlash. It's certainly not going to be everyone's cup of tea, but if you're a fan of superhero or comic book movies then at least give it a shot.<br />
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<b><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></b>Matthew St. Cyrhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07870183182967553900noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7632679281924009509.post-67681116688644505712016-03-06T14:15:00.000-05:002016-03-06T14:15:34.348-05:00Unhinged - Slasher In The Old Dark House<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEirc8OrL4wozrNAGb24wITzur12xZVD0GnjHVC-WzOiEnbj7xJTG3aTm-sG1BsUCz1h2Gn66tF32YTDU1AGA1OOK3E4tSTNEShZCToET2QAQfaXzyrhLcQc-spKGQqE6sOxP7-Fiz2M5Qpl/s1600/Unhinged+VHS.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEirc8OrL4wozrNAGb24wITzur12xZVD0GnjHVC-WzOiEnbj7xJTG3aTm-sG1BsUCz1h2Gn66tF32YTDU1AGA1OOK3E4tSTNEShZCToET2QAQfaXzyrhLcQc-spKGQqE6sOxP7-Fiz2M5Qpl/s400/Unhinged+VHS.jpg" width="225" /></a></div>
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><b><u>Unhinged</u></b></span><br />
<b><span style="font-size: large;">1982</span></b><br />
<b>(D) Don Gronguist</b><br />
<b><span style="font-size: x-small;">Unrated - Approx 79 Min</span></b><br />
<b><span style="font-size: x-small;">Released October 15, 1982</span></b><br />
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<b><u>Taglines:</u></b><br />
<i> - The Nightmare Begins When You Wake Up</i><br />
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<i> - Get your slice from the reaper. Violence beyond reason, Victims beyond help.</i><br />
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<b><u>Alternate Titles:</u></b><br />
None<br />
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<b><i><span style="font-size: large;">"Don't give me that crap, Marion! A lot of really weird things are going on around here. Breathing, strange sounds, your Mother, now faces at the window. I can't stand it!"</span></i></b><br />
<b><i><span style="font-size: large;"> - Terry</span></i></b><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjVoCbcsCqJiyuikYqsca26s8lpFOTD7nu-sdOyFqRi_AJnNOvV2GtYyUrB2mH-F5MrdHR-qi974ZX38k3iULZfc89BQOemeIpCduztkJ4SI-0IjV9ibhu4gjm05O0Iy6aAGGILnlVcxP72/s1600/ScreenHunter_467+Mar.+06+14.04.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="515" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjVoCbcsCqJiyuikYqsca26s8lpFOTD7nu-sdOyFqRi_AJnNOvV2GtYyUrB2mH-F5MrdHR-qi974ZX38k3iULZfc89BQOemeIpCduztkJ4SI-0IjV9ibhu4gjm05O0Iy6aAGGILnlVcxP72/s640/ScreenHunter_467+Mar.+06+14.04.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEic4VXpMiUoLH5u0Kylu9ATXPlLR42qYS42eKQv3PVChpcNE6-4c5r-6V0ZljPoJl5MFqIJW-UAyVBv9_d6UqbhvMGk6Zq2BWaOwcyy1O7lKGtJSahN6f7SEiIi-VLLDUWRJfdFK8WKRKME/s1600/ScreenHunter_461+Mar.+06+13.50.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="244" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEic4VXpMiUoLH5u0Kylu9ATXPlLR42qYS42eKQv3PVChpcNE6-4c5r-6V0ZljPoJl5MFqIJW-UAyVBv9_d6UqbhvMGk6Zq2BWaOwcyy1O7lKGtJSahN6f7SEiIi-VLLDUWRJfdFK8WKRKME/s320/ScreenHunter_461+Mar.+06+13.50.jpg" width="320" /></a>I'm sure I've said it here before, but I'll say it again, many times I'm sure. There's nothing I love more than discovering a hidden gem, especially when when then seemingly come out of nowhere. I'd never heard of this film before and when I went to research the VHS cover art (figuring it would trigger a memory from video store days) I realized that I was onto something on the rarer side. <br />
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By the way the VHS artwork is pretty dang swanky. I love that The Reaper is holding a big bloody knife instead of a scythe. On the downside, the killer is not dressed as The Reaper....though someone is killed with a scythe while the killer is wearing a hooded raincoat, so I guess that's sort of Reaperish, right? Right. <br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj_pTh34LEXlL_LneezPh3rkOVeqj-Cb8mhnxhgfkJvXPQMGVRwM1rfio5EzyBw7Sv8Bdb6CYGNNQadjlIVN78d7txwrVlt5dXqcRM10s8bsmd3CTA3_vwS0g_edaoq7UKWPdqK1W1667d5/s1600/ScreenHunter_462+Mar.+06+13.52.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="242" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj_pTh34LEXlL_LneezPh3rkOVeqj-Cb8mhnxhgfkJvXPQMGVRwM1rfio5EzyBw7Sv8Bdb6CYGNNQadjlIVN78d7txwrVlt5dXqcRM10s8bsmd3CTA3_vwS0g_edaoq7UKWPdqK1W1667d5/s320/ScreenHunter_462+Mar.+06+13.52.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
The film follows three girls who get into a car crash on their way to a music festival. During the ride we hear a news report of two girls having gone missing from a nearby campground, adding to the growing list of disappearances in the region. After crashing their car en route, they are taken in by a woman named Marion and her mother who live in a big old creepy mansion. Two of the girls (Terry and Nancy) are only slightly banged up, however their friend Gloria is a bit more injured and is bed-bound. <br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgcyYnw-KXE9iuIL0vczbkS-GYE16tYSAulqW60yHzLVOjLWNL0oMjmoLQMNwD9ZvcNo0D9aMK4uaIRmZDWT48Xu5axK93XHzZX3l0f5Lx6J1KFaijwkS3GhJK5In-1rMDwA8p6ZlSrQLaS/s1600/ScreenHunter_462+Mar.+06+13.55.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="245" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgcyYnw-KXE9iuIL0vczbkS-GYE16tYSAulqW60yHzLVOjLWNL0oMjmoLQMNwD9ZvcNo0D9aMK4uaIRmZDWT48Xu5axK93XHzZX3l0f5Lx6J1KFaijwkS3GhJK5In-1rMDwA8p6ZlSrQLaS/s320/ScreenHunter_462+Mar.+06+13.55.jpg" width="320" /></a>Terry and Nancy attend dinner with Marion and her mother and discover that the matriarch of the family has some serious anger issues when it comes to her husband and men in general. She's also a pretty massive bitch to her daughter and all around just an old battle ax. after an uncomfortable meal, the girls play a game of dominoes in the sitting room while Marion plays the piano. Que heavy breathing and a shadowy figure spying on the girls from outside.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj9wfxfishHviTpWz7XZMSBt2CGoYZBRkOlS7ikbUvvijKpZnf6Bmxkn7XwM2p74cQWHpKhshRf4NAYE6JPz6OPhyyRYHtiTxLggWq4gn-uPG-cQuyYmLiFAdc7m_YS8NIAwV1Xpbnrui95/s1600/ScreenHunter_464+Mar.+06+13.56.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="244" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj9wfxfishHviTpWz7XZMSBt2CGoYZBRkOlS7ikbUvvijKpZnf6Bmxkn7XwM2p74cQWHpKhshRf4NAYE6JPz6OPhyyRYHtiTxLggWq4gn-uPG-cQuyYmLiFAdc7m_YS8NIAwV1Xpbnrui95/s320/ScreenHunter_464+Mar.+06+13.56.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj78umo4I0uBwEnY8eQ15Pm0XmySWjjmutx5fUbCjbxjAYqZ4a8j3Pop0l4IZuDc2b-sGuHL4p5LwodFFDBm3ly9gK8j7LCa8irQFslHe_X6oDgI_IAnLAa8sLfsAlomxz3T6zHzdloc7F8/s1600/ScreenHunter_464+Mar.+06+13.57.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="242" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj78umo4I0uBwEnY8eQ15Pm0XmySWjjmutx5fUbCjbxjAYqZ4a8j3Pop0l4IZuDc2b-sGuHL4p5LwodFFDBm3ly9gK8j7LCa8irQFslHe_X6oDgI_IAnLAa8sLfsAlomxz3T6zHzdloc7F8/s320/ScreenHunter_464+Mar.+06+13.57.jpg" width="320" /></a>With both Marion and her mother acting weird, the shadowy figure lurking around and the general uncomfortable ambiance the house gives off (not to mention a thunderstorm every single night!) it becomes abundantly clear that something is not right around here. The question is: Who is that shadowy figure? <br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiqADO038VrBCX6aQQqNE8k43MvjxQ5wQ2-2OS-l4Mwq2O6Jv6wFiDc0VKsKEhqnVDKIoCD-HhdpR5YwesMdbjUk9PMk7aS94442fFDUxs4xoH7Y4FTRHwmY1BOdeFXWxX1xlm4Wh7xtBik/s1600/ScreenHunter_465+Mar.+06+13.57.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="244" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiqADO038VrBCX6aQQqNE8k43MvjxQ5wQ2-2OS-l4Mwq2O6Jv6wFiDc0VKsKEhqnVDKIoCD-HhdpR5YwesMdbjUk9PMk7aS94442fFDUxs4xoH7Y4FTRHwmY1BOdeFXWxX1xlm4Wh7xtBik/s320/ScreenHunter_465+Mar.+06+13.57.jpg" width="320" /></a>According to Marion the roads are washed out and the only way into town is to hike two or three miles through the woods, but warns that gives that hiking isn't a very good idea because the "woods are dangerous..." Like we haven't heard THAT old chestnut before, eh? Despite the warnings, Nancy decides to head for town to at least call her parents to let them know what's happened. During the hike, Nancy is murdered by the aforementioned figure in a raincoat with a scythe, in a rare daytime slashing.<br />
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Who is behind the killings? What secrets are Marion and her mother holding? Why are there so many thunderstorms during October in Oregon? Some of those questions WILL be answered by the end of Unhinged, but you've gotta watch to find out!<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjyguqyAQTmnuZAmALsc9RgXteYlGXd5h-bJPejUFMQBZyjZ9cVDHqes5fgc7KbBuXXhMi1q9JRssJz2oFJxV5dh0mUZ586d41DfxHM-BmSLOdwUpCHmKbPxWs-wf5AK5_66y8lNKqVTEDi/s1600/ScreenHunter_465+Mar.+06+13.58.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="237" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjyguqyAQTmnuZAmALsc9RgXteYlGXd5h-bJPejUFMQBZyjZ9cVDHqes5fgc7KbBuXXhMi1q9JRssJz2oFJxV5dh0mUZ586d41DfxHM-BmSLOdwUpCHmKbPxWs-wf5AK5_66y8lNKqVTEDi/s320/ScreenHunter_465+Mar.+06+13.58.jpg" width="320" /></a>Now, I know that I just told you that this is a hidden gem of a slasher, but that comes with a bit of a disclaimer as well: This movie is not going to appeal to everyone. If you're a fan of early 80's slashers and you're expecting something on par with Friday the 13th, The Burning or Sleepaway Camp you're going to be disappointed. However, if you're a fan of low budget regional cinema and you're in the mood for a slower paced slasher, you'll be alright.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiPhgqM5G6c2tDeFM11zbVitb_QoGmfmc35lxD5GevwYLTyHSl1VDS41jbI1r7EeUgpk7ckMPEAeIbKC7zKKB2v5cEJFkoJRpboHLPwhYS-LgH8UMwYEoJ-qZ0BUnrePejmoycNU2PsU4vu/s1600/ScreenHunter_465+Mar.+06+14.00.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="244" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiPhgqM5G6c2tDeFM11zbVitb_QoGmfmc35lxD5GevwYLTyHSl1VDS41jbI1r7EeUgpk7ckMPEAeIbKC7zKKB2v5cEJFkoJRpboHLPwhYS-LgH8UMwYEoJ-qZ0BUnrePejmoycNU2PsU4vu/s320/ScreenHunter_465+Mar.+06+14.00.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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The acting is downright bad. Dialog is stilted and feels at times like it would be more at home in a live theatrical play than in film, but knowing that most of the cast and crew are local Oregonians (and the actress playing Marion (Janet Penner) comes from a theatrical background) I'm willing to bet that's where most have their experience. <br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEga3N8hKTVHFf248Npn-guDY8QzplJW-MpGomN9K_on0n4X0594VbV57XYLId5RUgGGAmoIosXhFYBJT7_s0uix8APdEWQWfnf0nZy6v8DqLOt-3O_5xoFxJNrXUv1UfBJc9BbP1_5oAFFI/s1600/ScreenHunter_466+Mar.+06+14.00.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="241" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEga3N8hKTVHFf248Npn-guDY8QzplJW-MpGomN9K_on0n4X0594VbV57XYLId5RUgGGAmoIosXhFYBJT7_s0uix8APdEWQWfnf0nZy6v8DqLOt-3O_5xoFxJNrXUv1UfBJc9BbP1_5oAFFI/s320/ScreenHunter_466+Mar.+06+14.00.jpg" width="320" /></a>Bad acting however, does not make a bad movie. When you take that bad acting and stilted dialog and combine it with a pretty rad electronic synth score (of course add a dash or two of nudity and gore) and you've got yourself a strangely atmospheric little flick that is definitely getting put into my regular rotation! <br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgArsyIghzO0EHU_gOGIyY6Om5iIUk9hQMBk3NZaa7MI-utMRl2rDfOPiK5IVdBb5F7bK3aAGtZpf8hd3OjXg2dVQFCdNhenakYWW28PI0r9hSKycg7eQt5hmQZ2YNSdA9QJi32TjXiac_z/s1600/ScreenHunter_466+Mar.+06+14.01.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="244" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgArsyIghzO0EHU_gOGIyY6Om5iIUk9hQMBk3NZaa7MI-utMRl2rDfOPiK5IVdBb5F7bK3aAGtZpf8hd3OjXg2dVQFCdNhenakYWW28PI0r9hSKycg7eQt5hmQZ2YNSdA9QJi32TjXiac_z/s320/ScreenHunter_466+Mar.+06+14.01.jpg" width="320" /></a>If you go out and get the DVD, a word of warning: DO NOT listen to the so called "Comedy Commentary" provided on the DVD. It is nothing more than some MST3K wannabe's ripping the film apart in the most unfunny and juvenile ways. I couldn't listen to more than 15 minutes of it before I turned it off.<br />
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Also provided as an extra is a local TV interview with writer/director Don Gronquist and star Janet Penner. It is quite possibly one of the most awkward and uncomfortable interviews I have seen in recent memory. Gronquist looks like he was very nervous and frequently freezes and takes long pauses in his answers, often times not making much sense. I felt really bad for the guy.<br />
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<u style="font-weight: bold;">GORE </u><br />While it's not gratuitous, there is some decent gore on display here. The aforementioned scythe slashing is just the start. There's also an ax murder and a pretty brutal machete murder as well. <br /><br /><u style="font-weight: bold;">T&A </u><br />Why yes indeed! We get to see Terry and Nancy take a shower. Well, actually we get to see Terry take two showers! Watch out for some serious 80's bush! <br /><br /><u style="font-weight: bold;">MONSTERS</u><br />
A mysterious figure slashing up pretty young nubile girls!<br />
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<b><u>FINAL THOUGHTS</u></b><br />
Unhinged has a certain vibe to it that I really enjoyed. It reminded me of when I was just out of high school. Still living at home with Mom & Dad. I worked at my beloved Video Paradise and also delivering for Domino's Pizza. Sundays were my only day off, so on Saturday nights, I would take out four or five movies from the video store and watch them all day Sunday. I've got many fond memories of rainy Sunday afternoons watching weird old slashers in my room, with a bag of Doritos and a bottle of Dr. Pepper. Ahhhh, those were the days!<br />
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<br />Matthew St. Cyrhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07870183182967553900noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7632679281924009509.post-64397835155696942812016-03-04T22:49:00.000-05:002016-03-04T22:49:27.833-05:00Color Me Blood Red - Bleeding For Your Art<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<span style="font-size: x-large;"><b><u>Color Me Blood Red</u></b></span><br />
<b><span style="font-size: large;">1965</span></b><br />
<b>H.G. Lewis</b><br />
<b><span style="font-size: x-small;">Unrated - Approx 79 Min.</span></b><br />
<b><span style="font-size: xx-small;">Released October 13, 1965</span></b><br />
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<b><u>Taglines:</u></b><br />
<i> - Not for the eyes and ears of anyone under 16 years!</i><br />
<i> - A Blood-Splattered Study in the Macabre</i><br />
<i> - Drenched in Crimson Color</i><br />
<i> - Fiendish is the word for it!</i><br />
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<i> - A Blood-Splattered Study in the Macabre. It Will Leave You AGHAST!</i><br />
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<b><u>Alternate Titles:</u></b><br />
<b><i>Color Me Red - Working Title</i></b><br />
<b><i>Model Massacre - Alternate Title</i></b><br />
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<b><i><span style="font-size: large;">"Holy Bananas! It's a girls leg!!!!!"</span></i></b><br />
<b><i><span style="font-size: large;"> - Jack</span></i></b><br />
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Once again, I find myself in highly nostalgic territory. Color Me Blood Red is another film that haunted my youth in the form of lurid VHS cover art that lined the aisles of my beloved Video Paradise. Just looking at the image of the VHS box art brings back the smell of must and popcorn that permeated that small mom & pop store and my heart swells. When I was but knee high to a cacti, I found this particular tape to be highly disturbing. The girl, chained to the wall with her innards being drained into a bowl gave me nightmares on more than one occasion and the film built itself up into near legendary status in my young mind.<br />
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Unfortunately the store's copy of the tape went missing (or broke) before I started working there in high school, and I missed my chance to watch it. Fast forward twenty or so years and I'm standing in my vast cinema dungeon looking for something to watch while I whittle away the late evening hours. My eyes fall upon the Something Weird issued DVD of the film and I realize that I've owned the movie for several years and never watched it. Such is the way of the Midnight Cinephile. So many films, so little time.<br />
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With a stiff cocktail in hand and a bowl of mixed nuts (though I'd kill for a giant plate of pizza rolls, I'm eating healthier these days) I settle in to my reclining throne and let the crimson goodness wash over me. I found myself giddy with anticipation as the film started. Thirty years of buildup to near mythic status was surely going to come crashing down and disappoint me, right? Well.....no, actually.<br />
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Having seen H.G. Lewis' other films in advance I had a good idea what I was in for and I've got to tell you that I was not disappointed in the least. Wonky acting? Check. Melted crayon blood? Check. Hilariously bonkers dialog? Check! What the hell else do you want?<br />
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I suppose you could look at Color Me Blood Red as a loose remake of the 1959 cult schlocker A Bucket of Blood, exchanging plaster covered corpses for paintings soaked in the blood of a crazed artist's hapless victims. <br />
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Artist Adam Sorg finds himself in a bit of a slump and after accidentally getting blood on one of his paintings in progress, he realizes that the blood is exactly what the painting needs. He starts slicing his fingers open with a razor blade and feverishly painting with the exsanguinated plasma until his fingers pretty much run dry. The next day as his girlfriend nags him about how he's going to finish the painting without bleeding himself dry, he stabs her in the face and uses her blood to finish his painting. Well that escalated quickly!<br />
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After a local critic and patron at the Farnsworth Art Gallery swoon over his completed gory masterpiece, it's not long at all before Adam is slaughtering beach-goers outside his beach house. The second girl he murders is actually the one so prominently featured on the VHS cover. The scene is actually fairly hilarious as Adam runs out of blood, goes into the next room and "milks" her entrails like an udder to get more blood! <br />
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Color Me Blood Red is the final film in Lewis' Blood Trilogy and it is decidedly lighter on gore than Blood Feast and Two Thousand Maniacs, I think.....but the gore that's there is top notch melted crayon style that I find particularly pleasing to the eye. <br />
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So, did it reach the mythic status that I had it built up to? Hell no, but it was still a hell of a good time and I'm glad that I finally got to see it. I think I may have to watch the Blood Trilogy in a mini marathon sometime soon.<br />
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<b><u>GORE</u></b><br />
There's a fair amount of the red stuff. As mentioned already, not as much as the other two Blood flicks, but still a good amount. That melted crayon grue never gets old for me!<br />
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<b><u>T&A</u></b><br />
No nudity here, friends, but we are treated to several buxom sixties babes in their bathing suits!<br />
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<b><u>MONSTERS</u></b><br />
One blood crazed artist!<br />
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<b><u>FINAL THOUGHTS</u></b><br />
There's a lot to love on this one: Bright, colorful cinematography, wonky characters and some really bonkers dialog make this a fun, quick flick. If you're into H.G. Lewis, then definitely check this one out.....since it's short, you should just watch it with the other two Blood films!<br />
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Matthew St. Cyrhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07870183182967553900noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7632679281924009509.post-70825881077084170962016-03-02T15:35:00.001-05:002016-03-02T15:35:39.909-05:00Far From Home - Trailer Park Psycho's In Love<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<span style="font-size: x-large;"><b><u>Far From Home</u></b></span><br />
<b><span style="font-size: large;">1989</span></b><br />
<b>D: Meiert Avis</b><br />
<b>W: Theodore Gershuny , Tommy Lee Wallace </b><br />
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<b>S: Matt Frewer, Drew Barrymore, Richard Masur </b><br />
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<b><u>Taglines:</u></b><br />
<i> - There is no one you can trust...least of all the one who loves you.</i><br />
<i> - Growing up can be murder.</i><br />
<i> - One boy wants her love. One boy wants her dead.</i><br />
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<i> - On the other side of innocence lies fear.</i><br />
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<b><u>Alternate Titles:</u></b><br />
Germany - Lolita Kill<br />
West Germany -Wilder Sand<br />
Finland - Nightmare in the Desert<br />
France - Bad Meetings<br />
Greece - Seduction and Rape<br />
Hungary - Desert Serial Killer<br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><b><i>"My first and last night in Banco, Nevada....probably the shittiest place in the whole world."</i></b></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><b><i> -Joleen</i></b></span><br />
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It wasn't a very good day yesterday. Nothing terrible happened, really, it just wasn't my day. So after the Mrs. turned in for the night I decided that I'd settle in with some cocktails and catch up on some of my DVR. After watching a couple episodes of Freddy's Nightmares (thanks to the El Rey Network!) I came across this flick, which I had completely forgotten that I recorded a while back. What a pleasant surprise!<br />
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First off, what a great cast! Drew Barrymore! Matt (Max Headroom) Frewer, Richard (The Thing) Masur, Susan (Big Top Pee-Wee) Tyrell, Dick (Gremlins) Miller & Jennifer (Bride of Chucky) Tilly just to name some! I mean, come on, that's pretty damn good!<br />
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Joleen (Barrymore) and her father Charlie (Frewer) are returning home to Los Angeles after a cross country vacation. They run out of gas and end up stranded in the small desert trailer park town of Banco, Nevada. Seems the gas delivery truck is running late and nobody in town has any gas to spare or sell. Duckett (Masur) is the eccentric, but helpful gas station/repairman who is anti-government and no longer worships the mighty dollar, helping people simply because it's the right thing to do.<br />
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Chalie rents a trailer for the night and that's when things start going south. Joleen meets Jimmy, who is a rather intensely angsty teen (played by Andras Jones...who played Rick in Nightmare on Elm Street 4: The Dream Master! Man this flick is full of peeps!) who clearly is interested (probably a bit TOO) in her. Jimmy has one hell of an attitude problem, which of course 14 year old Joleen finds attractive.<br />
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After settling in and going for a swim in the surprisingly clean trailer park swimming pool, Joleen meets another boy named Pinky who seems to be the complete opposite of Jimmy. <br />
Ooh, rival action for Joleen's affection! <br />
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That night Jimmy's mother is murdered via an electric fan in her bathtub. Jimmy (being a complete dick) is of course our prime suspect. The next day, Jimmy takes Joleen to a car junk yard and then swimming in a pond where he tries to rape her. Pinky comes to the rescue however and they hide out in an old abandoned apartment building that Pinky uses as his hideout.<br />
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I'm not going to go any further into the plot because I'm not a spoiling kinda guy. There are more murders, however and it becomes evident that there is a psychopathic killer loose in the park and no one is safe. I was quite surprised by the film and enjoyed it quite a bit. It's a tight little thriller with a heck of a cast, so check it out!<br />
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<u style="font-weight: bold;">GORE</u><br />There's a little bit of blood here and there, but not a whole lot. <br /><br /><u style="font-weight: bold;">T&A</u><br />
There's a little bit of T&A on display during a raunchy little sex scene between two trailer park residents as Joleen is looking through their window. <br />
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<b><u>MONSTERS</u></b><br />
One psychotic killer on the loose!<br />
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<b><u>FINAL THOUGHTS</u></b><br />
I really don't know how this one managed to slip by me because this definitely looked like something that my sister and I would have rented back in the day....or would have seen on HBO late at night. At any rate, it's a great flick with a great cast. <br />
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<b><u><br /></u></b>Matthew St. Cyrhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07870183182967553900noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7632679281924009509.post-66689444033251271312016-01-18T01:17:00.000-05:002016-01-21T01:13:29.026-05:00Candy Stripers - Give 'Em Some Sugar, Baby<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<u><strong><span style="font-size: x-large;">Candy Stripers</span></strong></u></div>
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<strong><span style="font-size: large;">2006</span></strong></div>
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<strong><em>aka Species XXX;</em></strong></div>
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<strong><em>Hospital Macabro</em></strong></div>
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<strong>Windchill Films/Snowfall Films</strong></div>
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<strong><em>Approx. 89 min - Rated R</em></strong></div>
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I've had Candy Stripers in my Netflix DVD queue for about 10 years or so. It's always been hovering around somewhere around the middle of the queue as other movies came and went. It sort of became invisible to me, I think. Well, that was rectified this past week when it showed up in my mailbox. </div>
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It was the first "modern" movie I've watched in probably two weeks, what with being on my VHS binge and all. </div>
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I don't want to say that I had high hopes for the film, after all it's about aliens disguised at nurses sucking the life out of men, but I had hoped that it would have at least lived up to it's premise. Sure it's got a bevy of somewhat attractive women in candy strip uniforms. Sure there are aliens. Sure they invaded a small town hospital and started to cocoon men with alien sex. Sounds good doesn't it? Yes. Yes it does. It's execution however, is pretty damn lackluster. </div>
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There's still some fun to be had here if you're in the mood for a b-movie. </div>
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A trio of basketball players end up in the hospital after getting into a scrape with the opposing team. Apparently a broken leg or a fractured wrist is enough to get you admitted in this town. I don't even know what was wrong with the third guy. He was in a wheelchair and then he wasn't. Seemed totally fine after that. Oh well.</div>
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Well, this coincides with aliens invading the hospital. They take over the bodies of females via the mouth. Usually an infected female will transfer alien essence (or something like that) to another female by trying to get them to kiss her. When their mouths get close a nasty green slimy tentacle thing comes out of the infected girls mouth and into the other. The newly infected nurse will shimmy and shake for a moment and then become an alien. I guess that's a fairly effective method to spread the alien essence.</div>
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The alien nurses are completely addicted to sugar, scarfing down anything sugary that they can get their hands on: candy bars, donuts or even just sucking down sugar packets. After the get all hopped up on sugar they roam the hospital looking for unsuspecting men to screw into a cocoon. Literally. They wrap them in sugary cocoons. Poor bastards.</div>
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I'm not certain what the alien's endgame is. It might be just to populate the planet with their own kind. They also give birth to nasty little larva (that basically look like red slug things) and keep a tentacle thing in the basement that spits out a green sugary substance. That's really the most I got out of it. They screw/cocoon the men (presumably for food) and infect the women. I suppose if you really dug down deep you could come up with some sociopolitical meaning to the film about the battle of the sexes or something, but that's way over my pay grade.</div>
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The acting is about what you'd expect from a Syfy Channel made movie...and to be honest aside from a few boobs here and there, this very well could have been. A few quick edits would make this perfectly okay for TV broadcast. Which was one of the highly disappointing things. If you're going to make and R rated movie about killer alien nurses that fuck guys to death, you might want to really deliver on the goods. The T&A factor is surprisingly low. </div>
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There's a few bits of gore, but the rest of the special effects are really pretty terrible. Once our hero's figure out how to stop the growing alien horde and start fighting back, the candy striper deaths are some of the most ridiculous computer effects I've ever seen. Pretty much all that happens is their faces distort with terrible CGI (not even distort into an alien face....just basically wiggle around). It was quite laughable and just about anything would have been better than that effect. </div>
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<u><strong>GORE:</strong></u></div>
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As I mentioned before there are a few good gore gags: A man gets his heart ripped out and another guy gets his junk bitten off. Plus there's all the cocooning and such.</div>
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<u><strong>T&A:</strong></u></div>
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There are some boobs, but not as many as you would think!</div>
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<u><strong>MONSTERS:</strong></u></div>
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For the most part the aliens strictly take the form of buxom nurses. Sometimes they have a weird scaly arm or something. At one point a nurse peels off her human face to reveal a reptilian visage below. There's also the green tentacle thing that comes out of the nurse's mouths as well as the red baby slug things that they vomit up. </div>
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<u><strong>FINAL THOUGHTS:</strong></u></div>
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This is definitely a "check your brain at the door" movie. If you can get past the wonky acting and questionable logic, there's some fun to be had here. Just don't overthink things and you'll be okay!</div>
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<br />Matthew St. Cyrhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07870183182967553900noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7632679281924009509.post-23085108760460617232016-01-16T23:44:00.001-05:002016-01-16T23:44:53.783-05:00Analog Time Machine Part I - Shadow Theater!<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
Honestly, I wasn't planning on doing another entry in the Analog Time Machine series so soon, but as I was digging through my ancient stack of VHS tapes, I came across one that filled me with a giddy excitement I haven't felt in a long time. The tape in question, a hodgpodge that includes NBC's Sunday Night Movie presentation of Top Gun, David Copperfield's Niagra Fall's Special among other strange and wonderful delights.</div>
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I very well may come back to this tape to look at some of these artifacts of a time gone by, but the thing that I really wanted to talk about tonight is a short lived movie clip show that aired on USA called Shadow Theater. I don't think it even lasted a full season there were maybe five or six episodes. It's hard to say though because this show isn't even listed in IMDb! Shyea! It's THAT rare! So, dear reader, you are in for a special treat here, because for the first time (I think pretty much in the history of the internet) you are going to get a full review of the premier episode, complete with the original commercials that ran with it in 1990! If that isn't reason enough to jump in with a brand new Analog Time Machine, I don't know what is! Let's get cracking!</div>
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<b><u>The USA Logo</u></b></div>
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A long time ago, on a TV that utilized cathode rays to function, this was a very common sight. See back in the 80's and 90's USA was one of THE cable channels to keep an eye on for all your horror movie needs. Shows like Night Flight, Commander USA's Groovy Movies, Up All Night and Saturday Nightmares kept us horror hounds coming back week after week for our dose to the macabre. It makes me sad to look at the state of the channel now. All reruns of CSI: Miami and Burn Notice. Boo.<br />
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When I think of my formative years, nothing ignites my nostalgia quite like USA does. Sure there were other channels that aired great genre programming, but USA had by far the widest variety, I think. Don't get me wrong, I love TNT's MonsterVision, early Sci-Fi Channel as well as the weirdness that would pop up on various other stations, but it was USA that consistently had the goods.<br />
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<u><b>Shadow Theater!</b></u></div>
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Ah, Shadow Theater. The opening of the show was a great montage of clips from tons of different horror movies. I'm pretty sure I can name most of the films, but there are a few I'm not sure on. That may be a follow up segment. Anyway, it's a fantastic opening, suitably creepy with some great atmospheric organ rock music while Robert Englund narrates the opening prose. <br />
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<u><b>It's Robert Englund!</b></u><br />
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When we first join Robert, he's standing on his chair and yelling at an off-screen dog named Hitchcock to get back. I guess Hitchcock is a large rowdy dog. We never get to see him, so we'll never know. That's kinda the schtick on this episode. After Hitchcock backs off (I guess) Robert gets down off his chair and introduces himself and informs us that when he starred in the latest film adaptation of The Phantom of the Opera, they moved the location from Paris to London and as such we'd be taking a look at some films that also take place there. We're advised to stick around. Guess it's commercial time already!<br />
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<b><u>The Marshall Chronicles</u></b><br />
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First up, an add for one of ABC's new sitcoms called The Marshall Chronicles. I'll be honest, I remember this commercial very well, but I don't think I ever watched the show. The commercial is fairly amusing though. See, Marshall here is informing us of how he stacks up against Doogie Howser, M.D. (See first photo). In case you're wondering what the naked women thing is....Marshall is telling us how Dr. Howser gets to examine naked women all day while he himself is lonely. You know, now that I think about it...I highly doubt you'd see mention of naked women on a sitcom commercial these days. Oh how times change.<br />
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<b><u>No Sweat! By Revlon</u></b><br />
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NO SWEAT! By Revlon. It's anti-perspiration and odor control at it's most aggressive. Or so this commercial would have me believe. While extremely fit men and women work out in front of a multitude of brightly colored backgrounds, we're informed that No Sweat will give us a burst of deodorization and keep us dry when we need it most. The chiseled beautiful people stare intently at the screen and inform us that it's "No sweat." I mean, the colors are cool and all, but I kinda miss teenage Denise Richards trying to sell me Secret deodorant. Cause it's strong enough for me, but PH balanced for a woman. By the way, that is true. As a married man, I can attest to the fact that Secret is, in fact, strong enough for me, yet PH balanced for my lovely wife. <br />
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<b><u>Ford Aerostar</u></b><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhAcczORR494xrqQTVrvNBTaulJhFaaWIXS9l0vST8hTFiNApSGizio0KJiqWrN4-kurmX8wJBTJWxE4eQge4_r4M3FR_D-B1GrYuAAuLy3VQX4TpHrhQ8C3FbZTKUV7UfohVeNXq6oELKO/s1600/ScreenHunter_445+Jan.+15+14.52.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="486" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhAcczORR494xrqQTVrvNBTaulJhFaaWIXS9l0vST8hTFiNApSGizio0KJiqWrN4-kurmX8wJBTJWxE4eQge4_r4M3FR_D-B1GrYuAAuLy3VQX4TpHrhQ8C3FbZTKUV7UfohVeNXq6oELKO/s640/ScreenHunter_445+Jan.+15+14.52.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiYqWJKYnxQ_x5YJBktjadlxstuIAX7rt2eETdkaBoTvrjk-hURqWhTN-Xvu1IcSP8b4zgf5yhYECwyifSstHYvqFW48N7g68SM2xYw-rZf3bC6U2-TukO4JDcKV1NGx1HUPomKeMu0r06P/s1600/ScreenHunter_445+Jan.+15+14.53.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="488" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiYqWJKYnxQ_x5YJBktjadlxstuIAX7rt2eETdkaBoTvrjk-hURqWhTN-Xvu1IcSP8b4zgf5yhYECwyifSstHYvqFW48N7g68SM2xYw-rZf3bC6U2-TukO4JDcKV1NGx1HUPomKeMu0r06P/s640/ScreenHunter_445+Jan.+15+14.53.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
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The Ford Aerostar. Minivan of choice for Soccer Mom's in the late 80's/early 90's. My family never owned a minivan, but if this commercial is to be believed the Aerostar appears to be in direct competition with the Chevy Lumina APV Minivan. As a side note, my father did have a Chevy Lumina Sedan. Nice car Wonky shocks. Totally going off subject here. Anyway, being that my experience with minvans is precisely zilch, we'll just suffice to say that as far as car commercials go, this one wasn't bad.<br />
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<b><u>Greensweep!</u></b><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiqYA9YxUUuwbxvsvAJ5mHoq0EWrh5yZWB7FXQidxahpEGfo6e-mhTdBVyhjSjtEeBr5BEqJoxntSwdxOmkjfdBz14momZdShZMgZbOGp_b0ZVoBZFLnnCf-uW2JK6baZJeJtBlc0HFy_-G/s1600/ScreenHunter_445+Jan.+15+14.54.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="486" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiqYA9YxUUuwbxvsvAJ5mHoq0EWrh5yZWB7FXQidxahpEGfo6e-mhTdBVyhjSjtEeBr5BEqJoxntSwdxOmkjfdBz14momZdShZMgZbOGp_b0ZVoBZFLnnCf-uW2JK6baZJeJtBlc0HFy_-G/s640/ScreenHunter_445+Jan.+15+14.54.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjESBmWFv4NH98piFExh9CBfgySWGUg12fzq7te585N5x5rDM64PRsFVQhukVLGeZiKMLB7wXvOTDwa5QD6XabFN5ktRPfDXTCP4pqlkKHJPDYeW72d0eWMPn-nw_c1-L4IbnE1uzORQYYX/s1600/ScreenHunter_446+Jan.+15+14.54.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="488" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjESBmWFv4NH98piFExh9CBfgySWGUg12fzq7te585N5x5rDM64PRsFVQhukVLGeZiKMLB7wXvOTDwa5QD6XabFN5ktRPfDXTCP4pqlkKHJPDYeW72d0eWMPn-nw_c1-L4IbnE1uzORQYYX/s640/ScreenHunter_446+Jan.+15+14.54.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
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I've never had much of a green thumb. Beyond that, living in either condo's or apartments, I've never owned my own lawn, so I can't say that I understand the struggle of proper lawn maintenance. I imagine that if I DID have my own lawn, I would be quite proud of it and I would want to keep it lush and green. I hate complicated crap though. So, I can tell you that I would definitely use Greensweep. It looks nice and easy and this fella looks like he's having a grand old time dancing around while watering and fertilizing the lawn. Unlike his neighbor there, who looks like he's having an absolutely miserable time with cumbersome bags and a roller thingy and other unwieldy shit that looks like a major pain in the nads. No thank you. I'll be a Greensweep guy with my imaginary lawn, thank you very much!<br />
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<b><u>USA SATURDAY NIGHTMARES PRESENTS LASERBLAST!!!!!!!</u></b><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgKyPCet7DzuljJPQIB3CFYJ9zjE42nQ83b_4iSfpW3RGPWpbmO1x_5e76V0Yrhkp-eaIBWmUkMkjJYkezD1CuBCAH_Bcb2HdtMFSAe4AVG2JPcVm3N1GzrZlPa2EfWtj02hn7dwuWonl-5/s1600/ScreenHunter_447+Jan.+15+14.55.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="490" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgKyPCet7DzuljJPQIB3CFYJ9zjE42nQ83b_4iSfpW3RGPWpbmO1x_5e76V0Yrhkp-eaIBWmUkMkjJYkezD1CuBCAH_Bcb2HdtMFSAe4AVG2JPcVm3N1GzrZlPa2EfWtj02hn7dwuWonl-5/s640/ScreenHunter_447+Jan.+15+14.55.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjMA43ewW2BYUWxNRCl5ei0t04qnJu-V0d-dwomQBtcLw_1Y-72GFC9c5t8gi6iK6S7u38pP-82_3eSnOCKFfTAw0NPpwBsUMlPRYY5UshPkB2Kg-4xX8CsC7ZyJTq9dYoOTebTqmnM1G-f/s1600/ScreenHunter_447+Jan.+15+14.56.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="486" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjMA43ewW2BYUWxNRCl5ei0t04qnJu-V0d-dwomQBtcLw_1Y-72GFC9c5t8gi6iK6S7u38pP-82_3eSnOCKFfTAw0NPpwBsUMlPRYY5UshPkB2Kg-4xX8CsC7ZyJTq9dYoOTebTqmnM1G-f/s640/ScreenHunter_447+Jan.+15+14.56.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
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OH MY GOD! What an awesome bonus this is! First of all, Laserblast is an awesomely bad sci-fi movie from the 70's that I freaking love. Secondly, SATURDAY NIGHTMARES! YES! Man, this caught me right in the cockles deep down in my heart. I have fond memories of watching Laserblast on Saturday Nightmares and on Up All Night! If I remember correctly, it was one of the weekends that I spent at my aunt's house. I must have been around eleven or twelve. I'm sure I've mentioned before that I used to occasionally spend a weekend at my aunt's house. We'd stay up late watching horror movies and eating garlic bread with apple jelly! HEY! Don't knock it until you've tried it, damnit! It's the food of the Gods!<br />
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Anyway, I remember one Saturday night we were watching some old movie she had taped off TV....I want to say that it was The Indestructible Man, with Lon Chaney Jr. It was around quarter after eleven and her roomate called saying that her car was broken down and she was stranded at her job (I think she worked in a factory type place). Anyway, my aunt didn't want to drag me out into the cold so she told me to stay put. Off she went and the whole place was mine for about an hour and a half or so. I came across Laserblast on Up All Night. I was at once captivated by the stop motion aliens and also highly disturbed by Billy's appearance when he turned all green and started blowing shit up. It was a very weird feeling, being all alone at night away from home and watching this weird flick. My aunt got home with her roomate just after it ended. I'll never forget that night.<br />
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Just seeing this movie all grainy and stuff on VHS, I'm highly considering finding a copy of Laserblast on VHS. Sure, I've got it on DVD.....but it just isn't the same. I want the analog pop and hiss. I want the tactile feel that brings me back to that night 25 or so years ago. <br />
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You can expect to hear FAR more about Saturday Nightmares, Up All Night and the like in the future. I've created a nostalgia monster of myself. <br />
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<b><u>The Take</u></b><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjfVgzSt14HHZOfaLoREhMGtNclhfCf18UfvmXQrg4dchqysgOrMC4kJBgCGlwTNkwd_YT-2XT3KzG-UQczaObTcUtdND_TKS5mZqhYznQCR4ZrBm_KyvV7VNxAvdTz-VJeHe3fPMVJuUKr/s1600/ScreenHunter_448+Jan.+15+14.56.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="482" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjfVgzSt14HHZOfaLoREhMGtNclhfCf18UfvmXQrg4dchqysgOrMC4kJBgCGlwTNkwd_YT-2XT3KzG-UQczaObTcUtdND_TKS5mZqhYznQCR4ZrBm_KyvV7VNxAvdTz-VJeHe3fPMVJuUKr/s640/ScreenHunter_448+Jan.+15+14.56.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjKcEGmYig1NgXf7jbtcebSIKSoLrV8nzIawzWMuHScUtVc41WxksDqPwt7r2ErYPrZDtSZSt5_iw7py-dujRfZNKJUlx00ryp7Hj3JlTGsYqro2VZR8J-_SCy1un3OK1hEZ8vZ_fNydV_A/s1600/ScreenHunter_449+Jan.+15+14.56.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="484" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjKcEGmYig1NgXf7jbtcebSIKSoLrV8nzIawzWMuHScUtVc41WxksDqPwt7r2ErYPrZDtSZSt5_iw7py-dujRfZNKJUlx00ryp7Hj3JlTGsYqro2VZR8J-_SCy1un3OK1hEZ8vZ_fNydV_A/s640/ScreenHunter_449+Jan.+15+14.56.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
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I never saw The Take. It was a made-for-cable movie according to IMDb, however it looks like it also got a video release. I think I'm going to have to check it out, because it actually sounds pretty awesome. The gist is that a corrupt Miami cop goes to prison, gets out and ends up involved in the Florida drug trade, the Cuban mafia and a briefcase full of cocaine! Sounds like a good time to me. Plus it's a made-for-TV movie from 1990...so you KNOW it's going to be cheesy as hell! I'll let you know when I hunt down a copy, cause you can count on a review!<br />
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<u><b>Viewer Discrection is Advise!</b></u><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiVIZ_zCzZyWvDYMxQbNfq_VhVBVEA5CAv5MjyxRY1oO6mWodZe3uZwiD61-3MxAcH8F1MhNLLol8wtHVs_iHmMCq0dUmZ5yE2dSi4VJY-wjvX6loDQy1QTkLFEQlUqirVKcHt-Rwi6uvW3/s1600/ScreenHunter_450+Jan.+15+14.56.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="482" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiVIZ_zCzZyWvDYMxQbNfq_VhVBVEA5CAv5MjyxRY1oO6mWodZe3uZwiD61-3MxAcH8F1MhNLLol8wtHVs_iHmMCq0dUmZ5yE2dSi4VJY-wjvX6loDQy1QTkLFEQlUqirVKcHt-Rwi6uvW3/s640/ScreenHunter_450+Jan.+15+14.56.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
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Even something as simple as a Viewer Discretion screen was so much more vibrant and amazing in the 80's and 90's. These days, we get a black screen with white lettering. We get the TV rating system. There was no TV rating system back in the day. The only warning you had that you were gonna see some serious shit was a warning such as this one. Also, they didn't just SHOW the warning. Creepy announcer guy read the warning to you. You know....just in case you were really paying attention or something. <br />
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<u><b><strike>Freddy's</strike> Robert's Back!</b></u><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiACj3mR_r0-N0vohELABJLaveEwvvDYM2I7TlnGJbdQod7GL17hGL3kxKqzZ9Nt8nWxnKjPUAWUbBza4uQH1zBXYwhzcbFwFhyphenhyphenC9J-yJmUMYe-TTp1OlbE5039pnP6RYHPwLXTmYJOXmeu/s1600/ScreenHunter_450+Jan.+15+14.57.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="484" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiACj3mR_r0-N0vohELABJLaveEwvvDYM2I7TlnGJbdQod7GL17hGL3kxKqzZ9Nt8nWxnKjPUAWUbBza4uQH1zBXYwhzcbFwFhyphenhyphenC9J-yJmUMYe-TTp1OlbE5039pnP6RYHPwLXTmYJOXmeu/s640/ScreenHunter_450+Jan.+15+14.57.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgZDMadkE4p114CLrVS9PE5BrvYhsq5_Zvlk5Xs6msnwQAnMNUHJHkFXmqEn4KOwi5AsyOLeE3uXnQkiXiq8qffL8HUfk99Qr7gY2ez6VaJEP3sDiXpxeDHjPIsdx1HPUP5InadCoOtNZFr/s1600/ScreenHunter_450+Jan.+15+14.58.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="482" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgZDMadkE4p114CLrVS9PE5BrvYhsq5_Zvlk5Xs6msnwQAnMNUHJHkFXmqEn4KOwi5AsyOLeE3uXnQkiXiq8qffL8HUfk99Qr7gY2ez6VaJEP3sDiXpxeDHjPIsdx1HPUP5InadCoOtNZFr/s640/ScreenHunter_450+Jan.+15+14.58.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
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As we rejoin Robert, he's found a nice colorful beach ball for Hitchcock to play with. He tosses the ball off screen and sooner than you can say "How sweet! Fresh meat!", the shredded ball is flying back at Robert and he catches it. Looks like Hitchcock is going to need some sturdier toys!<br />
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We are now introduced to our first clip segment, which include Halloween, Hellraiser (and Hellbound) as well as A Nightmare on Elm Street. We're treated to a pretty sweet Freddy bit before the clips start too!<br />
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<b><u>Halloween</u></b><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhSCJaCna4ZmgwJLV7BIvL-5o8XRVeFG8spC3bmmcV0hNraHxpk_xVpPRpSt0QmrpNhvAE0R_Bjjjny46dDoqj__o08-dOQ6FSvO2IBo9dSJ9dTFXJSl5axDJG4-S-vku3F6ghJb6x_tSMp/s1600/ScreenHunter_450+Jan.+15+14.59.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="484" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhSCJaCna4ZmgwJLV7BIvL-5o8XRVeFG8spC3bmmcV0hNraHxpk_xVpPRpSt0QmrpNhvAE0R_Bjjjny46dDoqj__o08-dOQ6FSvO2IBo9dSJ9dTFXJSl5axDJG4-S-vku3F6ghJb6x_tSMp/s640/ScreenHunter_450+Jan.+15+14.59.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg_8OAQDWcPjDSv9CrrjEcPEfGboeCUZdwcq8OL1ZsKiEl8I3e7X8eKa42LB7_c9UHYwtTppgya84kA-9pbm7auV7hoT9XrEPNafV2dx4fp1nzjcQLiS3JhAA8I4d6Bs8BR4StipJv1MWZB/s1600/ScreenHunter_451+Jan.+15+15.01.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="486" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg_8OAQDWcPjDSv9CrrjEcPEfGboeCUZdwcq8OL1ZsKiEl8I3e7X8eKa42LB7_c9UHYwtTppgya84kA-9pbm7auV7hoT9XrEPNafV2dx4fp1nzjcQLiS3JhAA8I4d6Bs8BR4StipJv1MWZB/s640/ScreenHunter_451+Jan.+15+15.01.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
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First up we see some clips from Halloween as the narrator (which is not Robert Englund) remarks about how Halloween changed the horror filmscape forever. We get a few interview clips with John Carpenter as well, who likens the film to a western. <br />
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This was my very first exposure to Halloween and the scenes utterly terrified and thrilled me. I don't know exactly how long it was after seeing this that I finally got to watch Halloween for the first time, but I believe it was at least a couple of years. When I finally did get to see the film, I remember being very excited every time a scene that appeared on Shadow Theater would come up in the film. <br />
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<u><b>Hellraiser & Hellbound: Hellraiser II</b></u><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhCzPawRsd_iTDf8I7GSERyPn0H5669P1vpf5Bmj3SLrXfkqQ_wH8g6AXdqG0Z-7_7otAKY8B1kSzRFAyJ4iodnhOS0CpXAwZ9TiympvxGkQQXkJk_qH3m8pQKyZldZ_nA17XRHz0ByqdiH/s1600/ScreenHunter_451+Jan.+15+14.59.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="482" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhCzPawRsd_iTDf8I7GSERyPn0H5669P1vpf5Bmj3SLrXfkqQ_wH8g6AXdqG0Z-7_7otAKY8B1kSzRFAyJ4iodnhOS0CpXAwZ9TiympvxGkQQXkJk_qH3m8pQKyZldZ_nA17XRHz0ByqdiH/s640/ScreenHunter_451+Jan.+15+14.59.jpg" width="640" /></a><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgUuA2O6Pm_wkonv1cGkn2Ve8zsbplqMmXlHSYribDugWmECBh41WjGW8o8oLglOIW2qWx29sk11fRaFt5S7Ags5GXgDnTIR5dGYxNlboiW4URmDrPKT-MpRJOWGdYvAu4OAvLQ_2yA8eXK/s1600/ScreenHunter_451+Jan.+15+15.02.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="484" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgUuA2O6Pm_wkonv1cGkn2Ve8zsbplqMmXlHSYribDugWmECBh41WjGW8o8oLglOIW2qWx29sk11fRaFt5S7Ags5GXgDnTIR5dGYxNlboiW4URmDrPKT-MpRJOWGdYvAu4OAvLQ_2yA8eXK/s640/ScreenHunter_451+Jan.+15+15.02.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
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Next up we're whisked away to meet the Cenobites in Clive Barker's Hellraiser. These scenes really freaked me out when I was younger and the narrators commentary about heightened levels of pleasure and pain really confused and upset me. My young mind was completely incapable of understanding how these two polar opposites could be intertwined or connected, but something about the concept absolutely terrified me. <br />
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I didn't actually see Hellraiser (or any of it's sequels) until I started working for Video Paradise, though I was familiar with the series thanks to this show as well as Fangoria and GoreZone magazines. As a matter of fact, my very first issue of Fango covered Hellraiser III...so I was well versed in the concept before actually seeing any of the films. On top of that, I actually started with Hellbound: Hellraiser II and then say the first film. It was an absolute revelation for me at the time and I became an devout fan not only of the Hellraiser series (even the less than good sequels) but of Clive Barker as well.<br />
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<strong><u>A Nightmare on Elm Street</u></strong></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgTzBUn9wqRmGiRE4aHi00mv7pOHnOg4pTwVFDHLdDol4U6EaZjGbPMsNcL4cbiK_KnPx0avNBm2wP6mDp9-7sF4m6lae2KDB1-x_b1z4eTe473gzshrk1UfsfEiEamM0Am8KHuAXApS8Ka/s1600/ScreenHunter_451+Jan.+15+15.05.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="486" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgTzBUn9wqRmGiRE4aHi00mv7pOHnOg4pTwVFDHLdDol4U6EaZjGbPMsNcL4cbiK_KnPx0avNBm2wP6mDp9-7sF4m6lae2KDB1-x_b1z4eTe473gzshrk1UfsfEiEamM0Am8KHuAXApS8Ka/s640/ScreenHunter_451+Jan.+15+15.05.jpg" width="640" /></a><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhRyUoxKDuuedDRarA0GjxOg_YD5hBLHimji5xKsvn5hmTJYQoBrNTtX1Hz1Bk1VwTPKeQE8XbZzipYkpGfYjjUvYKAAqZ2QH72n_CxGrk-9Y3DfgcRFT4Lp69PPlZV1gKS3QNhzgjEHEKU/s1600/ScreenHunter_451+Jan.+15+15.06.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="481" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhRyUoxKDuuedDRarA0GjxOg_YD5hBLHimji5xKsvn5hmTJYQoBrNTtX1Hz1Bk1VwTPKeQE8XbZzipYkpGfYjjUvYKAAqZ2QH72n_CxGrk-9Y3DfgcRFT4Lp69PPlZV1gKS3QNhzgjEHEKU/s640/ScreenHunter_451+Jan.+15+15.06.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
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If you've been a reader of Midnight Cinephile for a while or listened to the podcast, then you'll know that A Nightmare on Elm Street was the first horror film that I really cut my teeth on at a pretty early age thanks to my sister and my cousin. It truly started me on the path that I have followed....and in a way lead to me starting Midnight Cinephile. So, thanks, AnnMarie!</div>
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What can I possibly say about NOES that hasn't been said before about a gazillion times? If you haven't seen it, then do so immediately. You won't be disappointed. Unless you don't like horror movies. But if you don't like horror movies, why the heck are you reading this right now? Weirdo.</div>
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<strong><u>Hitchcock Don't Like Being Groomed</u></strong></div>
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And we're back with Robert. He enters from the right side of the screen looking more than a bit disheveled. He informs us that Hitchcock can be a bit of a baby when it comes to getting groomed. It's a quick segment and before you know it we're into more commercials.</div>
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<strong><u>The First Power Trailer</u></strong></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEizJY7r97jb0X3CFKoiPPkllZyLayyHE86xLCh5EtEVPgrn2tV91NPTiVvjyKIyKuVa0nsUv3CxrO2xZSanh50soWH9eWVKDAIW41c4mcUuvgASCTYb42BpmVuizS3aC91DZmXAgNzkcKa4/s1600/ScreenHunter_451+Jan.+15+15.08.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="484" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEizJY7r97jb0X3CFKoiPPkllZyLayyHE86xLCh5EtEVPgrn2tV91NPTiVvjyKIyKuVa0nsUv3CxrO2xZSanh50soWH9eWVKDAIW41c4mcUuvgASCTYb42BpmVuizS3aC91DZmXAgNzkcKa4/s640/ScreenHunter_451+Jan.+15+15.08.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgFoQV80Or8hO7EjvCMBAHQlqT_7UCBsu_hiHIOMaOfC037BylGxjsV7XnlelMUvcdMVllehRGl5YluAIIpd5Aic9Gi5ECp7EUtPj5Yvn_LH-OzKcyVSpShyphenhyphenvOQZZDv1US2hcHyvQ5L5cf5/s1600/ScreenHunter_451+Jan.+15+15.09.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="481" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgFoQV80Or8hO7EjvCMBAHQlqT_7UCBsu_hiHIOMaOfC037BylGxjsV7XnlelMUvcdMVllehRGl5YluAIIpd5Aic9Gi5ECp7EUtPj5Yvn_LH-OzKcyVSpShyphenhyphenvOQZZDv1US2hcHyvQ5L5cf5/s640/ScreenHunter_451+Jan.+15+15.09.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
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Oh man, I totally forgot about this movie! The trailer is freakin' awesome. Mr. Creepy Announcer tells us that since the dawn of time, Satan has worked to create the perfect killer. Que the first image. HOLY CRAP! Mr Creepy Announcer tells us that he was created to kill many, without reason. Cut to The Killer walking down a hallway using what appears to be a ceiling fan as a spinning weapon of death. HOLY CRAP! Mr Creepy Announcer tells us to be warned because this man exists today. Cut to crazy action sequences. WHOA! The trailer used to kinda creep me out, so I'm downright shocked that I didn't seek it out before. This movie looks bad ass and I can't believe that I've never seen it. Luckily a quick jump over to Amazon and $11 dollars later, the DVD is en route to Castle Cinephile as we speak. So you can bet on a review coming up within the next week or so. </div>
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<u><strong>The Pizza Hut Lover's Collection</strong></u></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgyfiCD1O4FnQmdx7khyphenhyphen8P3Xx5JatyiFKnuyhP1d1V4MVt_gCfXJf1RxEdJ841zb1nCYSDLW68EtyYDZub9dlulxHBO7JJheqIPfYQuEXlpLQjLz6_e1SlcqpuOTYbralnuRLJL8e1pXhaD/s1600/ScreenHunter_452+Jan.+15+15.10.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="484" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgyfiCD1O4FnQmdx7khyphenhyphen8P3Xx5JatyiFKnuyhP1d1V4MVt_gCfXJf1RxEdJ841zb1nCYSDLW68EtyYDZub9dlulxHBO7JJheqIPfYQuEXlpLQjLz6_e1SlcqpuOTYbralnuRLJL8e1pXhaD/s640/ScreenHunter_452+Jan.+15+15.10.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
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Man, oh man. Who doesn't love Pizza Hut? I grew up in a house that loved Domino's Pizza....but for a period in the early 90's Domino's changed their sauce or something because we stopped liking it for a while and that's when we started ordering Pizza Hut. It became my preferred pizza after that....despite the fact that I then went to work for Domino's Pizza in the late 90's (Still one of the best jobs I ever had. I mean seriously. They paid me to drive around and listen to my radio. How cool is that! Plus I lived in college town so on the weekends I made CRAZY amounts of tips.). Anyway, I'm totally getting way off topic here. Which surprises no one, I'm sure.</div>
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Pizza Hut's Lover's Collection (Meat, Cheese, Pepperoni) were the best damn pizzas on the planet as far as I was concerned. My favorite was always the Pepperoni Lover's Pizza. Don't get me wrong. I love all kindsa meat, but when it comes to my pizza, I prefer to keep it simple. Extra cheese. Extra Pepperoni. It's a thing of beauty. </div>
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Damnit, now I really want a pizza.</div>
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<u><strong>J&B's Grille</strong></u></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEirD6-MRfwOCN5axdjqhbJXvoyza97L3kKiJhLy5x-lIOkjQ6wvDrMqnNFO4NnLBZIA0WdDZv0RuCaedcjD1n18LO7-8koQFD1VbMnMSKA3KubFBj8RoYw8xWd6sJw9GgfT-WzKTsHlmTo4/s1600/ScreenHunter_453+Jan.+15+15.11.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEirD6-MRfwOCN5axdjqhbJXvoyza97L3kKiJhLy5x-lIOkjQ6wvDrMqnNFO4NnLBZIA0WdDZv0RuCaedcjD1n18LO7-8koQFD1VbMnMSKA3KubFBj8RoYw8xWd6sJw9GgfT-WzKTsHlmTo4/s640/ScreenHunter_453+Jan.+15+15.11.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
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J&B's Grille in Townsend, MA! Growing up, my Godparents lived in Townsend and I can remember going here a few times. As I recall they had really good crab cakes and clam chowder. It's kinda funny watching this commercial because they way they shot it, you would never guess that this restaurant is right smack dab in the middle of a shopping plaza. There's a McDonald's to the right. Stop & Shop behind it and several other stores all around. Used to be a Mom & Pop video store in that plaza too, I think it was called Country Video.</div>
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The restaurant is still there, though now it's called Bailey's Bar & Grille and I was actually there in December. Still looks exactly the same on the outside. I think it still looks pretty much the same on the inside as well. Sadly, they did not have crab cakes anymore. But they did have a delicious roast beef with cranberry chutney and mashed potatoes! If you are looking for fine family dining and you are in north central Massachusetts, JB's/Bailey's is definitely a good option. </div>
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<u><strong>Armando's Menswear</strong></u> </div>
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Oh boy. If you want to get a look at men's fashions in 1990 (at least in central Massachusetts) look no further than this commercial for Armando's. Mullets and mustaches are the order of the day here. Along with bright colors, bizarre patters and a whole lot of GQ posing from these fellas. As a matter of fact, most of the commercial consists of these guys shaking hands, high fiving, giving the "Hey There!" gun-finger-move", or just standing around pretending to have an important conversation while showing off all the latest that 1990 had to offer. </div>
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Armando's is also still there! I drive by it every now and then whilst doing errands and such. Never paid much attention to it until this commercial popped up. I just may have to go in there one of these days just to see what it's like. Maybe they've still got a bright yellow sports jacket in the back from 1990. I could rock that like nobodies business!</div>
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<u><strong>Snack time for Hitchcock</strong></u></div>
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And we're back with Robert. He's got a nice big juicy lamb chop for Hitchcock. What a lucky dog! Immediately after tossing the chop off screen, a clean picked bones flies back at him. Wow, that dog can eat! Apparently, Hitchcock is just a puppy. So he needs his protein. </div>
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It's now time to take a look at the films set in London, as promised at the beginning of the show. Robert tells us to keep our eyes peeled during the American Werewolf in London segment for John Landis to come crashing through a window! That was one of the first "easter eggs" in a horror movie I learned about.</div>
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<u><strong>An American Werewolf in London</strong></u></div>
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An American Werewolf in London is another film that I saw fairly early on....probably not long after I saw Shadow Theater. I was in middle school, Seventh Grade I think, and American Werewolf played on WLVI (Channel 56) on the 8 O'clock Movie. The thing I remember most from that first viewing was talking about it with my best friend the next day at school We both thought the scene in the porno theater was hilarious....what with a heavily decomposed Jack talking with David. Jack had no lips left, yet was able to still perfect articulate his words while his teeth gnashed up and down. Don't ask me why, but we thought that was freakin' hilarious. </div>
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<u><strong>Waxworks</strong></u></div>
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Waxworks is a film that I don't think I saw until much later on....probably after high school even. If I remember correctly I found a double feature DVD of Waxworks and Waxworks II in the bargain bin at a music store called Strawberries. I think I may have rented Waxworks II back in the day, because I remember it seemed awful familiar to me when I watched it on the DVD. The Mummy scene shown on Shadow Theater is one of the weaker sequences in the film, I think....though it's still pretty bad ass. </div>
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<u><strong>Lifeforce</strong></u></div>
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I saw Lifeforce (well part of it anyway) on WPIX (which we oddly picked up out of New York) when they ran their Shocktober programming in October. It was a heavily edited cut (obviously) but I was completely enthralled by the vibe of the movie. It was like a cross between Alien and Dracula with a healthy dose of the 80's sprinkled in. Years later, I would finally see the uncut film on DVD and was completely obsessed with Mathilda May. I can't imagine why. </div>
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<u><strong>Obedience With Silver Bullets</strong></u></div>
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We rejoin Robert as he's loading a gun with silver bullets. "There's only one way to train a dog like Hitchcock," he says. "Silver bullets! Just like the kind we used on the Count!" Wait. What? When the hell did anyone use silver bullets on Count Dracula? I mean, I know that Dracula (and vampires in general) have an aversion to silver, but I can't seem to recall anyone ever defeating Dracula with silver bullets. If anyone out there knows of a film (or book) where this occurs, let me know! I'm genuinely curious to see/read it. </div>
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What happens from here, I have no idea because my jackass younger self decided to choose right here to start recording The Monster Squad off HBO. What a dick. Sure, it's a cool movie, but I recorded over other episodes of Shadow Theater. WHY GOD?!?!? WHY!??!?!?? Man, if I could go back in time, I would bitch smack myself and instill the importance of preserving what I had recorded. </div>
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Never the less, this was one incredible journey. In roughly thirty minutes I was able to travel back in time twenty-six years and revisited a lot of great memories. I hope that you've enjoyed this as much as I have.</div>
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And for the love of God, if anyone out there has more episodes of Shadow Theater, please contanct me ASAP!</div>
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Until next time, </div>
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Stay Spooky!</div>
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-Matt</div>
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<br />Matthew St. Cyrhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07870183182967553900noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7632679281924009509.post-78259228197562352722016-01-13T02:18:00.000-05:002016-01-13T02:18:58.769-05:00Vicious Vignettes - The Open Window<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg3R37vvK_6FxdxoBsbzdEUM0WzGyCkw-eSEL-4tTxJ3QoiiF7h8zNymcV3F7eLozbHTniJhI91lqOQG_RzOVNkFkIvI2ANmWTDDXnj0ymsIjAL88L9NJQ2ePczXjhvFYW9TrQZtX0MvlGU/s1600/ScreenHunter_431+Jan.+11+15.49.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="222" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg3R37vvK_6FxdxoBsbzdEUM0WzGyCkw-eSEL-4tTxJ3QoiiF7h8zNymcV3F7eLozbHTniJhI91lqOQG_RzOVNkFkIvI2ANmWTDDXnj0ymsIjAL88L9NJQ2ePczXjhvFYW9TrQZtX0MvlGU/s320/ScreenHunter_431+Jan.+11+15.49.jpg" width="320" /></a>Tonight I thought I would turn my attention onto something a bit different. Tonight I want to look at a short film that made the rounds back in the 80's and even possibly early 90's. Cable channels like USA would often show short films to fill space when a movie ran short and such....especially on shows like Saturday Nightmares or Up All Night. They were often strange little shorts heavy on atmosphere and light on plot and that suits me just fine.</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhc10p3mIpMtz5AG3qHdfyJJUIOC9C2S6bxabWvSNiNWQQBvWobkLsvg2dy_I8r8Ukvd8R_UolrgyacwfzUkjaPX67U0yXa7klhq51uZ6UcAeFcLQEal18bCP8Klgeq6P6myMoJSLTF32g9/s1600/ScreenHunter_432+Jan.+11+15.49.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="224" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhc10p3mIpMtz5AG3qHdfyJJUIOC9C2S6bxabWvSNiNWQQBvWobkLsvg2dy_I8r8Ukvd8R_UolrgyacwfzUkjaPX67U0yXa7klhq51uZ6UcAeFcLQEal18bCP8Klgeq6P6myMoJSLTF32g9/s320/ScreenHunter_432+Jan.+11+15.49.jpg" width="320" /></a>Tonight's offering is a take on the classic short story by Saki (H.H. Munro) published in his 1914 book of short stories, Beasts and Super-Beasts. The story revolves a man named Framton Nuttle (!) who is out in the country on doctors orders. See, Mr Nuttle has a nervous condition and needs rest and relaxation to calm them. His sister sends him to the house of Mrs. Sappleton to stay. There he can repair his frazzled nerves while still remaining socially active to a point.</div>
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Upon arrival, Mr Nuttle is met at the door by Mrs. Sappleton's 15 year old neice, Vera. She takes him into a back room with a large french windows. While they wait for Mrs. Sappleton to come down, Vera tells Framton of her Aunt's tragedy (her words not mine). </div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhG0oTjyWbcF7mE810zx3mOFk0RVfSaJDVJrtZMjs7IxK2bSoe4_DXNteV5-5QXcAqS9h-9cI6yn787vC2l9EaQvS6rHXy-2tR4CSqyZm9PnLXMyxuGSBph6zHa28b76zSA8jAYd-bTDwht/s1600/ScreenHunter_432+Jan.+11+15.50.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="138" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhG0oTjyWbcF7mE810zx3mOFk0RVfSaJDVJrtZMjs7IxK2bSoe4_DXNteV5-5QXcAqS9h-9cI6yn787vC2l9EaQvS6rHXy-2tR4CSqyZm9PnLXMyxuGSBph6zHa28b76zSA8jAYd-bTDwht/s200/ScreenHunter_432+Jan.+11+15.50.jpg" width="200" /></a><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhsUpBWa3VpVQjznGHdIs_2VUmUr7q88-P1UqCl12JOQM3n0niVC_B8TrDjZOZE-hOvUpnHosWR5mqdDGHvcBDtQPFR_34GpA1CG61nTG2tohmxl3jxEXO0EmF9omYlBJfn_QHXzvdTzuvt/s1600/ScreenHunter_433+Jan.+11+15.50.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="137" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhsUpBWa3VpVQjznGHdIs_2VUmUr7q88-P1UqCl12JOQM3n0niVC_B8TrDjZOZE-hOvUpnHosWR5mqdDGHvcBDtQPFR_34GpA1CG61nTG2tohmxl3jxEXO0EmF9omYlBJfn_QHXzvdTzuvt/s200/ScreenHunter_433+Jan.+11+15.50.jpg" width="200" /></a>It would appear that three years ago her Uncle and his son went hunting with their hunting dog as they always do. They became lost and wandered into a swamp, sinking to the bottom where gases were trapped and they were burned alive.....their bodies never found. Her aunt leaves the french window open convinced that her husband and son will come back home. Vera goes on to tell him that her son always sings "When Johnny Comes Marching Home Again" on their return trip.</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjoU9JuvkZBb-7HbHphjNbeF4ag3cW-BGzYHMZ4WbXR5kjvC8sTk1iWorQTo9AdvSoC4nh9pxc6J_URq23_JyBJUQhPWppgH6Zy5vbvBhFYwd0tjVB0B7_ZKXajC-YV4K2iLdKmolIFCCzK/s1600/ScreenHunter_434+Jan.+11+15.51.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="139" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjoU9JuvkZBb-7HbHphjNbeF4ag3cW-BGzYHMZ4WbXR5kjvC8sTk1iWorQTo9AdvSoC4nh9pxc6J_URq23_JyBJUQhPWppgH6Zy5vbvBhFYwd0tjVB0B7_ZKXajC-YV4K2iLdKmolIFCCzK/s200/ScreenHunter_434+Jan.+11+15.51.jpg" width="200" /></a><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgkMnRpByYvx8N4a7BqiITmUgs2oIzv5AOHXXVeCMJhyphenhyphennWJiaHQRucpEfMUwIEuQNhrih03fi1Kw9PEWZ88bNljAKxm9PkkLcON4BOhzmJ7H_7PhycvE7-J7Wh9LhG9i8CCgKHkwBT3Ddag/s1600/ScreenHunter_433+Jan.+11+15.51.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="141" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgkMnRpByYvx8N4a7BqiITmUgs2oIzv5AOHXXVeCMJhyphenhyphennWJiaHQRucpEfMUwIEuQNhrih03fi1Kw9PEWZ88bNljAKxm9PkkLcON4BOhzmJ7H_7PhycvE7-J7Wh9LhG9i8CCgKHkwBT3Ddag/s200/ScreenHunter_433+Jan.+11+15.51.jpg" width="200" /></a>Mrs. Sappleton comes down and introduces herself to Framton and tells him that her husband and son are out hunting but she expects them back any moment. He desperately tries to change the topic of conversation, but to no avail when she stands up and points out the window saying "There they are!" as we hear the stains of someone singing "When Johnny Comes Marching Home Again".</div>
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Framton looks out the window, terrified and sure enough sees the men walking through the field. The hunting dog running ahead of them, barking.</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjObWW3G_c6IXydciLhrVZgu0125X8Xc62XzED2kyI-STJ7zXTVq35a9RUKwa6LaxW4it_0QefgthMZ7z5nnH4A0Jx1HIVEXrx8VYNox_OimOlcbcyV2Rw5FFvzY2JqLLqil9EtcqXOpy87/s1600/ScreenHunter_436+Jan.+11+15.52.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="138" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjObWW3G_c6IXydciLhrVZgu0125X8Xc62XzED2kyI-STJ7zXTVq35a9RUKwa6LaxW4it_0QefgthMZ7z5nnH4A0Jx1HIVEXrx8VYNox_OimOlcbcyV2Rw5FFvzY2JqLLqil9EtcqXOpy87/s200/ScreenHunter_436+Jan.+11+15.52.jpg" width="200" /></a><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhLEGLC7d4sIzbJ2p12Ef6de5lT55zNDpVBt542q-61VVNz9P4uYeySYsZXi1l0QIgx4ym53cU6J0aNomjydM1Gno7G-KcCZtxH6ppmDW0s4PCjPvfTske7VDw9A1avQc4lmgIvAQstvWXy/s1600/ScreenHunter_435+Jan.+11+15.51.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="139" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhLEGLC7d4sIzbJ2p12Ef6de5lT55zNDpVBt542q-61VVNz9P4uYeySYsZXi1l0QIgx4ym53cU6J0aNomjydM1Gno7G-KcCZtxH6ppmDW0s4PCjPvfTske7VDw9A1avQc4lmgIvAQstvWXy/s200/ScreenHunter_435+Jan.+11+15.51.jpg" width="200" /></a>Are they ghosts haunting the grounds? The undead returned to life? Specters, Ghouls or something else all together? I shan't ruin the twist for you here, but I HIGHLY recommend tracking this little gem down on YouTube to find out. Or pick up a copy of Beasts and Super-Beasts and read the short story. Either way, you won't be disappointed.</div>
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This short could very well be construed as horror-lite. There are no jump scares, no gore, nothing of that variety. What it DOES have is an odd atmosphere that I can only describe as late night. You know exactly what I'm talking about....that feeling that creeps over the strange things you watch at two in the morning after you've had a two liter of Dr. Pepper and gorged yourself on pizza rolls and microwave egg rolls. You're half asleep as whatever movie you watching ends and then suddenly, this begins to un-spool before your bloodshot eyes. Yeah. THAT feeling. This has it in spades. Along with that campfire story kinda feel. Because, literally most of the film is Vera telling Framton the story. No flashback scene. Just her telling the story to Framton. Some might call it boring, but I think it's quite effective.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjLVW5CjIh-ve-KFtRfw8WSru351O3GVavsTQVmPQXmuLa9bahNKaJw2m3YS_ynFRZXNKbM3FL4mX402-bS_fRf3qQPV3j4D2CfgkrGMMfOrB5csRM9ZQvjAJ_dLf087PQoB4LVnKTb2Uel/s1600/ScreenHunter_436+Jan.+11+15.53.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="138" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjLVW5CjIh-ve-KFtRfw8WSru351O3GVavsTQVmPQXmuLa9bahNKaJw2m3YS_ynFRZXNKbM3FL4mX402-bS_fRf3qQPV3j4D2CfgkrGMMfOrB5csRM9ZQvjAJ_dLf087PQoB4LVnKTb2Uel/s200/ScreenHunter_436+Jan.+11+15.53.jpg" width="200" /></a>I remember watching this one waaaay back in the day on a late Friday or Saturday night most likely exactly like the one described in the paragraph above. I forgot all about it until I was recently falling down the rabbit hole that is YouTube searching for old Saturday Nightmare, Up All Night, MonsterVision, Commander USA, etc videos for a completely unrelated project. </div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg34AjdPJ1Fz-Xzsg-iDbtvz_BNXQUgsUmOccrh0DLyCI-zRXFyJZkbFDfctRfViOZ25CdpqXjzkTnQ3uYm5qzEBgyDJzwMoViFWfxUbCPSMdaNdPH_5vQGdeTok1poJY71WzdZmE_6zgBJ/s1600/ScreenHunter_435+Jan.+11+15.52.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="140" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg34AjdPJ1Fz-Xzsg-iDbtvz_BNXQUgsUmOccrh0DLyCI-zRXFyJZkbFDfctRfViOZ25CdpqXjzkTnQ3uYm5qzEBgyDJzwMoViFWfxUbCPSMdaNdPH_5vQGdeTok1poJY71WzdZmE_6zgBJ/s200/ScreenHunter_435+Jan.+11+15.52.jpg" width="200" /></a>I've got some more of these type of shorts that I'll be reviewing soon and hunting down more as well. If you know of any short films that were aired on cable networks in the 80's/90's like this, send 'em my way! The Midnight Cinephile is hungry for more!</div>
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<br />Matthew St. Cyrhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07870183182967553900noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7632679281924009509.post-85952257846103328482016-01-12T01:36:00.000-05:002016-01-12T01:36:43.396-05:00Analog Time Machine - Prologue - The Simpsons Tree House of Horror I<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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If you were a kid in the 80's and you were anything like me then I'm sure you taped stuff of TV all the time. Whether it was a favorite movie that was coming on, or your favorite show or even the news if you're that weird.....the point is, sticking a blank VHS tape in the VCR and capturing a few moments or even hours in time didn't seem like it was a big deal.</div>
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Now I was not your average kid. I was OBSESSED with taping shit off TV. Every Christmas if I didn't get a block of 6 blank tapes, I was upset. Back in the day I had HUNDREDS of tapes. Sadly I've lost some of them, some were destroyed and others just stopped working. But I still have quite a few and I'm going to be going through my tapes and seeing what gold lies within and I thought you'd like to come along for the ride. </div>
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I just got some new analog to digital video hardware and software and I took it for a test spin. The first tape that I popped into the VCR turned out to be a good one so far! First thing that came up was an airing of The Simpson's Treehouse of Horror I. This is not the first airing of TOH, but rather part of a mini marathon or TOH episodes I - III leading up to the broadcast of the (then) brand new Episode IV! It's chock full of awesome early 90's (1993 to be exact) commercials too! So sit back, strap in, turn on the flux capacitor and get ready to go back to the analog past! It's the Analog Time Machine™!</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiBkBlUzIL-M3YOeqKHYORTpt5f43jo7HcLUhc5Idgt0BL0UD1pkOriOv8vLlekUhgBNRBAdvOBv2P5OEqE7hOKrW8Ivzy57oHQv7EfvNyMjS-BUrUoAFoXLzAFxUMV9FybOMzo7Ugdg3c8/s1600/ScreenHunter_437+Jan.+11+16.11.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="473" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiBkBlUzIL-M3YOeqKHYORTpt5f43jo7HcLUhc5Idgt0BL0UD1pkOriOv8vLlekUhgBNRBAdvOBv2P5OEqE7hOKrW8Ivzy57oHQv7EfvNyMjS-BUrUoAFoXLzAFxUMV9FybOMzo7Ugdg3c8/s640/ScreenHunter_437+Jan.+11+16.11.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
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I don't know about you, but <em>The Simpsons Treehouse of Horror</em> (or as it's known it's first rendition <em>The Simpsons Halloween Special</em>) was a major holiday event in my younger years (and to this day I never miss a TOH episode). <em>Garfield's Halloween Adventure</em> was but a distant memory by the time the TOH came about. <em> It's The Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown</em> is great an' all, but damnit, I needed something more. I needed my Halloween specials to have a bit more biting satire. TOH fit that hole in my soul perfectly. Each episode contains three short stories, anthology style, usually based off popular movies, TV shows or books. </div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg0ZnCXBqMX8kTSfnV2pAzdBDX4qxQd9ppqSdLOOzcxCv-b_i1IrDjpUXL6H-93fo26hP7pnOLXR7SuU8Bozjcrg_xjv-MNJb-UgrlqHsr9raQTStJ1Zr5GlPHISVs8dGH1f-8MMxHpw15D/s1600/ScreenHunter_437+Jan.+11+16.12.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg0ZnCXBqMX8kTSfnV2pAzdBDX4qxQd9ppqSdLOOzcxCv-b_i1IrDjpUXL6H-93fo26hP7pnOLXR7SuU8Bozjcrg_xjv-MNJb-UgrlqHsr9raQTStJ1Zr5GlPHISVs8dGH1f-8MMxHpw15D/s640/ScreenHunter_437+Jan.+11+16.12.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
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Ah....the titular treehouse in question. Not a bad little spooky tree fort the Simpson kids have going on here! Cool posable skeleton? Check. Bat decorations? Check. Awesome Jack O'Lantern sitting on the window sill? Check. Creepy Halloween moon shining through the window? Check! And of course, let's not forget the ultra important flashlight for telling scary stories! You know, now that I'm thinking about it, I would have given ANYTHING to have an awesome treehouse like this when I was a kid! </div>
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This intro scene kinda reminds me of a Simpsonized version of The Monster Squad. Or at the very least a Simpsonized version of the the Nightfright segment of <a href="http://www.midnightcinephile.com/2012/09/fright-show-1985-pure-vhs-ecstasy.html">Fright Show</a> (aka Cinemagic), the rare VHS anthology film that I feel like I'm constantly gushing about. Either way, it's kick ass and I love it. </div>
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As we join The Simpson Children, Lisa is finished up telling a version of the old "The Threatening Phone Call Is Coming From Inside The House" story, a la When A Stranger Calls. Bart is suitably unimpressed and offers to tell her a story that's "REALLY scarifying!" Thus begins......</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjMfvIpYeFffohTY6YDDq5NqcjypQxZKHnzkjRJLziC4lZ8UUa_aB_cIibQjiQFeRNQW1GKmRUNkaKaWUJzltgpQ7ut1gJ808KwmlDQjg6ftWau3Kic1yZDXqL2ey4jFiYZxFWKUG2_hyEG/s1600/ScreenHunter_438+Jan.+11+16.13.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="483" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjMfvIpYeFffohTY6YDDq5NqcjypQxZKHnzkjRJLziC4lZ8UUa_aB_cIibQjiQFeRNQW1GKmRUNkaKaWUJzltgpQ7ut1gJ808KwmlDQjg6ftWau3Kic1yZDXqL2ey4jFiYZxFWKUG2_hyEG/s640/ScreenHunter_438+Jan.+11+16.13.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
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The first segment, called Bad Dream House is basically a mash up of haunted house movies. Mostly The Amityville Horror (the house turns people inside homicidal) and Poltergiest (Indian burial ground in the basement.....house self destructs (as seen above)) and does a great job of setting the mood not only for the rest of the episode, but for the rest of the Treehouse of Horror specials as well.</div>
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I can't even tell you how many times I've watched Bad Dream House.....it's got to be in the high thirties to low fifties. Seriously. It's that ridiculous. My favorite part has to be when Homer calls their real estate agent to yell at him for not mentioning that there's an Indian burial ground in the basement (hilariously depicted by a bunch of gravestones with names like Pocahontas on them) eventually hanging up the phone and telling Marge, <strong><em>"He said he mentioned it five or six times."</em></strong></div>
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After Homer's failed phone call, the house starts to threaten the Simpsons with horrible fates: <strong><em> "You will diiiiieeeee. You will die slowwwwwwwly. Your stomach will swelllllllll, your intestines will wriiiithe and booooil. Your eeeeeyes will buuuuurst. And some horrible stuuuuuuuff, possibly your braiiiiin, will start coming out through your noooooooose." </em></strong>Then Marge starts to yell out the house. Lisa tries to make friends and proposes that they all live together happily. I don't wanna say that it goes bad....but...well....you see the screenshot.</div>
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Now, as much fun as it is to watch old episodes of Treehouse of Horror on VHS, I really get a kick out of watching the old commercials. They truly are what makes Analog Time Travel so powerful. So let's take a look at what was being advertised back in late 1993!</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi01rH5U5DB4ldTlUIcVVZF6G1h3-syxekhrl5Phd_sxJMg94CFbFf-MbI84JfZCuXhvEmWUxP9g4jGlJntF9gINXupOyYOfBeJh9EMXSITUIXyOdaMyB4uo_MwxPFaDSCjxc5LgeEHJdGA/s1600/ScreenHunter_438+Jan.+11+16.15.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="484" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi01rH5U5DB4ldTlUIcVVZF6G1h3-syxekhrl5Phd_sxJMg94CFbFf-MbI84JfZCuXhvEmWUxP9g4jGlJntF9gINXupOyYOfBeJh9EMXSITUIXyOdaMyB4uo_MwxPFaDSCjxc5LgeEHJdGA/s640/ScreenHunter_438+Jan.+11+16.15.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
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1-800-COLLECT! Remember the days before smart phones? Days when payphones were everywhere (not that half of them worked) and it cost an arm and a leg to talk to a friend a few states away? Enter 1-800-COLLECT...helping you save money while talking to loved ones far away.</div>
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This particular commercial was college themed. We watch this college fellow as he walks about campus. He appears to be a big deal. Looks like a football player. Probably got a really hot cheerleader girlfriend too. Everybody calls him by a nickname like Buzz, Ogre or Brick. He's a nice enough guy but not terribly bright. Of course the twist at the end of the commercial is that he calls home and says <strong><em>"Mommy? I miss you!"</em></strong></div>
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Onwards! It's an M&M's commercial! And an incredibly 90's one at that! Basically the whole commercial is people sharing their M&M's and smiling while the early 90's M&M's jingle plays on singing about sharing and smiling and stuff. My favorite part is right at the beginning. This leather clad biker couple is sharing a big ass bag of peanut M&M's (my personal favorite!). It seems like a highly illogical snack for a bike trip. I mean sure...they melt in your mouth, not in your hand.....but I'm not seeing any carrying bags on that bike, which means it's going in someone's pocket. It's sunny out. They're going to warm up and get all gooey. Still, looks like they're having a heck of a lot of fun there. </div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj5LNccibaIo8nSoEgWrlIPpV4Joa1-HXYTW3ARWy1eUqf7wBqjoYk3qRBdfg6kKHk6n34wl4YJguKMATeKemtlxoa689w3shpe6gNN9d0RjRsnsepR8d-w2iiopTrufLNdYVLDPQ8Abf3A/s1600/ScreenHunter_438+Jan.+11+16.17.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="488" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj5LNccibaIo8nSoEgWrlIPpV4Joa1-HXYTW3ARWy1eUqf7wBqjoYk3qRBdfg6kKHk6n34wl4YJguKMATeKemtlxoa689w3shpe6gNN9d0RjRsnsepR8d-w2iiopTrufLNdYVLDPQ8Abf3A/s640/ScreenHunter_438+Jan.+11+16.17.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
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It's a Sega commercial! More specifically, a commercial for Sonic Mania Day, which occurred on November 23rd, 1993. What is Sonic Mania Day? I really don't know! I was a Nintendo kid growing up, so I was never into Sonic back then. </div>
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The commercial itself is your standard oddball Sega commercial. This odd looking dude is having a serious problem with his eyes as they roll in all kinds of crazy directions rapidly, eventually falling out of his head. A cartoon Sonic runs around the screen. The announcer talks about Sonic Mania Day. The kid takes his eyes that fell out, shoves them back in his head and does the <strong><em>"SEGA!"</em></strong> yell. Weird. But cool.</div>
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After a quick check, I found that November 23rd was just two days before Thanksgiving in 1993.....so Sonic Mania Day was more than likely a pre-Black Friday sale or something of the like. </div>
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An ad for the next episode of Sinbad. I never watched the show (never really was a fan...though he had one or two stand-up specials that made me laugh) but apparently the upcoming episode was about Sinbad having to buy a minivan. Flat jokes, canned laughter.....next commercial.</div>
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Oh.....and that outfit. I mean.....damn.</div>
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Now we're talking! The Adventures of Brisco County Jr.! The Sci-Fi/Western show starring Bruce Campbell! Lasted only one season, but damn was it awesome! Which episode was coming up on that Friday? I couldn't tell ya exactly. There were explosions and a train top running sequence and all I could think about was finding a copy of The Complete Brisco County on DVD. I'm going to get right on that. </div>
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And we're back to <em>Treehouse of Horror</em> with the second segment: <em>Hungry Are The Damned</em>, which is a fun riff on the classic <em>Twlight Zone</em> episode <em>To Serve Man. </em>TOH will go on to use TZ as a source for material for many years to come, including the ultra-awesome <em>Terror at 5 1/2 Feet</em> episode.</div>
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The Simpsons are having a backyard BBQ when they are suddenly visited by aliens (personal favs Kang and Kodos!), who whisk them away in their flying saucer. Kang & the Gang (my new band name, I think!) tell them that they are bringing them to their home planet called Rigel IV. The Simpsons are to be the guests of honor at a great feast. They are then given all their favorite foods to eat and are encouraged to glut on their favorite chow.</div>
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Lisa, being the suspicious perpetual 8 year old girl that she is, sneaks into the alien's kitchen and finds a book called How To Cook Humans. Homer and family confront the aliens. Turns out there was a bit of confusion and all is not as it seems. Poor slimy aliens just can't get a fair shake this side of the galaxy, ya know?</div>
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Holy crap! This one brings my back! See that human/cartoon hybrid monster back there? That's Bob. According to our spokesman to the left (mugging for the camera every second.), Bob has just completed a MONSTER day at school and needs a snack to satisfy his appetite. Bob seems to enjoy his chocolate milk and grooves on with his bad self while sipping his tasty beverage.</div>
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A Fisher Price remote control car commercial. May seem a bit odd, but remember as far as toy companies and most stores the Christmas season starts around September 1st. So as far as they're concerned this is hot and heavy into the advertising cycle. Hell, Black Friday is less than a month away! Put the idea in their heads early so Mom & Dad know what to get! </div>
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A commercial for Secret Deodorant with Denise Richards! I'm willing to bet that she'd probably rather forget this one. The commercial spends most of the time telling young women that even though they're "blossoming" they're not plants. But don't stink, cause you'll drive away the hunky men. Or something like that. To be honest this was a really weird and ultra 90's commercial. I could have probably gotten about 10 more awesomely bad screen captures from those 30 seconds I spent with teenage Denise. </div>
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A plug for an upcoming episode of Martin. I'm just going to let the screen capture do the talking here.</div>
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If this doesn't scream HALLOWEEN AWESOMENESS at you, then I don't know what to tell you. I mean, COME ON! </div>
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Evidently, driving a Saturn SC2 is much like flying a jet......or so the actress who states that she's also a pilot would have us believe. She wants to drive a car that lets people know a bit about her. Somehow this is supposed to tell people she flies jets? I'm not gonna lie I was a bit confused about this one and my mind wandered back to a teenage Denise Richards selling deodorant. </div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEieyHE623qvY0jxA8PKSdpfcjfaaDKZmX383lnUFmC6i3_iOuEGgEj-135uYc_3xWtxNFQwLYEOUR83MsHtVBSPBcr7ehu3EjQtRT-WfK44JQTJ1-jw1Q2mAtkHHMhq9aawX3_mYglor5do/s1600/ScreenHunter_442+Jan.+11+16.26.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="483" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEieyHE623qvY0jxA8PKSdpfcjfaaDKZmX383lnUFmC6i3_iOuEGgEj-135uYc_3xWtxNFQwLYEOUR83MsHtVBSPBcr7ehu3EjQtRT-WfK44JQTJ1-jw1Q2mAtkHHMhq9aawX3_mYglor5do/s640/ScreenHunter_442+Jan.+11+16.26.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgW1VPYssoIgVtxPIp3lZMLppBkg4rC1ibNSGKF5FRQbgPEjlqwo5LCXGELDxxOVJH5zhyphenhyphen7pwM2b5RyWg4AkeJLp8YTym_sKGAsiZNT4fD39oqj2S3cqzV_qaBCtNzPCd891Tttw72LIyoG/s1600/ScreenHunter_442+Jan.+11+16.27.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"></a>I am downright SHOCKED that it took this long for a fast food commercial to pop up! Better late than never though and Micky D's shows up to save the day! First we're treated to food porn shots of the layers of a grilled McChicken sandwich fall in slow motion, stacking up on each other. Sexy time music plays, which makes me think of teenage Denise Richards again. Then, BAM! The screen is static except for a large container of fries which are apparently free with your order! I LOVE McDonald's fries. They're so greasy and salty and give me chest pain just thinking about them. <br />
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I forgot all about the old "What you want is what you get" slogan. I kinda like it. It's much better than the "I'm lovin' it" crap they've got going on now. They should change it back.<br />
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And we're back and on the final segment of TOH. Lisa decides to try a classic and reads Edgar Allen Poe's immortal classic, The Raven. Homer plays the nameless tortured soul pining for Lenore. Bart has been transmogrified into a raven. Yep. I just used the word transmogrified.....and after a quick online dictionary check, I am happy to report that I even used it correctly! Go me. Oh yeah...Marge (well her portrait anyway) stands in for Lenore. Lisa and Maggie are little cherubs with incense. </div>
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What makes this one of the most fantastic segments of ANY TOH episode is that the poem is recited by James Earl Jones! I mean let's just stop and think about this for a minute. Darth Vader is reciting Edgar Allen Poe while Homer and Bart act it out. It doesn't get much more awesome than that!</div>
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Of course things take a Simpsonesque twist before we're brought to the conclusion. </div>
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After Lisa finishes the story, Marge calls them to bed. Homer, who has been sitting up in the tree listening to the stories is scared and shaking. Shots pan over the kids all sleeping snug in bed. Homer begs Marge not to turn out the light and she reprimands him for being scared of kids stories. She turns out the light and Homer see's the Bart Raven in the window, covers his head and groans "Ooooh, I hate Halloween". Que spooky version of Simpsons theme as ending credits roll.</div>
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Another McDonalds commercial! This time advertising their line of Happy Meal Action figures tied in with <em>Batman: The Animated Series. </em>There's a CGI animated bit where Batman calls Robin and tells him to meet him at the Gotham McDonalds because Catwoman was sighted there. Then it cuts to the toys which are available. And I've got to say they look to be pretty high quality! I never had any (I was a sophomore in high school in October of '93 so I was actively trying to prove that I wasn't a huge nerd. It was a phase. I'm ashamed of it. I've since regained my nerd cred.)</div>
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This is where I must return you to the present for now. The Analog Time Machine sure was fun for me. I've got tons more VHS tapes to delve into and I hope that you'll join me as I turn back the clock and check out my childhood and teenage years through magnetized video tape! </div>
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Matthew St. Cyrhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07870183182967553900noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7632679281924009509.post-37775558010657412732016-01-04T23:19:00.000-05:002016-01-04T23:19:54.461-05:00America 3000 - Chuck Wagner vs The Warrior Women!<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<span style="font-size: x-large;"><b><u>America 3000</u></b></span><br />
<b><span style="font-size: large;">1986</span></b><br />
<b>D: David Engelbach</b><br />
<b>W: David Engelbach</b><br />
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<b>S: Chuck Wagner, Laurene Landon & William Wallace</b><br />
<span style="font-size: x-small;"><b>Rated PG-13 - Approx 92 Min.</b></span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-small;"><b>Golan-Globus/The Cannon Group</b></span><br />
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<b><u>Taglines:</u></b><br />
<i> - Back to the beginning</i><br />
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<i> - An outrageous post-nuke adventure</i><br />
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<b><u>Alternate Titles:</u></b><br />
America 3000: Thunder Fighters - Spain (Video Title)<br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><b><i>"What the Presi says, the Presi does!"</i></b></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><b><i> - Korvis</i></b></span><br />
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Well right off the bat, we know we're dealing with a cannon film, so we know that it's going to be pure awesome-sauce. This flick definitely ranks up there with the likes of A Nymphoid Barbarian in Dinosaur Hell, The New Barbarians, Warriors of the Lost World and other such post-apocalyptic wackiness. This is exactly the kinda flick that I would find myself watch late on a Friday or Saturday night on USA Up All Night. <br />
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It's the year 2890.....900 years after the "Great Nuke" that destroyed the world. The Earth is now dominated by Amazonian women split into various factions. Men are used as either manual labor (Machos) or sex slaves Seeders.....solely for the purpose of breeding more women....or Frau as they are called). A young seeder named Korvis breaks free and grows up to be Chuck Wagner. Korvis learns to read out of a child's alphabet book and slowly forms his own tribe of liberated men, who start to organize to strike back against the oppressive Fraus.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEip-4f8c_QtkuvTktoKJi1exvTLnUGsbmQh8GW9_m0fmy36W5oyLTdh4WR8Qa6tFrMrY2HiKoxH4pw9WUkLpNfYxwm8ezfT0emJqS9vuwgUvxRRg9tYyZqueW5Ai_MMnQSyJN7qN3jFMilk/s1600/ScreenHunter_431+Jan.+04+21.18.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="301" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEip-4f8c_QtkuvTktoKJi1exvTLnUGsbmQh8GW9_m0fmy36W5oyLTdh4WR8Qa6tFrMrY2HiKoxH4pw9WUkLpNfYxwm8ezfT0emJqS9vuwgUvxRRg9tYyZqueW5Ai_MMnQSyJN7qN3jFMilk/s400/ScreenHunter_431+Jan.+04+21.18.jpg" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Yep, it's Automan himself! CHUCK WAGNER!</td></tr>
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Chuck...er...Korvis ends up finding the 900 year old remains of the presidential bunker, which still remarkable has power. He finds a cache of weapons and a boombox and sets out to end the war of the sexes once and for all. His golden radiation suit gleaming in the sunshine, he rides his steed back to the men's camp, blasting hair metal out of his boombox.....which I guess had some damn good Duracell batteries in it!<br />
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Korvis arranges a meeting with Vena, the leader of the local Frau tribe (the leaders are called Tiaras) in hopes that he can talk to her and make her see the error of her ways. Unfortunately Lakella (Vena's sister) is a blood thirsty man hater who wants to destroy every bit of testosterone in sight. She's sort of a bitch. Which is hot. In that mean pretty girl kinda way.<br />
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Will Korvis and Vena find common ground? Can men and women live together in harmony? Watch America 3000 to find out!<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjzDfbArcYdQPgQpHOtBMTel1TJZrH-ZFv2JwonMfyUu95O6sE9xDPEKfVVwfxtEHdhGQ-RjrsoSeVGSUF9Xtu-RVK9Jv6ID9LcCM5TEuwg5LQorDnP1Fq3yQo5Yj4-m_YJsPw6-pw705NA/s1600/ScreenHunter_431+Jan.+04+21.30.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="303" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjzDfbArcYdQPgQpHOtBMTel1TJZrH-ZFv2JwonMfyUu95O6sE9xDPEKfVVwfxtEHdhGQ-RjrsoSeVGSUF9Xtu-RVK9Jv6ID9LcCM5TEuwg5LQorDnP1Fq3yQo5Yj4-m_YJsPw6-pw705NA/s400/ScreenHunter_431+Jan.+04+21.30.jpg" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Vena and her Warrior Women!</td></tr>
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There is a bit of a barrier to entry in this flick, which is the fact that inexplicably, the filmmakers decided that in this post apocalyptic world there's a no lingo that everyone speaks. Some words are made up. Other words are given different meanings. For example: Negi means no. Scan means to look. Woggo means crazy. Cold means dead.......so you'll hear alot of sentences that sound like this:<br />
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<i>"Negga. Don't go there. That woggo Frau will scan you and you'll end up cold!"</i><br />
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At first I thought this was going to be a major problem, but truth be told after a little while, I picked up the lingo and had no problems keeping up with the wonky dialog. So long as you keep and open mind and open ears, you'll be fine. <br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Nice duds, El Presidente!</td></tr>
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I've gotta give a special shout out to the best character in the whole damn flick: Aargh the Awful. A mutant Bigfoot like beast who the Frau keep caged up for warrior training. He's gawdamn amazing. The final freeze frame of the movie involves Aargh and I've gotta tell you, I think it just might be the best freeze frame I've ever seen in my entire life. Seriously. It's THAT good.<br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Aargh The Awful!</td></tr>
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<u><b>Ranking in John Stanley's Creature Features:</b></u><br />
One Star.<b><span style="font-size: x-large;"> <span style="color: cyan;">*</span></span></b><br />
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<u><b>Gore:</b></u><br />
There's a little blood here and there, but nothing major. This is a PG-13 movie, after all.<br />
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<u><b>T&A:</b></u><br />
Nope. Nada. Which is really disappointing....it's a Cannon film, damnit! <br />
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<u><b>Monsters:</b></u><br />
Aargh the Awful! He's so damn awesome. I might start a hair metal band and name it after him.<br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Aargh is just so damn awesome!</td></tr>
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<u><b>Final Thoughts:</b></u><br />
Like I said before, this flick reminds me of the kind of late night flicks I used to watch on USA Up All Night and I felt quite nostalgic watching it. I almost felt like I was back in my childhood bedroom with a bag of Dorito's and a Dr. Pepper.<br />
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Being the kind of guy that I am, I've included a small clip of the film below. In this scene, Lynka is about to get seeded by a strapping young fellow. I think that the may have missed the ball in the music department though, so I gave them a bit of a hand. Enjoy!<br />
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<b><u><br /></u></b>Matthew St. Cyrhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07870183182967553900noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7632679281924009509.post-47744859713588804022016-01-04T01:24:00.002-05:002016-01-04T01:24:54.844-05:00Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens - A Spoiler Filled Review!<b>Well, I figure if you've made it past the post title you've seen the movie and you're well aware that I am going to be going full spoiler here. </b><br />
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<b><i>Yep. Welcome to the new Midnight Cinephile. I'll spoil the shit out of some stuff, but I'll give you fair warning before hand, so if you read something that you didn't want to, it's your own damn fault! Okay? Okay! Let's get this bad monkey started!</i></b><br />
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<span style="font-size: x-large;"><b><u>Star Wars Episode VII</u></b></span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;"><b><u>The Force Awakens</u></b></span><br />
<b><span style="font-size: large;">2015</span></b><br />
<b>D: J.J. Abrams</b><br />
<b>W: J.J. Abrams, Lawrence Kasdan & </b><b>Michael Arndt<span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span></b><br />
<b> S: Daisy Ridley, John Boyega & Oscar Isaac</b><br />
<span style="font-size: x-small;"><b>Rated PG-13 - Approx 135 Min.</b></span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-small;"><b>Disney/Lucasfilm</b></span><br />
<b><u>Taglines</u></b><br />
<i> - Every generation has a story.</i><br />
<i> - Coming to your galaxy this winter.</i><br />
<i> - The force is calling to you. Just let it in.</i><br />
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<i> - A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away...</i><br />
<b><u>Alternate Titles</u></b><br />
Okay, so it's pretty much the same everywhere. Slight variations not much to report on. Except for the Vietnamese title which according to IMDb is<b> Thân Lúc Thực Tình</b>. Running that through Google Translator comes up with <b>Body At Food Situation. </b>Uhhh....what?<br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><b><i>"The droid... stole a freighter?"</i></b></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><b><i> -Kylo Ren</i></b></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><b><i><br /></i></b></span>
<i>Luke Skywalker has vanished.</i><br />
<i>In his absence the sinister</i><br />
<i>FIRST ORDER has risen from</i><br />
<i>the ashes of the Empire</i><br />
<i>and will not rest until</i><br />
<i>Skywalker, the last of the Jedi,</i><br />
<i>has been destroyed.</i><br />
<i><br /></i>
<i>With the support of the</i><br />
<i>REPUBLIC, General Leia Organa</i><br />
<i>leads a brave RESISTANCE.</i><br />
<i>She is desperate to find her</i><br />
<i>brother Luke and gain his</i><br />
<i>help in restoring peace</i><br />
<i>an justice to the galaxy.</i><br />
<i><br /></i>
<i>Leia sent her most daring</i><br />
<i>pilot on a secret mission </i><br />
<i>to </i><i>Jakku, where an old ally</i><br />
<i>has discovered a clue to </i><br />
<i>Luke's whereabouts . . . . </i><br />
<i><br /></i>
<i><br /></i>
Now THAT is an opening crawl, damnit! No Trade Federations or treaties or other political jargon. BOOM! Luke has vanished! The extremely Nazi-esque First Order has risen like a dark phoenix from the rubble of the severely crippled Empire. Leia is no longer a princess, but rather a general and she's searching for Luke so that he can open up a can of Force Whup'Ass on the First Order! Plus it sets us up to meet Poe Dameron. What more can you ask for? It's everything you could possible want in the Star Wars Universe condensed into three paragraphs that made me at once giddy and nostalgic.<br />
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I'm not going to go through the entire plot, but rather pick and choose some of the scenes that really resonated with me. Again, since you're reading this, that means that you've seen it (or you just don't care about spoilers!) So here's some of my favorite moments.<br />
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Right off the bat we're on Jakku were Poe Dameron is meeting with Lor San Tekka (which is a tiny role played by the always amazing Max Von Sydow. Tekka is the 'old ally" referred to in the opening crawl. He gives Poe the missing piece of a map that supposedly leads to Luke Skywalker. All is well until Kylo Ren shows up looking for the map. Poe beats feet to his X-Wing with everyone's favorite new droid, BB-8. Stormtroopers blast his engines disabling him. They capture Poe and bring him to Ren, who takes him prisoner after killing Tekka. BB-8 escapes out into the desert.<br />
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Now this opening scene blew my mind for a few reasons: First off, we get our first look at Kylo Ren. He's pretty intimidating, what with his Vader-like mask and unstable looking cross-guard lightsaber. The most insane part of the scene is when Poe first off a shot from his blaster and Ren stops the bolt mid air with The Force! That's scorching plasma just hanging in the air through his shear will of The Force. Holy shit! This guys got some serious chops! <br />
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The other thing that really caught me with this scene is our introduction to Finn (or FN-1287 as we're first introduced to him as). The raid on Jakku is his first battle and after watching a fellow Stormtrooper catch a blaster shot from Poe's X-Wing to the chest, he freezes. His fallen comrade wipes a bloodied hand across his helmet, which for the first time in the entire series humanized a Stormtrooper. That's some pretty powerful stuff!<br />
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Finn decides that he is not going to kill for the first order and helps Dameron escape a First Order Star Destroyer in a TIE Fighter. The two men immediately bond (as I suppose you would when you've just escaped death together) and you know that this is going to be a strong friendship to watch throughout the rest of the trilogy. The two have a fantastic chemistry and I'm looking forward to seeing more of their exploits! <br />
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What more could you ask for in an opening sequence? I mean We're introduced to a pretty awesome villain. We're introduced to two of our heroes as well as one of the cutest damn droids this side of Coruscant! Action! Adventure! This Jedi craves those things!<br />
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It was interesting that the revealed as early as they did that Kylo is in fact Han & Leia's son. There had already been so much hype, talk and speculation on the internet that you just KNEW he was going to be someone's kid. I did think that it was really awesome that his given name is Ben Solo. It's a perfect nod to the recently erased Expanded Universe that Disney no longer considers to be canon. See in the EU, Ben was the name of Luke Skywalker's son (with Mara Jade in case ya didn't know). The scene in which Han confronts Kylo/Ben on Starkiller Base was extremely powerful for me. I knew that Han was going to die. Hell, Harrison Ford has wanted to kill off Han since The Empire Strikes Back. What I didn't know was how hard it was going to hit me. The scene was masterfully shot. The look on Han's face when Kylo runs him through with his lightsaber....not an ounce of hatred. Only sadness and love for his son. Before falling off the precipice that they are standing on, Han puts a hand up to Ben's face, almost comforting his son who is clearly agonized and conflicted over what he's done. It was like a punch right in my gut. It knocked the wind out of me and tears instantly streamed down my face. It actually made it sort of hard to concentrate on the movie for a few moments for me. It hurt less on the second viewing though, so that was good.<br />
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There's been a lot of talk online (and in person) where people are complaining that this is basically A New Hope version 2.0. Well, sure it's similar but really, isn't that what Star Wars is all about? Lucas said many years ago that each trilogy (remember this was envisioned as a twelve-parter originally) was meant to be a parallel to the others. It's a the story of the Skywalker family and if history has taught us anything, it's that it is cyclical. <br />
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So if the Star Wars saga is meant to chronicle generations of Skywalkers, then who is the new Skywalker in this trilogy. Well, my money is on Rey. For a number of reasons. First of all, her Force powers really awaken when she touches Luke's lightsaber and she has visions. She see's Kylo and the Knights of Ren standing over what I'm assuming are the slain bodies of Luke's students. We see a darkened hallway on Bespin. A hooded Luke putting a hand on R2-D2. All vague yet Skywalker-centric stuff. Plus we now know what I suspected at the end of the film. When Rey is standing atop to the cliff with Luke, I thought I saw recognition in his eyes. Not for his old lightsaber, but recognition of Rey. My theory is that Ben and Rey are cousins and will end up on polar opposite sides of The Force.<br />
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I'm not even going to get into the lightsaber fight between Finn/Rey and Kylo Ren. It's been debated to death online already. <br />
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Captain Phasma was absolutely amazing and I can't wait to see more of her in future Episodes. I think she's going to have a lot more to add to the story. <br />
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Supreme Leader Snoke was actually pretty damn awesome. The running theory that he is indeed Darth Plageuis...and I'm leaning towards that as well, but time will tell! <br />
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<b><u>Gore</u></b><br />
There's actually a little of the red stuff spilling in this episode. The aforementioned Stormtrooper who takes a full frontal blast from an X-Wing canon was definitely exsanguinating!<br />
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<b><u>T&A</u></b><br />
Sorry dude, no Slave Leia style costumes this time around. But Daisy Ridley could wear a garbage bag and I'd still find her hot. <br />
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<b><u>Monsters</u></b><br />
There are more monsters, aliens and creatures than you can shake a gundark at! Seriously. It's Star Wars!<br />
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<b><u>Final Thoughts</u></b><br />
Since everyone else is picking an order of their favorite Star Wars films, I figured I should probably do the same. So without further adieu, I give you the Midnight Cinephile Official Star Wars Film Preference Order™:<br />
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<b>1 - Empire Strikes Back</b><br />
<b>2 -The Force Awakens</b><br />
<b>3 - Return of the Jedi</b><br />
<b>4 - A New Hope</b><br />
<b>5 - Revenge of the Sith </b><br />
<b>6 - Attack of the Clones</b><br />
<b>7 - The Phantom Menace</b><br />
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I'm sure that order of preference will probably piss off a lot of people, but hey.....it's my damn list! <br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><i><br /></i></span>Matthew St. Cyrhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07870183182967553900noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7632679281924009509.post-22805337020817418412016-01-03T21:07:00.000-05:002016-01-03T21:07:17.434-05:00Godzilla: Resurgence Possible Photo LeaksIf you are a regular reader here, I'm going to assume that you are just as much of a Godzilla fan as I am. Likewise I will assume that you are just as excited that Toho is rebooting Big G again with <b><span style="color: #38761d;"><i>Godzilla: Resurgence</i></span></b> due out July 26th of this year.<div>
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After the success of Legendary's Godzilla film in 2014, Toho decided the time was right to revamp Big G on the domestic market. This new Toho Godzilla has NOTHING to do with the Legendary version and is serving as a reboot for Toho's franchise. This has me beyond excited because as much as I loved the Legendary version of Godzilla, nothing beats a Toho production.</div>
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There have been a series of photos flooding online Godzilla fan sites that are allegedly photos taken from Toho's back-lot and leaked online. I really hope that these are real, because I am really digging the new nightmarish version of Godzilla that Toho has dreamed up. Let's take a look!</div>
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The sunlight is sort of obscuring the finer details, but here we get more of a sense of Big G's look. Check out those almost skeletal looking hands!! At first I was a bit taken aback by them...I thought they looked kinda scrawny and weak. However, the more I think about it, the more I really dig it. This is a return to a nuclear monster. He is not just an overgrown lizard, but a horrific monstrosity born of nuclear fallout and radiation. <br />
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Better look at the detail on his chest as well as Godzilla's extremely long neck! I've been seeing Giraffezilla jokes going around already. I'm very curious to see how this iteration will move on screen. <br />
I'm still loving that mouthful of sharp needle like teeth!<br />
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Very low-res, but still shows more interesting details. It would appear that Godzilla has some pretty massive wounds, though that could just be some new and never before seen skin texturing. The red coloring is also quite interesting and the first thing that keeps coming to mind is the glowing red patches that Godzilla sported in Godzilla vs Destoroyah. This photo also really makes Big G look like a 118 meter tall zombie. Which naturally makes my heart literally explode with joy.<br />
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A close-up of Godzilla's eye (the small eyes still seem a bit strange, but much like the skeletal arms and hands...they're starting to grow on me). Also a good look at his sharp, needle-like teeth. The tooth placement makes me think of a shark, which makes sense. This is a predator. This is a wild animal that is designed to be on top of the food chain. I don't think this 'zilla is gonna be saving the Earth from other monsters. Having said that, I can't wait to see what other monster Toho dreams up and redesigns! I'd love to see a more horrific version of the classic kaiju!</div>
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Fantastic piece of fan art that I really hope isn't too far off from the real thing! I mean look at this guy! He's freaking amazing! There is nothing that I don't love about this design. I can't wait to see Godzilla stomp the ever loving hell out of some buildings and I can't wait to see how his atomic breath looks too! </div>
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The teaser poster for Godzilla Resurgence! Tiny eye staring down at us, sharp needle shark teeth at the ready. I truly hope that Godzilla Resurgence gets released stateside relatively quickly because I swear I will fly to Japan just to watch this damn movie in July! </div>
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Love all things Godzilla? Stay tuned to Midnight Cinephile because in the monster leading up to Godzilla Resurgence, I'm going to go Kaiju Krazy! We'll take a look at the 30 films that have come before this one as well as other NON-Godzilla Kaiju! 2016 is gonna be a GIANT year!</div>
Matthew St. Cyrhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07870183182967553900noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7632679281924009509.post-42448858705870875042016-01-02T21:41:00.002-05:002016-01-02T21:44:55.118-05:00The Brain - Toothy Grey Matter<div style="border-image: none;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj9x91Jf2JzfM42Xwd5Zs_1MglvTH0tMaDFQIng0-quYFGjO_h8UvSatyhLLnI9gym95O5bBkj1JoHsmBU7-Tc2I70JjjqjffHuFrdt_OwAOaG8XspfP6T8FcLW0GQDK-Y-znjUbwEI3Pm2/s1600/The-Brain-front.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj9x91Jf2JzfM42Xwd5Zs_1MglvTH0tMaDFQIng0-quYFGjO_h8UvSatyhLLnI9gym95O5bBkj1JoHsmBU7-Tc2I70JjjqjffHuFrdt_OwAOaG8XspfP6T8FcLW0GQDK-Y-znjUbwEI3Pm2/s400/The-Brain-front.jpg" width="223" /></a><strong><u><span style="font-size: x-large;">The Brain</span></u></strong></div>
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<strong><span style="font-size: large;">1988</span></strong></div>
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<strong><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: small;">D: Ed Hunt <br />W: Barry Pearson<br />S: Tom Bresnahan, Cynthia Preston & David Gale</span> </span></strong></div>
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">Rated R - Approx 94 Minutes</span></strong><br />
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">Brightstar Films</span></strong><br />
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<strong><span style="font-size: small;"><u>Taglines:</u></span></strong><br />
<em> - The Pounding of the Afterbrain Signals Vengeance and Death! </em><br />
<em> - Mind over Matter.</em> <br />
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<strong><u>Alternate Titles:</u></strong><br />
Manipulations - France (Video Title)<br />
Evil Mastermind - Greece<br />
The Bed - Hungary<br />
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<strong><em><span style="font-size: large;">"That's food for thought!"</span></em></strong><br />
<strong><em><span style="font-size: large;"> -Dr. Anthony Blakely</span></em></strong><br />
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<span style="font-size: small;">I originally was going to start up reviews with something completely different, but I could not resist the urge to review this amazingly cheesy bit of canuxploitation. Why, you ask? Well, I've been wanting to see this little slice of fried gold since I first came across it in the early 90's at my local Blockbuster Video. I would have happily rented it many a Friday night, but the damn thing was never in. The empty case just sat on the shelf taunting me. For those who may not remember the good ol' days of Blockbuster Video, they would keep the empty VHS (or DVD) covers on the shelf with the actual copies of the film BEHIND it in Blockbuster clamshell cases. I'm pretty sure that The Brain sat there empty on the shelf for over three years. Staring at me. Taunting me. To the best of my knowledge it has never been official released on DVD here in the states (though it did get a UK release which is now out of print) and eventually it just sort of slipped out of mind (pun INTENDED) until I was going down the Amazon Prime Instant Video Rabbit Hole(™) and came across a listing for The Brain. I wasn't sure it was the same film though because it had a really weird poster:</span><br />
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What in the hell is that? First off, that dude does no appear in the movie. Hell this still isn't even from the movie. What does a railway worker running next to a train have to do with an alien brain hypnotizing Canadian folk? Very odd indeed. Had I not clicked on the poster out of sheer curiosity, I would have totally missed it!</div>
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Having said all that, The Brain was everything that I was hoping for and so much more! Questionable acting, goofy special effects and a slimy rubber monster brain that just might be one of my all time favorite movie monsters! </div>
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The film revolves around Dr. Anthony Blakely who hosts a show called Independent Thinkers. Which is rather hilarious because with the help of an evil alien brain from who knows where, he hypnotizes people through the show and causes hallucinations. Those who refuse to watch his show and those who are resistant to The Brain's hypnosis are hunted down mercilessly. Such is the case with our hero, Jim Majelewski and his girlfriend Janet. See Jim's parents bring him to Dr. Blakely to try and fix his rebellious behavior and the good doctor hooks him up to some electrodes and The Brain tries several times to hypnotize him, unsuccessfully. The Brain then causes Jim to hallucinate a naked woman. Hey, if you're gonna hallucinate, there are worse things to see! Eventually, Jim breaks through the hallucination as well and is told to go on his way. That's when The Brain launches it's attack on poor Jim. As the audience we're never sure what's real and what's a hallucination as we follow Jim and Janet on the run, which I thought was kinda cool. We're just along for the ride.</div>
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The Brain is basically an 80's overhaul of the giant brain flicks of the 50's....stuff like The Brain From Planet Arous and Fiend Without A Face. It's 100% pure cheddar and 100% what you are looking for if you're in the mood for a fun monster flick on Friday night. Add some pizza, booze and like minded friends and you've got the makings of a great movie night. Show it as a double feature with another 80's-tastic monster flick like Neon Maniacs and you've got yourself a damn fine night!</div>
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<u><strong>Gore</strong></u></div>
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As I mentioned before there are some decent gore gags here. Decapitations, disemboweling, people getting eaten by The Brain.....all kinda goodness!</div>
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<u><strong>T&A</strong></u></div>
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We got yer boobs right here! Sure, they're hallucinatory boobs, but hey.....boobs are boobs!</div>
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<u><strong>Monsters</strong></u></div>
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The Brain! I don't know where it comes from or why exactly it's here, but it starts out the size of a dog and grows to the size of a pick-up truck by the end of the movie. See, it grows every time it eats someone. The monster is a giant rubber/latex beast with weird unblinking eyes and giant gnashing teeth. In short.....it's awesome.</div>
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It's a strange thing watching a film that you've wanted to see for damn near thirty years! Often times you're only setting yourself up for disappointment, but in this case, I was quite pleasantly surprised by how much I dug the film! What more can you ask for?!<br />
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;"><br /></span></strong>Matthew St. Cyrhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07870183182967553900noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7632679281924009509.post-71190357756481452982016-01-01T23:59:00.000-05:002016-01-01T23:59:03.937-05:00It's 2016! New Year, Different Cinephile.Greetings Friends!<br />
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Your eyes deceive you not, 'tis I! Your friendly neighborhood Cinephile! I have returned from my cinematic slumbers ready to face the new year with a sense of wonder and awe. <br />
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As you know, I announced that I was going to be taking a break in November. I had become disenchanted with writing about movies for a bit. I needed a little bit of time to step away and find my passion again. I had started to spread myself a bit thin and took on too many projects and I burnt my candle at both ends. I am happy to report however, that I've got several new candles and I'm ready and refreshed burn a little midnight oil while bringing you quality film & television reviews as well as opinion pieces, editorials, interviews, news and more. <br />
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You will also notice that I will be reviewing and talking about a wider variety of films and television as well. Because as much as I love horror, sci-fi & fantasy, I also love other genres and types of films as well. For instance, did you know that I am a huge fan of classic cinema? True story. I am deeply in love with Greta Garbo and Betty Grable. I wish Cary Grant and Jimmy Stewart were my best friends. We're going to be talking a lot more about the classics here at MC.<br />
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Yes, you can expect a much wider variety of content here on Midnight Cinephile in the coming year and beyond. I have rekindled my love of cinema and I can't wait to talk to you all about it! A Movies, B Movies all the way down to Z Movies. Horror, Sci-Fi, Fantasy, Comedy, Drama, Action, Adventure.....it's all going to be here.....so stay tuned!<br />
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Happy New Years!<br />
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Cheers!<br />
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-MattMatthew St. Cyrhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07870183182967553900noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7632679281924009509.post-29194127984116122562015-12-07T01:42:00.003-05:002015-12-07T01:42:47.791-05:00Tales From Beyond The Pale - Food ChainOkay, okay....<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjFDe41ALM20VNwc1NgcYlq6sgdcu9uYVlGnK7iw-ttOpkjgUZsGJTJS1PwqEPYk4pizMRJoCoAOUMG2HxnAOZg-3rz72rf3vqy9hj74DWcMPfnJqqtOAQPXZ0i-lcIXMF1hTRMlsImhJ_K/s1600/Food-Chain-360x504.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjFDe41ALM20VNwc1NgcYlq6sgdcu9uYVlGnK7iw-ttOpkjgUZsGJTJS1PwqEPYk4pizMRJoCoAOUMG2HxnAOZg-3rz72rf3vqy9hj74DWcMPfnJqqtOAQPXZ0i-lcIXMF1hTRMlsImhJ_K/s320/Food-Chain-360x504.jpg" width="228" /></a></div>
So I know I said that I was taking a break from Midnight Cinephile for a while, but something has come up that I just had to break silence for:<br />
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My good friend April Snellings (whom I'm sure you know from her work at Rue Morgue Magazine and also as 2014's Special Guest for the Halloween Midnight Cinephile Special Podcast) has written an episode for Tales From Beyond The Pale, entitled Food Chain.<br />
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What's Tales From Beyond The Pale you ask? It is a series half hour radio plays created/produced by Larry Fessenden of Glass Eye Pix. April was asked to pen and episode for Season 3 and oh man has she delivered! I immediately downloaded the episode and let it seep into my ear holes.<br />
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The story involves four good ol' boy hunters who are hired to hunt a very particular hairy beast haunting the woods. Obviously we're talking Bigfoot here, but I will not divulge anything further because this story is just so damn fun. All the voice actors (Including Fessenden and Sean Young) are top notch. The dialog is crisp and hilarious and works in perfect tandem with the epically awesome gross out scenes. <br />
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I actually listened to this twice in a row because I enjoyed it so damn much! It also gave me a hankering for more Bigfoot related entertainment. Maybe some Boggy Creek is in order.....<br />
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I truly hope that April is able to write more episodes. She is a truly gifted writer and I can't wait to hear what she comes up with next!<br />
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You can download Food Chain on <a href="http://www.amazon.com/Tales-Beyond-Pale-Food-Chain/dp/B0187SBG2C/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1449470462&sr=8-1&keywords=Tales+from+Beyond+The+Pale+Food+Chain">Amazon</a>, <a href="https://itunes.apple.com/us/audiobook/tales-from-beyond-pale-food/id1061192351">iTunes</a> or direct from the <a href="http://talesfrombeyondthepale.com/tales/season-3/food-chain/">Tales From Beyond The Pale website!</a><br />
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<br />Matthew St. Cyrhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07870183182967553900noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7632679281924009509.post-12599998308859175052015-11-24T11:04:00.001-05:002015-11-24T11:04:12.293-05:00What Now?Hello Constant Reader,<br />
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As you are more than well aware, Midnight Cinephile has lost quite a bit of steam this year. It's a bit complicated, but I've found myself drifting away from constantly droning on about movies that only (and precious few others) seem to care about. <br />
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I've tried various methods to make Midnight Cinephile a more interactive place and I can't seem to inspire much conversation among the few readers that I have. It's become clear that I'm going about this whole thing wrong and it's taken the wind out of my sails. <br />
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I am not shutting Midnight Cinephile down, but I don't think I will be generating any new content for a little while. I hope that those of you who do come here on a regular basis will continue to check in every now and then....maybe read some old articles until I figure out what to do with everything.<br />
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I would like to thank all of you who come here and read my bizarre little love letters to bizarre cinema. I hope you all have a wonderful holiday season and I will see you all soon.<br />
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Much love,<br />
MattMatthew St. Cyrhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07870183182967553900noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7632679281924009509.post-35142466313767961162015-11-08T01:29:00.002-05:002015-11-08T01:29:22.678-05:00Metroid: The Sky Calls - Samus Aran Gets Gritty<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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If, like me, you grew up in the golden age of video games, playing 8-Bit classics such as Metroid, then undoubtedly you thought more than once "Man, this would me such an awesome movie!" Then the Super Mario Bros movie happened and pretty much but the kibosh on future Nintendo films. Fans have been clamoring for feature film versions of classic video games since and the attempts that Hollywood has made at creating good video game themed movies has been quite dismal. <br />
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Enter Rainfall films, the three man operation who was behind the epic Legend of Zelda trailer that IGN used as a prank for April Fools Day several years ago. Metroid: The Sky Calls is an eleven minute short that is based on the classic Nintendo franchise. Though it is based on the games series, the short itself does not take any story cues from the games. Instead it uses the established universe created by the franchise and tells a new story.<br />
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Nerd extraordinaire Jessica Chobot plays Samus as she investigates a strange signal that may lead her to discover what happened to the race of beings that raised her as a child. She does an outstanding job, I thought. A good portion of the film is CGI, with her role relegated mostly to head shots inside her helmet (think Robert Downey Jr. in Iron Man) but I think she's got the stuff to carry the character for a feature film.<br />
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The film perfectly emulates the dark sci-fi of the 70's - especially films like Alien and 2001, while still perfectly encapsulating the look and feel of the Metroid universe. This was actually not a stretch because Metroid was in fact designed to emulate those films to begin with. There is a palpable sense of desolation and isolation. <br />
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Back in August, Nintendo expressed interest in expanding their brand beyond video games and possibly allowing their IP's to be used in official movies again (The Sky Calls is an unofficial fan film). If they are serious, then they should sit up and take notice. There is so much love and care that was put into this short. My only complaint is that it was not longer. I really got sucked into the micro-story and wanted to know more about what happened at the end. <br />
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Check out the film below and let me hear your thoughts on it!<br />
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<br />Matthew St. Cyrhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07870183182967553900noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7632679281924009509.post-63142246059708173672015-10-21T12:26:00.000-04:002015-10-21T12:26:04.572-04:00Embryo - They Grow Up So Fast, Don't They?<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<span style="font-size: x-large;"><b><u>Embryo</u></b></span><br />
<b><span style="font-size: large;">1976</span></b><br />
<b>D: Ralph Nelson</b><br />
<b>W: Anita Doohan & Jack W. Thomas </b><br />
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<b>S: Rock Hudson, Barbara Carrera, Diane Ladd</b><br />
<span style="font-size: x-small;"><b>Rated PG - Approx 104 Minutes</b></span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-small;"><b>Plura Service Company/Sandy Howard Productions</b></span><br />
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<b><u>Taglines:</u></b><br />
<i> - From Embryo to woman in 4 and a half weeks.</i><br />
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<b><u>Alternate Titles:</u></b><br />
Embryo Lethal - Spain<br />
The Devil's Workshop - Greece<br />
The Brood of Evil - West Germany<br />
Fetus - Turkey<br />
Created To Kill - USA Alternative Title<br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><i><b>"You let me win! Nobody lets me win!!!"</b></i></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><i><b> </b></i></span><i style="font-size: x-large;"><b> -Frank Riley</b></i><br />
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I'm not exactly sure when it happened, but at a certain point in the late 60's/early 70's filmmakers seemed to feel a need to legitimize their science fiction and horror films. More and more often you would find a preamble to the film, talking about the very real nature of the film's subject matter. Take for example today's film: Embryo. Before we even get started we're met with some preambled text that reads:<br />
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<b><i>THE FILM YOU ARE ABOUT THE SEE IS NOT ALL SCIENCE FICTION. IT IS BASED UPON MEDICAL TECHNOLOGY WHICH CURRENTLY EXISTS FOR FETAL GROWTH OUTSIDE THE WOMB.</i></b><br />
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<b><i>IT COULD BE A POSSIBILITY TOMORROW....OR TODAY.</i></b><br />
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<b><i> CHARLES R. BRINKMAN III M.D.</i></b><br />
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That's a bit on the heavy handed side, which makes the film that follows all the more difficult to watch. The film takes itself WAY to seriously and tries to pass itself off as serious hard Sci-Fi. Had director Ralph Nelson shot this as the B-Movie that it is, I think the results would have been much more enjoyable. That's not to say that I didn't enjoy the film...or at least parts of it. <br />
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Rock Hudson (<i>McMillan & Wife, Dynasty, The Martian Chronicles</i>) plays scientist Paul Holliston. One rainy night he hits a pregnant dog with his car. He scoops her up and brings her back to his basement lab (He's sorta a mad scientist, I guess) to try and save her life. When he realizes that the poor pooch can't be saved he does his best to save her pups by extracting them from her womb and putting them in vats of.....erm.....stuff...to let them continue to grow. Of the four pups, only one survives. The dog grows from pup to adulthood in a matter of weeks and Holliston then decides that he needs to try again, this time with a human fetus. What a great idea! Not.<br />
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And so, procuring a viable fetus through legal, yet morally ambiguous means, he begins the experiment anew and....um...grows a baby girl who grows into the lusciously beautiful Victoria Spencer (played by Bond Girl, Barbara Carrera). Not only is does Victoria grow rapidly into a full grown woman, but she is also incredibly intelligent.....and homicidal as it turns out. Hey, two out of three ain't bad.<br />
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Embryo is a very talky movie and as such it makes for some tedious viewing. HOWEVER, if you're committed enough to plug your way through the film then you will be rewarded with some fun little tidbits such as the scene where the now fully grown Doberman pup (who also possesses highly evolved intelligence) is waiting in the car for her master. She spies a small little dog (I dunno what it was a Yorkshire, maybe?), opens the car door and proceeds to grab the dog in her mouth and shake the life out of it. She then hides the tiny dog's body in some shrubs, jumps back in the car and closes the door! Aside from the homicidal tendencies, that's a pretty neat pooch!<br />
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Also be on the lookout for Roddy McDowall as chess expert Frank Riley. He takes on Victoria in a chess game and when she (quite obviously) lets him win, he completely loses his shit and storms out screaming "YOU LET ME WIN! NOBODY LET'S ME WIN!" It was a pretty amusing moment!<br />
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There are some other fun moments, but I'm not going to spoil them all. If ya wanna find them, ya gotta put in the time and watch the flick! I'm such a bastard, aren't I?<br />
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Need further incentive? Oh fine. Barbara Carrera also has a nude scene. If that isn't incentive enough to watch, then I dunno what to tell ya!<br />
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<u><b>GORE</b></u><br />
There's a little bit 'o blood....but not much. <br />
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<b style="text-decoration: underline;">T&A</b><br />Barbara Carrera. Naked. You're welcome.<br /><br /><b style="text-decoration: underline;">MONSTERS</b><br />
Well, if homicidal, genetically modified and grown dogs and people count as monsters........<br />
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<u><b>FINAL THOUGHTS</b></u><br />
Like I said before, this one can be a bit rough to get through. I don't recommend watching it alone unless your a hardcore b movie junkie like myself. There's a lot of talk and a lot of filler, but there are the aforementioned bits that I think make the film worth seeing. Also, you would never guess it by the rest of the film, but the ending is pretty nuts and totally took me by surprise! I would go so far as to say that the end actually made up for the boring parts of the rest. <br />
If you've got some like minded friends and wanna have a MST3K-Fest....this would be a perfect film to use. If you're a b movie junkie......have at it! <br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><i><b><br /></b></i></span>Matthew St. Cyrhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07870183182967553900noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7632679281924009509.post-15348765708710280022015-09-20T14:49:00.001-04:002015-09-20T14:52:40.192-04:00Midnight Cinephile Podcast Episode VIII - Tribute to Wes CravenEpisode VIII is here and this time the boys and I pay tribute to the late maestro, Wes Craven.<br />
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So grab a cocktail and make yourself comfortable!<br />
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<iframe allowfullscreen="" height="360" mozallowfullscreen="" msallowfullscreen="" oallowfullscreen="" scrolling="no" src="//html5-player.libsyn.com/embed/episode/id/3810678/height/360/width/640/theme/legacy/direction/no/autoplay/no/autonext/no/thumbnail/yes/preload/no/no_addthis/no/" style="border: none;" webkitallowfullscreen="" width="640"></iframe><br />
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Midnight Cinephile is a proud member of the throwback network....you're home for great retro themed podcasts.<br />
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You can also find us on iTunes and Stitcher!Matthew St. Cyrhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07870183182967553900noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7632679281924009509.post-49636330031191236892015-09-04T03:33:00.001-04:002015-09-04T03:33:25.501-04:00The Chill Factor - Demonic Slasher on Ice<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<span style="font-size: x-large;"><b><u>The Chill Factor</u></b></span><br />
<b><u><span style="font-size: large;">1993</span></u></b><br />
<b>D: Christopher Webster</b><br />
<b>W: Julian Weaver</b><br />
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<b>S: Dawn Laurrie, Aaron Kjenaas, Connie Snyder</b><br />
<b>Rated R - Approx 93 Minutes</b><br />
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<b><u>Taglines:</u></b><br />
<i>Just when you thought it was safe to go back on the slopes.....</i><br />
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<b><u>Alternate Titles:</u></b><br />
Demon Possessed<br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><b><i>"Stop whining you stupid girl, we have to get Tom to a hospital!"</i></b></span><br />
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It's late on a Thursday night. The Mrs is in bed and I'm already in a few cocktails on my way to feeling pretty nice. Sure, I could pop in a Night Flight disc and lose myself in a sea of ancient and obscure music videos but instead I'm feeling the urge to watch some ancient and obscure horror flicks. And so, I delve down the Amazon Instant Video rabbit hole.....down past the usual suspects (World War Z, Leprechaun, etc) and down to the bottom of the digital barrel. The place you can only reach by clicking the "Customers Also Watched" section. Seriously. How did they also watch these flicks? They pop up NOWHERE else! It's quite amazing, really.<br />
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That;s where this film lives. This time up we're taking a look at a little supernatural slasher gem called The Chill Factor. Apparently it's also known as the more blasé title Demon Possessed, which I think is an absolute crap title. I mean, The Chill Factor is such a flavorful yet ambiguous title. Is it referring to actual temperature or frightful chills? An intriguing question! If you were watching under the Demon Possessed moniker, you would pretty much know what you were getting (though not really, but kinda sorta in this case...we'll talk about that in a bit.).<br />
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See, there's a group of friends who go on a snowmobile trip up north. While they are enjoying a meal and some brewskies, two of the fellas get into an argument about who's snowmobile is faster. You know, real meaningful stuff. They ask the waitress, who gets shit done (according to her hat), where they would be able to find some wide open land to race their machines and definitively determine who's the king of superfluous seasonal vehicles. They're told about Black Friar Lake (which apparently the locals have shortened to just Black Lake) which sounds like a perfect place to race crotch rockets attached to skis!<br />
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I know that this is going to come as a shock to you, but one of the lads is injured during their race. He hits a rather nasty snow mound and catapults himself into a tree, sustaining some considerable injury. Being that the group is something like 30 miles from town, the seek shelter at an old summer camp. After assessing their friend, one of them decides to go back to town to get help. The others stay behind to watch over their wounded friend. This is where they find the dumbest looking Ouija Board I've ever seen. They decide to use it to "kill time" and end up summoning up a demon that possesses their unconscious friend. <br />
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So now this guys laying on a bench in front of a fire and he miraculously wakes up. Everyone's all super excited. Of course they don't pick up on the fact that he's acting strange. This is where the film becomes a slasher as the possessed guy kills off his friends. Well, sort of. He actually just lays there all bandaged up on the bench while stuff happens to his friends, but it's insinuated that he's the cause when the camera pans to a close-up of him with a goofy evil smirk on his face. Though we do see the shadow of a robed figure with long, bony fingers with sharp fingernails stalking the victims. I'll go more into the various killings when I run the tally at the end of the review.<br />
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I was rather surprised by this film. I went into this expecting bottom of the barrel production values, bad acting and laughable effects. I pretty much got what I was expecting, but I wasn't counting of the fact that it was all going to coalesce into a charming, quirky trashterpiece that will definitely become a staple in my winter horror flick rotation. The music is a cross between an After School TV Special and someone rocking out on their Casio keyboard in the basement. The wonky dialog is accentuated by the hilariously terrible acting (see the quote that begins this review). The cinematography is pretty straightforward but there are a few nice shots once the gang is in the camp.<br />
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<u><b>Gore</b></u><br />
There's a decent amount of blood in this one, yet it still manages to be tame. For your money you get a snowmobile accident resulting in a bloody face and severely lacerated hand. A guy on a snowmobile catching a face full of barbed wire, a strangulation, an icicle through the eye and a few more kills to boot.<br />
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<u><b>T&A</b></u><br />
There's a little skin on display here too! Not a ton, but we do get to see two different girls in their bra & panties, some side boob and a brief flash of nipple. Hey, it's better than nothing, right?<br />
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<u><b>Monsters</b></u><br />
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Well, there's the shadowy figure that I'm guessing is the demon that is doing the possessing. There's also the guy who gets possessed. <br />
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<u><b>Final Thoughts </b></u><br />
This would make a great winter afternoon flick. Especially if you ran it as a double feature with They (aka. Invasion From Inner Earth). Picture it: The afternoon sun is hanging lazily in the sky casting it's golden light on the white snow while prisms of light dance on the wall courtesy of the icicles hanging outside your window. There's some chili that's been simmering on the stove all afternoon and a nice warm fire in the fireplace. You are snuggled up next to your significant other (or favorite pet....I don't judge) on the couch....all while a chilly doubly shot of questionable horror plays across your television screen. If that isn't a slice on Heaven on Earth, I don't know what is!<br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><b><i><br /></i></b></span>Matthew St. Cyrhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07870183182967553900noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7632679281924009509.post-85447480408245780932015-08-24T00:19:00.000-04:002015-08-24T00:19:28.655-04:00Midnight Cinephile Episode VIIIt's time again, kiddies to sit down by the campfire and listen to The Midnight Cinephile Podcast Episode VII!<br />
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Please join me in welcoming my good friends Tony Skowronski (aka Captain Cinema) and Chas Klimczak (from Watch And Be Amazed Productions) as they have accepted co-hosting duties on the show! It's another epic conversation, though there were gremlins in the phone lines. <br />
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Tune in and Chill Out!<br />
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<iframe allowfullscreen="" height="360" mozallowfullscreen="" msallowfullscreen="" oallowfullscreen="" scrolling="no" src="//html5-player.libsyn.com/embed/episode/id/3754293/height/360/width/640/theme/legacy/direction/no/autoplay/no/autonext/no/thumbnail/yes/preload/no/no_addthis/no/" style="border: none;" webkitallowfullscreen="" width="640"></iframe><br />
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Midnight Cinephile is a proud member of the <a href="http://throwbacknetwork.net/">Throwback Network</a>! You're source for Retro Themed Podcasts!<br />
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Midnight Cinephile is also available on iTunes and <a href="https://www.stitcher.com/">Stitcher Radio</a>.<br />
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Find Captain Cinema on <a href="https://www.facebook.com/captcinema?fref=ts">Facebook</a><br />
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Find Chas Klimzcak on <a href="https://www.facebook.com/pages/Klimczaks-Killer-Horror-Movie-Collection/419701504863777?fref=ts">Facebook</a> and check out <a href="https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCS3gidasJIFAbLMLZ409SFw">Watch and Be Amazed Productions</a> on YouTube!<br />
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<br />Matthew St. Cyrhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07870183182967553900noreply@blogger.com0